Listening and looking at the video brought back memories of my own development. The struggle of growing up in the church and in the community (1950's and 1960's Oakland,CA) without support or a positive gay role model.
I applaud the men in the video because it takes a lot of courage, even today, to tell our stories as they really are.

I am glad that this piece was included in Sunday's installment of 'Being a Black Man.' I am a black gay male who resides In the D.C. who is discrete. My friends and family don't know about me but I do not date women to cover it up. So people assume based on the fact that they have never seen me date women. It is hard enough for an educated black man to excel in the business world and I could not imagine being openly gay and having to deal with my family and the black community as a whole. Most in the community are very harsh toward homosexuality. It is painful sometime to listen to the church and my straight friends talk about gay people and them not having a clue that I am gay. I often wonder these people I call my friends, would react if I told them that I was gay. It is hard living dual life, I must admit. But I am just not at that point yet where I feel comfortable disclosing my sexuality. Hats off to these brothas in the video piece.

As a heterosexual black female I appreciate black men who has enough courage to say they are gay. I hope to see more of the conversation in the following weeks

I don't feel that the true essence of being a black gay male in America was captured in the 5+ minute video; there is so much more to be talked about, explored, and perhaps even debated. It does, however, give way to how many black gay males feel. Furthermore, the group really doesn't makeup , I would consider, the gamet of homosexuality amongst gay, black males. Specifically, most of the males pictured only showed one aspect of homosexuality amongst black males; there are teenagers, homo-thugs, black males who wear bandanas, jeans down to their buttocks, timberland boots, blue-collar (construction workers),executives,frat brothers,doctors, out , closeted, , educators, fathers, son, etc...

This is a start. A start in the sense of what black gay men are thinking after 20 years of enduring and surviving the AIDS epidemic. Not enough is being said or discussed as to what impact AIDS has had, and continues to have, on black gays' careers, relationships, family, and more importantly, their self-esteem. What was missed in this 5+ minute tape was the acknowledgement of the courageous endurance of those who have survived 20+ years living with AIDS, and its attendant losts, pains, and disappointments, yet be able to come together in a kind of fellowship that spoke of possibilities and hope. My gay brothers made me proud.

Wow! Intelligent, beautiful black gay men talking about issues and identity. Powerful. Moving. Necessary. It needs to be an on-going dialogue, all over these United States, and perhaps, the World. Bravo

I think that the video" Being a Gay Black Man" is excellent in that it introduced a lot of very important topics relevant to being a gay black man. I hope that the Washinton Post plans to run an article devoted to this issue where all of the topics introduced such as fatherhood and religion can be explored further. If such an article is written I hope that the proud and intelligent black brothers in the video will be included in the article. I am a clinical social worker employed with DC Public Schools and I have counseled many black gay teenagers. They need to read about and see positive black gay men who they can model. This can only serve to enhance their self esteem which they so desperately need after so often having been castigated by their families, communities and churches.

Such an article could also help to educate the public about an issue that most pepole are so ignorant about, especially regarding whether homosexuality is a choice or not. Actually the Washington Post should devote an article to this topic alone. The American Psychological Association, the American Psychiatric Association and the Natinal Association of Social Workers all contend that homosexualality is not a choice. Yet most religious groups refuse to accept these findings because then they would be unable to justify their bigotry. Even our President who is suppose to be half way intelligent stated in a public debate that he did not know if homosexuality was a choice or not, yet he is ready to legislate against a group of people that he admittedly knows nothing about. How resposible is that? Maybe such an article could help educate him.

I think that these men have strong identity issues. To not know who they are "as men" is a tragedy. I'm sure most, if not all of these men, grew up with next to no father figure. Whether gay men agree with me or not, they cannot argue with the statistics of this matter. Besides this point it's sad to hear them say that they think God doesn't love them, or at least doubt that point. This is false. God loves everyone but hates the sin... This is made perfectly clear. I would urge these gentlemen to read for themselves on this matter to get a better understanding. When I see these men or other gay men I pray for an epiphany, being that this lifestyle is in itself unnatural and gives an example of what happens when we don't want to except/know who we are. (Yes I said it!) - and most will argue that this is just what they are doing? Being gay is who they are- NO, being ignorant is what they are. I see these men living in nice homes, drinking fine wine, wearing nice clothes and speaking properly. These things are a great joy to possess, I know because I have them as well. It's just that I saw a strong black man have them first. At times what we see, we can't control, but what and who we emulate we can. There's that old saying..."if you don't know your history you're doomed to repeat it." Well this script has been written many times before with the same results. Many nations have perished because of this very reason and it baffles me that these men think that this is some new movement that will give them and their sin a place in society. Gentlemen, don't be ignorant! Your plight has always ended with the same result. I urge you to be strong black fathers and role models to children of your own decent that they too can have nice things but don't feel that they have to abandon who they are to get them. Be that man who provides for his family, loves his kids, and leaves them with an inheritance of knowing who they are, where they come from, and what they are expected to achieve. We must take this stand although no one did it for us- Make this your plight.

This is a good start.I doubt if anyone(who is not in my shoes) can possibly imagine what growing up was like being a black african muslim.Even now,it's only slightly better because I am independent.I am impressed.Keep it up.

I think this is just another great example of injustice in america. Not only do these men have a hard time right out of the gate being Black, but they are served a double dose of hardship because of their sexual identity. As a Black woman with several gay friends, I have seen first hand how hard they have it just gathering together, like any other group of friends would. I appreciate them opening themselves up to discuss and lament on the pressures and highs and lows of this added weight and I want them everywhere to know the "Sistahs got yo back!!!: It aint nothing but love..... for real! :)

I believe this was an educated and elite group of brothas discussing their gay lifestyle. The video should have captured gay men from various backgrounds.

This wasa great video. It obviously did not cover everything but it gave me an insight into the lives of my gay counterparts. As a Black male, I do not get an inside look into the lives of gay Black men. This video provided me at least a small vignette into their lives.

Please let me start by saying that our discussion was definately longer than the clip of five minutes. We also realized that we would not be able to cover nearly half of some of the issues. It is our intent to further discuss these and hopefully some sort of positive outcome will develope into maybe an outreach.

Good morning to my brothers,

Thank you very much for having such a discussion.

For many, many years, we have been told that, "there was
no homosexuality among our people, in Africa before the
Arabs and Europeans came", etc. Yet over the past few
years, I have met several same gender-loving sisters and
brothers of African descent who were born in Africa, the
Caribbean, other parts of the African world, etc. What do
you say to this? What has been your experience?

Again, God bless and thank you very much for your time
in having such an important discussion. :) :)

Although brief, I thought the piece was very insightful. It's often difficult for many people, including homosexuals themselves, to embrace, speak openly about, and understand what it means to be a gay man, let alone an african-american gay male. This conversation and dialogue helps not only black gay males, but the community at large.

It is extremely important for young, african-american teens and young adults to embrace their skin and their style (lifestyle). More conversations like this are needed to assist in the mentoring process to help young people, who at times seem to be careless with their lifestyle choices. With time and age comes wisdom. And we should pass it on.

I would like to see the conversation in its entirety. Great work.

What you accompolished was monumental. I hope the Black community can really apperciate the openess of these men and realize that being gay is not hurting the Black community. Not being open and talking about it is hurting the Black community. You should consider doing a segment on a Black Lesbians in the Black community.

Thank you for this piece and the accompanying video. Much of what I have learned that is of value about family and love came from my relationship and friendships with gay black men. Those who are unafraid to speak their truth are to be admired and respected and have much to teach not only the black community, but everyone, about living life fully, honestly, openly, and blessed by God.

I hope the Post will not "check this off the list" but instead choose to integrat gay perspectives into all their reporting, in this series about gay black men, and in general. We are part of this community and we are under attack from many fronts. That is not victim hood ... that is reality. You have an ability to educate and inform. Thank you for choosing to do it here.

There's nothing more eye-opening than an insider's view into a world that I'm not familiar with. I'm grateful to the Post and to the gay black men who allowed their thoughts and feelings to be shared with us. Thank you for giving us a little window into the life of being black, gay, and male.

Very interesting...

I am a black heterosexual female and I am too glad that black men who are gay are willing step up and announce who they are. I know it is not easy but I think that honesty is the best policy. Being honest with yourself and with others is a way of getting burdens off your chest. I just wish that men who are on the "down low" would accept themselves as gay or bi-sexual and be honest with a sister and hopefully it will lower the risk of STD's and AIDS.

Personally I believe all gay men should be loud and proud, don't hang you head low, accept who you are and stand tall. One thing I must point though, I respect that much more than those fly by night gay men. This is a lifstyle committment not a experiment. If you are Gay say it and be Proud, isn't that would Gay Pride is about!

As a black, gay, male father who has reared two healthy sons, I am pleased that the Washington Post used this video to explore one aspect of black men. No, it did not cover every possible representative of black gay males because the diversity would have required a larger space.

I would hope that the Post will continue this dialogue with interviews of men like Keith Boykin, Rev. Herndon Davis, Rev. Dr. Peter Gomes, H. Alexander Robinson, Tim'm West, Cleo Manago, and others who can well articulate the difficulties of being black and same gender loving in America.

And finally to those who would misuse the promises of religion to exclude rather than include same sex loving people of color, I would commend to them the true preaching of Jesus that they should "love ye one another, as I have loved you." Let us leave the judgement to the "Judge."

I can only appreciate the honesty of the men who came forth in this video. All of us are human no matter what color or sexual preference. It is fault that we all share we judge. And in the true sense of religion no human has the right to do so. I feel that as a black woman this is only one of the many road blocks we face as race. Self love in my opinion is one of the only ways that anyone can grow in a way that is gainfully affective towards a positive outcome. I can only pray for these men and many ohters like them who face the hardships of not only being a black man but being a gay black man. It may sound strange but I think that all women should have a gayman as a good friend. I really think that is would help with a lot of the problems we face with staight men. After all just because they are gay they are still men and have a lot of insight. I truely wish that I had an opportunity to converse and get to know a gay black man if only to help to understand each other and grow. Thanks for the opportunity to share.

To be brutally honest, I really don't see "gay males" as men period. A black man in America's got it even harder if he's "gay"! This entire series is dedicated to the hardships that black men experience, and it's fitting for black homosexuality to be included. With the devastating AIDS/HIV rate among black women in this region/nation, this is a "topic" that must be included given this "down-low plague" within the community. As you might've guessed by now from my acerbic tone, I am a black woman. To me, black gay men are a blight upon the community and a threat to the survival of the black race.

To the Editor: I review the recent video "Being a Gay Black Man". I found the video to be interesting however, The video had a intelecture side only, Brian spoke about his relationship with the church which I found most interesting. I am a chrisitan gay man from California. I prefixed the fact that I am christian first and my sexuality is secondary to that. I enjoyed the video however, I would advised the producers to "Keep it real". We as gay black men we know about the hardships, what we need to do is to try and find some solutions to these harships as a community. Also, we need to get into the core of our relationships with each other. i.e our relationships with ourselves, with our lovers, families, and the community as a whole.
Thanks,

R. Johnson

I commend the Washington Post to include Black gay men in the "Being a Black Man" series. Many people do not acknowledge Black gay males as being men let alone Black educated men. This video is truly important to the Black community and world. I would however, like to see a more diverse group of men. I feel it is very SAFE to get a group of educated Black men in the room to discuss being Black and gay in America. However, if you want a bigger impact with a true reality of being Black gay in America, show the faces of the "thug homo" who some THINK cannot articulate or hold a conversation (little do you know many of them have degrees). Let's hear from the blue collar brother that has a dollar and a dream to make it in this world but just can't get a break or the bother that got beaten because of his sexuality. Let's bring the two worlds together and there you will get the essence of being a Black Gay man in America.

The video is a great start and again, I commend the Washington Post. I look forward to viewing more video from the series. I would also love to screen the complete video at Queer Black Cinema, NYC's ONLY monthly Black LGBTQ film series. We have a wonderful ReelTALK discussion after the films.

It is important for Our Stories to be told in the truest form. We have a long ways to go but a great start. Let's continue to dialogue so we can finally heal.

Warmest Regards,
Angel L. Brown
Founder/executive producer
Queer Black Cinema, NYC's ONLY Black LGBTQ Monthly film Series
www.queerblackcinema.com

I am very pleased that finally an open and honest conversation among Gay Black men has begun.

I do not know how some can say that the group was not diverse. How can one tell that by looking at a 5+ minute video? It boggles my mind that so many people even in the gay community can make such judgements just based on looks. We should know better. You can not tell whether someone is a Doctor, Lawyer, a Thug or any other subgroup just by looking.

My other point is that to change the community one must start at the home. We must teach our kids and loved ones to love and respect each other regardless of race, gender or sexual orientation.

I must give kudos to Kanye West for his bold statement to the Rapper and Hip Hop Community to "Stop hating Gay People". Guess what? It started at home. When he found out that his cousin was gay he realized that if he hated gay people that would mean that he also hated his cousin. He loved his cousin. This changed his perception. One person, one family, one community. That is what it is going to take to change hate into respect and love.

Thank you for this series.

I'm very impressed by the series however; it just pains me tremendously to see Black men who are gay. It really does. To see black men especially smack their lips and do hand gestures like me is just plain sad.

Yes, God loves you! He loves us all but hates the sin. I believe strongly that homosexuality is by far a choice. There is a spectrum if you will of people who are:

1-born gay (small # maybe 10%)
2-gay by choice in the middle (70%)
3-gay by molestation (20%)

God made us sexual beings. We are the only animals on this earth besides dolphins that have sex for pleasure. It is a choice. You can choose and you do so.

We all have to answer to the maker. We all will be accountable. No one can judge. We will all stand alone when the time comes.

I don't feel that homosexuals should be discriminated in a court of law, it is unconstutional, however, I don't see why they would want to be married and come under a covenant under God when he sees your lifestyle as a sin. Every bible, Torah, Koran, etc. sees it as such. I think the move is just to be seemed as okay. To feel justified. To feel like you are not in the wrong if you get married in a church.

I think it is just sad. We are losing or black men to prisons, homicides, drugs, and homosexual life styles. It is very sad.

Thank you for the space to voice my opinions. I know it is not popular or politically correct and I hope I didn't offend anyone. It was not my intentions.

I am not sure why so many Black people put God in everything. Why do so many gay Black men fear God? Why are we allowing this God to determine how we should live our lives. I hate this! I really wish that Black gay men would get a clue about who they are and own it. We are great! This man-made God can not be all that, we are.

Firstly I would like to say I am a gay black man whom moved over here from Ireland 10 years ago , and since then I have seen many things such as racist sexist beatings outside gay bars etc but I have seen more GOOD things since my move over across the pond as it were , like peoples humanity to accept me as a life loving homosexuall and embrace all I have to give (I am a vocalist)and they are sooo willing to ....well just to be nice , If the rest of the world were like this IT WOULD BE A BETTER PLACE! GOD Bless America .

This was GREAT! We need more dialog like this. I know that there are several (A LOT)spiritually minded men who are behind closed doors (DL or whatever) struggling to "keep it in" while they carry out their lives and ministries.

Yes, several want kids; many take care of their families. I know of a gay male who was asked by his sister and brother-in-law to take care of their 4 kids in the event that they passed before him. It is about love people.

God is a very large part of the equation due to heritage. We can relate to a Christ that was loved, but hated at the same time. We can relate to being crusified for being who we are an yet innocent. While Christ died for the sins of the world and this is in no way equal to whatever suffering we have, there still is some solace in this parallelism. "He knows my name. He knows my every thought. He hears me when I call."

Keep up the good work.
Kee

To Wali:

Again, it is sad that you would take God out when suitable. Are you saying, you are all that, you are God?

We all believe or not believe things to justify our lifestyles even when we know we know the truth. Living in the Matrix!

So, who are Gay black men Wali?

I don't belive that anyone should be treated differently or unjustly by any human being on this earth; PERIOD.

However, I don't condone the gay lifestyle and it saddens me to see gay people, especially gay black men. I'm not angry or hostile justed deeply saddened. We I see gay people, or know gay people, or love gay family members I'm am just saddened. It is not how I seem black men. It just takes away.

Thank you for the series. The interviews were great, well thought out and well written. I look forward to reading more.

I would like to thank you and your staff for taking the time to even consider writing about such an issue. There are so many layers to are being and the public needs to know. We are not just guys who go from club to club or jump from one bed to the next, but men who live normal lives and are faced with many different issues. We are concern about things such as family and religion and Aids is not always are main topic of conversion. Thank you again and please continue to discuss and write about us. We are not going any where and we have been here since the beginning of time. Now let's give them something to talk about.

Being Black and Gay in America is a constant war and struggle for freedom for me. Ever since I "came out" I get told more and more in subtle and harmful ways to go back in the closet,to the cage of secrecy and silence. I've been out since I was sixteen in Philadelphia, but I've been fighting homophobia longer than that since childhood in the neighborhoods of North Philadelphia.

Being Black for some African Americans means to be insolent and ignorant to one's kind, and Being Gay means being weak and passive and "feminine" and when you fit none of these stereotypes/cages then you are really are in trouble.

I realized recently what I'm truly am.
I am neither thug, nor player.
I am neither punk, nor sissy.
I am neither dumb, nor ignorant.
I am neither criminal, nor crazy.

I am a man. I am a full fledge man with his own thoughts, ideals, and feelings on his life. I am the creation that God sets me up to be. I am the captain of my own destiny. And most definitely I am the man that I always wanted to be.

A kind man, A loving man, A smart man, and definitely a strong man becuase to survive this long in the open as a Black Gay Man in America is not only a blessing; its a miracle. Not only do I have to worry about the occassional gay basher in society, but I also have to worry about the hateful homosexuals who causes confusion and controversey in my life.

I'm Gay and Open about my sexuality when I want to be. I'm Gay and Open at work. I'm Gay and Open with Family. I'm Gay and Open with God. Although most Americans see me as a minority I don't becuase I'm not a minority to God so I'm not a minority to nobody. I'm Gay and Open because, yes, I choose to be open with my sexuality becuase my form honesty tells me to be.

I've sat on panels discussing HIV/AIDS in the Black Community. I've sat in support groups run by Black Gay Men. I've even done the social network scene in Philly which is the clubs and parties and what i've witnessed is not only shocking but depressing becuase either AIDS had killed the vigilant proud Black Gay Man or homophobia and DL has finally won. In Philly, the city of Brotherly Love, Black Gay men are practically extent like some rare species of buffalo.

We rarely see each other; and we rarely look at each other when we do see each other. And I think its becuase of the homophobia and the DL hyped up by the Media and by ourselves that allowed this form of genocide to happen.

So in a nutshell why do I still live in Philly? Why do I still declare myself "Gay" in a city and a country that will love to see me six feet under than on the top soil, living and walking? Why do I not "change" my religion, so to speak, and get with the program of heteroseuxality or at the very least act "DL" for that's what "DL" really is, an act of high creativity and confusion.

Its like I said before. Being Black and Gay in America is a constant war and struggle for freedom but that doesn't stop me from being a man. Thank you Washington Post for at least finally allowing the voices of intelligent Black Gay men be heard, and thank you again for even listening to my voice. For the record, my name is Doniel Anthony Wooden, but I like to be called "Mister Defense" if you don't mind.

It was very nice to see black gay men represented among the various perspectives about what it means to be a black man in America. In so many ways, we are seen as black men first-- stuggling through the barrage of stigmatization, stereotype, and racism that many or most black men face. Unfortunately, because of our sexual or attractional orientations, we are often ostracized by the very communities we have been told we can rely on for support. I'd love to see the exploration of a conversation between black gay men and our straight brothers actualized. I believe that there is a great deal of healing to be done, and black gay men have far to much to offer our communities economically, creatively, politically, for us to continue ignoring the big pink elephant in the room impeding our political progress. Thanks for the integrity of your scope. The men, many of whom I'm pleased to know, are but a segment of this community, but their visibility says volumes about our ability, not just to be spoken about, but to speak for ourselves.

First I would like to say that I am glad to see black gay men speaking of their place in the world, so this is a good thing. What is difficult is there was no discussion of the lack of a Black Gay Community out side of a few groups within just a few cities. As a Black Gay man I often feel that I am an outsider looking in to the larger gay community which allows only limited access.

Coming from the mid-west (Kansas), I can honestly say that there was not a group of positively identified Black Gay Men that could support me as a gay man in my own community. Most of my friends were white and from religious backgrounds that are fairly intolerant gay people in general. The difference comes from a gay community that readily says "Come join us" to white gay men and says "Come join us with the condition of assimilation" for Black Gay men. I knew many Black Gay people but they were for the most part absent as an accepted member of the larger Gay community. When present we are ignored, barely tolerated, or used as pawns for some other gain which outwardly show an attempt at diversity but ultimately segregates and stereotypes.

Ultimately, I don't feel that Black Gay Men in America feel they have a community to go to that will support them in the same way that White Gay Men are supported in most parts or our country today.

Peace,

Dennis Brown

I am very proud to see out black brotha's talking about this issue. I have dealt with this for years. I was raised in the church, Love the Lord, was married, was told that if you were gay or practice homosexuallity that you were going to hell.

At the age of 33 I was "outted" by my former wife to my family, friends, co-workers, and church members. To make a long story short, I was very involved in my church as a Choir Director, and Lead Singer. When everything hit the fan I had no choice but to deal with it. I then came out of the closet and decided to be, "ME!" I've never worn my sexuality on my shoulder, however I came to the conclusion that there was no since of pretending if I ever wanted to be happy and free at least to myself if no one else. So now I have been out for 7 years now and LOVE being just who I am, and not have to care so much about what the world thinks of who I am, because of who I have in my bedroom.

Jerry

Omaha, NE

My view on the interview is that number one the interview was too short and I personally don't think that you didn't represent the true spectrum of quote end quote versatility of true black gays. I personally relate to "men" that don't fall into particular catergories the men on this intreview "look gay to me" I also am frustated with giving a damn about what the church thinks about my lifestyle particularly when I always see fellow members out and about cruising Saturday and "repenting" Sunday morning

i loved it.as a black gay man here in athens georgia i have always wanted to represent my community in a pleasant way. i am a lovinng brother who is so tired of the dl scenario or the cruelty to hiv brothers always being the topic of discussion. i wish there was a weekly series like the video i just saw.thank you very much for making me smile tonight as i saw people like me who want to have kids and be in love from the heart and just live life you know.

I thought this was a beautiful piece. Very well put together, and very comprehensive. I thought the issue of having kids was an excellent one, and often overlooked. I think most beckoning is the the issue of a gay black man/couple wanting to have their own children. I also enjoyed the discussion about gays and the church within the black community. Ultimately, it was refreshing to see a group of intelligent black gay men portrayed as multi-dimensional human beings.

it's interesting that people are pained "to see Black men who are gay." Even more intriguing that said people "believe strongly that homosexuality is by far a choice." Most baffling is that said people validate their argument with magical statistics:

1-born gay (small # maybe 10%)
2-gay by choice in the middle (70%)
3-gay by molestation (20%)

As a statistician, it pains me (if you will) to see this fabricated data. I think it's important to ask yourselves (to whom it may concern) why does it pain you to see BLACK men who are gay? more to the point, why BLACK men? Is homosexuality race dependent?

In response to the next item referenced above, I must apologize, but it seems I missed the registration date where one signs up for their sexual orientation.

As far as "God" goes...YES...I AM GOD. With every breath that I take...I AM GOD. With every beat of my heart...I AM GOD. When I fail to judge another human being...I AM GOD. When I love and respect everything around me, even that which I cannot understand...I AM GOD. When I challenge an institution based on documents designed by man...baby...I AM GOD - creating my existence one breath at a time.

We can't all be the Dr. King's of the black gay struggle. Why would any self-respecting black male subject himself to society's redicule and degradation by announcing to the world that he is same-gender-loving (SGL)? Yes, this may be construed as cowardice. Thankfully, Dr. King didn't feel the same way as he led the civil rights movement but by-and-large, the majority of black men that live "normal" heterosexual lives and self-identify as heterosexuals and still date other men, just aren't as brave. Cutting to the quick, do not hate those of us black men that choose not to openly proclaim our love and affinity for other men. Society does not require straight people to openly procalim thier 'straightness', nor should gays wear a scarlet letter. Until we have a material and sustained culture in America for acceptance and tolerance toward SGL people, some of us are quite content watching from the sidelines... or from the closet.

Thank you for producing this wonderful video ("Being A Gay Black)! Although it is short, it opens the doors to a subset of the Black population that is ignored by so many. It makes me sad and angry at times to hear Black women attribute problems in the Black community to people "living" the "gay life style". Come on, let's own up to our own issues. Women who degrade the "gay lifestyle", in my opinion, are lonely, depressed, lack relationship skills, certainly have been mistreated by men, and most likely are not marraige material. One thing for sure, I've noticed many Black gay men who are professionals and responsible. Many other Black men have become "professional baby- makers" and not responsible. Let's keep it in perspective folks. It's easy to point fingers when there are no mirrors in the room (speaking in your own space). EVERYONE, please own up to your responsibilities in life and work on your self-image. Do this, and this world will be a better place.

Dear Post,
Untill to black people realize more to accept their homophobia there is no talk of acceptence of their same gender loving bothers and sisters.

Thank you for sharing this video with the world. Though there is so much more to cover and I would have loved to see a more diverse crowd of gay black men depicted, this series will play a role in dispelling some myths about what it is to be black and gay.

Black gay men are such a uniquely diverse gamut of beings. From the openly gay, to the closeted, and everything in between. From the gay father, to the gay child, adolescent, teen, adult, uncle, brother, grandfather, cousin, etc. The artist, the athlete, the student, the white collar worker, blue collar worker, and even down to the ones struggling to find themselves in a world that seems to be for everyone but them. We all have a common bond yet are each unique with a story most people will never be compassionate enough to understand.

But again, thank you for shedding some light on what it is to be gay and black.

I personally loved the video because it shows that not all black gay men are restricted because of the life style that they live. I am a black gay male who is Hiv+ and when they started talking about the church situation I found that very interesting because I am also in recovery and I know that I have a God that sit high and looks low and continues to take care of me. He showers me with blessings beyond my wildest dreams so to say that God does not love gay people is truly wrong and because we are still children of God we just made a choice that everyone doesn't agree with but they did agree with Jesus and he did what God sent him here to do.

I have worked as a volunteer in the Camden, NJ area on fair housing for economic-minorties and only saw one black gay couple obtain housing. They were Lesbian and had children. A whole lot easier for them then for Gay men. I am one and did not come out until I was 65 yrs old. My children said "big deal dad, be happy" So many years dreading the truth. "Eh"

I thought the video was a good beginning in the conversation of Black Gay Men. I certainly could relate to the perspectives shared regarding beging gay in the Black church. I have spent my entire life in the church but never felt comfortable sharing my lifestyle with church members or my straight friends. But I know they know the deal. My hope is that one day I'll have the courage to be open about being gay.

As a single father of three adopted boys, I thank the Washington Post for this piece.

This was a wonderful piece. A bit short though. I look foreward to more pieces like this in the future.

Thank You.

As a married, black & God fearing woman, the video was very interesting. I wouldnt mind sitting in on the whole discussion. It was an account of a voice never heard. It is my experience however, and from what I've heard in the clip that most gays & lesbians feel or struggle with the question of God's love. The church seems to be a big issue and the focus of a lot of pain & rejection. I admit homosexuality and the church is like oil and water. I know that many churches have failed in dealing with the subject of homosexuality. It seems that most have simply taken the word of someone else in determining what God thinks. I challenge anyone who is interested to read the Word for him/herself, if you are in fact God fearing, to get the one and true authority on the subject. God loves all people, from every walk, every background. (2 Pet 3:9, John 3:16). He says that we were created in His image; so we all possess a part of Him and are a reflection of Him. (Gen 1:2;9:6). Delving into debate being born vs. a choice may not be too fruitful to discuss at this point, however, I do feel it is possible to be born with homosexual tendencies. Not because of any statistics or from someone's personal account, but from God's Word. This is not to say that I agree with homosexuality, because I do believe it to be sin, the bible says so. But, the Word says that we, all of us, everyone one was born into sin. John 3:3-7, Ps. 58:3). We were all born with a sinful nature, sinful tendencies, and thereby all need his help, redemptive power and love to restore us to the purpose in which we were created.(Rom 3:23) So whether we are gay or straight we are in need. I think that is what matters most. Personally, I think most people are living lifestyles God does not approve of regardless of their sexual orientation. Read the Word for yourself, you do not have to take anyone's word for anything, but God's. His is the only Word that matters. If you believe some of it you must believe all of it. If you are curious or never actually read for yourself: Lev. 18:22, Lev. 20:13, Deut. 23:17, 1 Cor.6:9, 1 Tim 1:9, Rom. 1:26-27.

This was fabulous. I could feel their pain. I wish everyone could see this.Ed.

As an African-American lesbian, it was nice to see "real" gay black men interacting, in a "normal" environment. All too often we see black gay men depicted as flaming queens, hungry for a man. Hopefully, this will open eyes about who black gay men really are... Educated, well-spoken, talented individuals.

This video is very Powerful. Like most others, it reminded me of my own experiences being a Gay Black Man in America. I would like to get the full series.

There sshould be a nationwide public discussion group on this subject with Both Gay and Straight brothers openly discussing this. It should also be reprinted in every major newspaper across the country. Once again The wasington Post has tisen to the Top and shines brigher than the Brightest Star.

I thought it was awesome. I wanted to hear more of the conversation though. I wonder if the WP can partner with NBC or another station to run this as a special. It could even be on LOGO with CBS.

Thank you for presenting a face of black gay men; however, that face mirrors white gay men. There are many black gay men who do not emulate the white gay lifestyle. Recognizing several of the men in the video, I know they do not have a interracial relationship. However, the host's picture of he and his lover (white fellow), promotes a one-sidedness to the piece--a misrepresentation that all black gay men have white lovers. What you saw remains an oddity because gays and lesbians of color know the white gay world is a double-edged sword because many must force themselves into white gay molds, but in truth remain the "other" in the majority of white gay and lesbian eyes. The Post has done a good job, but signiificant improvement is needed.

I am a black gay male living in the Detroit metro area and just like many of US cities with a majority black population those cities are full of black lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. This piece gives a peek into our world. This piece I think will be helpful to especially let our community (Black) know that we exist and that we are everywhere.

It is my firm belief that if in our black community we had an environment of love for another many black men and women lives can be improved, both gay and straight. But we must stop using God for hate and use God's compassion for uson each other. One of biggest thing that hurts us in the LGBT black community is that in many cases we ourselves perceive that we are not loved by our black families. I think we can be, but like any family dispute it requires extensive conversations.

Washington Post, if you really want to be apart of something more groundbreaking, be apart of the movement to facilitate the conversation between the LGBT black community and our straight counterparts. You can be a part to help heal a deep wound in our community. This video is a start, keep it up.

It is saddening that despite the lingering hardships of discrimination against black men in general, black people (particularly those in the church) feel the need to discriminate against gay black people. I'm not sure why there is such a strong desire to denigrate those one doesn't understand. I appreciate this dialogue being included -- perhaps hearing eloquent men speaking about their hopes for the community as a whole will open up more dialogues in the future.

Being a Black Gay Man in America contains some very spiritually gifted and talented Black Men. I applaud their honesty and courage. It is a discussion much needed and long overdue. The terrorism incited by the Church (especially Black Churches) upon Black Gay Men in America continues perpetuate division within our commuity. As Black Gay Men in America we are strong towers of faith, love, and peace. We strive for justice and cherish family. I hope this authentic dialogue opens the door for more discussions about Being a Black Man in America and Being a Black Gay Man in America. We offer the rich perspective as Black Men and as Black Gay Men in America. Bravo Gentlemen, Bravo.

This was an good segment. It is definitely something that needs to be discussed. I would love to see this on a larger scale. There is so much variety in the gay African-American community just as in any other community.

Thank you for the wonderful, daring short documentary. The quality of the video was high and the contents caring and exploring.

I found this to be a very insightful conversation and one that needs to be shared in the communities of color throughout this country.
I feel for so long the black community has failed to address these topics in an open forum. I have heard from some black people that being gay does not exist in the black community. That being gay is a white people thing. I find there has been a denial and a lack of awareness in the black community at large concerning gay men, women, children and gay culture.
I also understand the difficulties that may exist for some people of color simply trying to exist and prosper in this country simply due to our color. So just maybe our taking on the struggle of addressing the gay issues has been viewed as even more overwhelming. I think unlike white gay and lesbian people who possess the luxery of being white and having access to the opportunities that being white affords, we as black gay and lesbian people are with out that luxery and insurance to fall back on in the event we decide to openly express our sexuality. So why risk it some of us think.
In spite of this we must be visable we must stand up and speak out for the right to be heard and to have equal access to the rights that all Americans are entitled to in this country and be assurred of peace and safety while doing so.

Wil Bruner
Tulsa Oklahoma

My name is Harold Cruz Latino 37 year old male. I want to Congratulate you guys for this small video clip. I am a Health Educator and I do a lot of Health Education services for my community here in the city of Allentown,PA. What you guys are doing is great. Once again would love to attend to one of your meeting in person. Once again I want to congratulate you for the great support that you guys have to one another,

Immediately, I noticed the "caliber" of men in the video-all seemingly educated and articulate. I think the session should have included men of various backgrounds. What must men of "lesser" background be experiencing being Black and gay in America? I can only imagine.

Perhaps there could be some kind of open forum on male homosexuality to assist us in understanding the behavior-not the fact that they are gay (though that may be the reason for their behavior), but the fact that they all seem super-sensitive. I have a few male associates who are gay, and their being gay does not bother me at all-who cares? What bothers me is their over-sensitivity. I find I have to always be careful what I say less one of my gay associates become offended.

All in all, I liked the idea of a video on gay Black men. Now, I would like to see one, or produce one,myself, on being black and a drug addict in America. Why,you may ask? It is because I have a brother, who hails from an upright, hard-working educated familye, but is on the street because of his drug addict. I worry about him all the time.

Thanks for the video

I appreciate all of you who had the courage to do the interview and express yourselves not only to your group but to you the masses. I believe that the dialogue should be opened up and that no one group deserves to be cast out(discriminated against). In the Black community we have many taboos as well as do's and don'ts. I will take a page for Theodore Roosevelt in saying, "It is not the critic who counts, not the one who points out how the strong man stumbled or how the doer of deeds might have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred with sweat and dust and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, if he wins, knows the triumph of high achievement; and who, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat." It is my wish and hope that this dialogue will spread and that the masses will consider where we can bridge the gap for all the peoples sake.

Arigato!

One of the participants claimed the group was an "eclectic" mix of black gay guys.

However, I found the group more "homogeneous" than anything and lacking in their collective ability to engender engaging and substantive dialogue, save the compelling comments about the black church and its response to black gay men.

Just as a side observation, did I see a framed picture of the host's "white" partner/lover/significant other?

I think this was a fantastic look into the black gay DC community. I've lived in several major cities but it is DC that has the reputation as the most open for Balck Gay men. Finally we are being included instead of excluded and it makes me feel good about the series and the editors of the Post for taking this giant step.

This is great dialogue! This conversation needs to include young black gay men and women in our communities. A lot of our younger brothers and sisters out on their own feeling lost and confuse.
In addition, the Africian American community as a whole needs to be a part of the conversation.
Please continue the great work, information, honesty with all the integerty.

Thank you! That video was very reflective of our lives and right on target. It covered a wide range of issues that are of core concern. It almost is hard to believe that I even saw it.

I am a 22-year-old gay male, attending Morehouse College in the Atlanta area. In the environment that I grew up in, you hardly ever saw positive images of black men in the media, much less gay black men. If we are ever depicted, the coverage has to deal exclusively with HIV/AIDS, suicide or the "down low" phenomenon. This is true even in the predominantly white gay media.

It's very warming to see normal gay black faces that reflect the reality of our lives. I now know for sure that I am not alone.

It is a great ideal to post that dialogue on the internet. The topics raised are very important to many Black men and so it was good to see us discussing those topics in a public forum. I think more of these topics need to be seen that we do have these discussion and how important they are with the joys and pains that we experience within those topics. The conversation need to continue to get more divers group of Black men of various backgrounds who will discuss such intimate topics on sexuality and the dual exsistance we sometimes opt to live or is force to live when it comes to our race and sexuality. Great job on a great begining as for as a public form. There are other organizations that are doing public forums who I know would be glad to have a wider access to the public discussing the same interests in the video.

I think there is some validity to what they were saying. I myself have at times felt that men who are on the DL have made it difficult for gay black men but I have issues with gay people in general. I have friends who are gay an I am able to accept them because I don't feel that they are trying to push their gayness on me but as a whole I feel that homosexual people feel that they must be accepted. That I must accept their way of life but for some gay men, their lifesytle would not come into questionif they didn't one try to emulate women and if they didn't tell the world what their sexual preference is. I thought that what is sexual is very private but now everyone, straight or gay wants everyone to know their sexual business, why? I think that GOD accepts all and as human being we must learn to do so. But I also think that gay black men must know that their lifestyle is going to be extra hard because it is hard just being a black person in America and then try being just a black man and then add being gay to that equation and it just becomes even harder.

I commend the Washington Post for giving both a face and a voice to the male members of the black gay community, who should be treated with the dignity and respect afforded all human beings.

Everyone needs love and understanding and hopefully the articles will achieve these goals.

It is a sad shame that the black community will accept a drug dealer, hooker, child molester, murderer, car jacker, and thief over a productive individual because his sexual practices are not the same as ours.

Blacks have not learned to recognize that the ones who commit violent crimes against gays, and accusing someone of being gay is creating a distraction to take the focus off themselves and places it on someone else so that they can do their dirt. These are call DL or closeted/undercover gays. They blend in with mainstream society very well, with little to no detection. But they do have a right to remain undercover, as long as they are not trying to expose others.

Every since the whole DL thing has become public knowledge, black women have been on a modern day Salem Witch Hunt. It's open season on the black male once again, but this time from within his own community. I believe that the only man a woman needs to worry about being on the DL is her husband or boyfriend. If you are not dating him, then you should not care, and leave his business alone. Stop accusing every man that walks pass you of being on the DL. Get a life and your own man.

For those women so fired up and on the mad hunt for DL men; my advice to you is to start with your own male family memebers before you hit the streets trying to expose everyone else. Thats ought to take some thunder out of your mission, because you are going to be surprised at what you will find.

Black people need to understand and accept that just because someone is gay, does not mean that he/she is loved any less by someone who is straight. I have a gay member in my family, and I love him with all my hurt, and I will not stand for someone trying to hurt or mistreat him just because he is gay. Remember that person is someone's son/daughter, aunt, uncle, or loved one.

How would you like it if whites could go around killing you and your loved ones just because you are black. Hate is hate no matter what kind it is. Hate kills, hates makes us all suffer. If we blacks are not killing eachother with our tongues, we are killing each other in the streets, causing families to pain in pain, longing for their slained loved ones. We need to get it together people and now. Start by raising your children and teaching them the lesson of life rooted in love for themselves and others.

Blacks have been taught self-hate for hundreds of years, and especially the gays ones. Then we wonder why there are so many social ills in our communities. If you read the Bible for yourselves and stop listening to those preaching selective hate from the old testament, you will learn that "a man that lies with another man's wife is considered an abomination" but you don't hear them preaching on that. Either preach the whole truth and nothing but the truth or don't preach at all. Reference the book of Lev. and read for yourself .

The old hypocrites of this world preach from the old testament and not the new. We are under the new covenant of the new testament, be deceived no longer that God hates you because you're gay. Let me explain. The old testament preaches & teaches an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth, life for a life. But the new testament, the one that is concerning Jesus' birth, life, and death; preaches & teaches life, salvation, repentance, grace/mercy, hope and faith. God hasn't rejected you, only man who wishes to hide his own sin by highlighting what others are doing. So go in peace, and strive to be what God wants you to be, not man.

A real man has no issues with gays if he is secure in his own sexuality. A real man is a proctector and not a hypocrite. You should be able to friends with anyone gay or straight and not fear guilt by association or care what others say or think. Thats a REAL MAN. A Real Man has nothing to prove to anyone, only to himself.

Ladies stop accusing a man of being gay just because he will not sleep with you. Get over it. You all dish out rejection all day long to us man, but the minute we don't want you, you all get mad and want to call us gay and start rumors. Most of you women don't handle rejection to well. Every man doesn't turn you on, and believe me, not every woman can arouses everyman. Get over it.

My people; stop projecting the self-hate that you feel for yourself onto others, and start to build more meaningful and positive relationships. This will help us grow strong again as a people like we once were during the sixties. We will reap what we have sown. Believed that. What you put out comes back to you, so put out positive and good things.

People, calling gays out of their names, mistreating them, disrespecting them, and talking about them is not the cure for gayness. Get a clue and get you some busy. Doing that only compounds the DL situation that you all claim you want to resolve. You will find that you're more of the problem, and not the solution by mistreatment of others. Why would someone that is DL come out if he/she sees how you all treat the ones that are openingly gay.

Thats like saying that you are on a hunt to burn all witches, and then you ask the person if their a witch. Don't be stupid, what do you expect them to act like or say?
So you see, you are part of the problem and not the solution. Word.

Last but not least, be careful if you the type of person always trying to expose someone's sexuality. It is best for you to mind your own business. Having worked in the justice system, I know that some guys are not going to go out like that, and if you threaten them in anyway, it may cost you your life. Remember, repeat offenders and street hustlers don't have much too lose, & the only thing they have is their rep on the street, and they are not going to let you just take that away from them. Remember that ladies, and gay guys. So many murderers are walking ours streets, free to kill again. Murder is wrong, I don't care if the person was gay, fat, or black. Murder is wrong. Stop the killing. Stop the hate, stop the jealousy my people. Becareful out there.

Peace and God be with you.

The men did not seem to delve into what it means to be a gay black man. Exactly what is the dichotomy between the two? I appreciate where one gentleman explained the "collateral damage" that does result from men being in-the-closet and in a females bed at the same time. Being true to ones-self is important, but I don't believe that everyone has to accept the differences, just respect the differences. Black people look to be liked and accepted without first liking and accepting ourselves. I've never had a conversation with a gay black male...I would truly like to have a gay black male for a friend.

am a 56 year old male(strictly heterosex-
al) and I find the homosexual act and/or-
homosexual lifestyle a bit offensive and
sometime utterly repulsive.I have a son who
struggled with the homosexual way of life.
I still love him and care for him,but I dont believe that God has called him to that type of life. My son is a saved man &
loves the Lord. But he has had a rough time
in dealing with this issue. My boy moves in
the Prophetic annointing. He hears from God
and the Lord communicates with him and uses
him as a witness amonst other things. I do
not believe God hates homosexuals exclusive
ly. The Word declares that the Lord hates
a liar&that a liar wont tarry in his sight
so what we see here is that there is no "de
gree of sin", but that sin is sin & God will deal with all sin persay.I just feel
that this lifestyle is wrong.God says to
"love the sinner but hate the sin".I dont
want this "Alternative Lifestyle" taught in
my grand son/daughter school.I dont want it
showing up in their library.I dont think it
should be a topic of discussion in their
class.If I want my kids to know about gay
issues, then I will handle that on my own
and in my own way.I resent the fact that
the homsexual movement is trying its best
to "force feed" their so-called rights down our throats. God will always have the
last say!Homosexuality is what is known as an "ABOMINATION".I think it is usually a
cut above "TRANSGRESSION" and "INIQUITY".
I do know that GOD "jacked" Sodom and Gomorrah because of their so-called alter-
nate lifestyle.You see, somewher down the line we all are going to look a Holy and
awesome GOD in his face and our money, our
ACLU lawyers,our party cronies,our excuses,our influence. Nothing will stand
between HIM andus.Then we all shall give an account.Bet money!

The piece I viewed was really informative and eye opening. I certainly hope that the complete conversation will be available for viewing.

i found the short video very thought provoking. i hope there will be more work done by the washington post in the future.

I'm a straight, mixed-race male with at least 5 nationalities in me. I do not have any issues with anybody's sexuality, be it black, white, hispanic, caucasian, indigenous, etc.

I think that being gay is not an issue of race, but part of being human. Since the very begining of time there has been gays from all walks of life.

However, among black communities, there is this belief that black males should be studs and should only like women and that they were put on this earth to create and be with women only.

Fact of the matter is that there are as many black gays as there are whites, asians, hispanics, etc.

Wow. I am happy to see that the Washington Post included the experiences of Black gay men in this series about Being Black in America today. I am a graduate student at the University of Southern California and my dissertation research focuses on the experiences of Black gay college men. I am looking to explore how particular experiences in college influence the identity development for Black gay men. I have found that as the Black gay community begins to mobilize themselves (e.g., Black Gay Pride Celebrations, Keith Boykin's writings, Clik magazine, etc.) there are more efforts from the mainstream media to explore the experiences for Black gay men. Therefore, I commend the Washington Post for opening this door to more mainstream attention, which will lead to empirical research studies to understand this subpopulation and reduce the hardships Black gay men may experience.

If any Black gay men attend a four year college and are interested in participating in my study, please e-mail me Vincent at VEV02@aol.com.

Growing up in Canada, where thankfully there aren`t quite the same odds stacked against blacks (in light of a much less heartbreaking black history,) the plight of gay black men is not much different from the plight of gay white men. And because the Canadian parliament has passed legislation recognizing gay union, among other its other far reaching protections, there is a legal legitimacy that compensates for any shortsightedness in the communities, white, black or green.

Let`s face it, homosexuality is and always will be viewed by some as an abomination. This is the struggle that gay men must strive to overcome when coming out, for even in progressive societies like Canada you can not legislate private opinions. And in that sense, the plight of the gay black male in America, while not seeming so on the surface, probably has little to do with blackness per se, but a lot to do with the general gay theme of breaking through community opinion.

I am glad that you produced the video. It is important for Black gay men to have a forum where they can share their experiences and feeling on what it is to be Gay and Black in America. The group of gay Black men brought up some interesting perspectives, yet I was disappointed by the brevity of the piece. I would like to see an extended version.

And if possible what about a story on Black Gay MALE couples - there are always depictions of interracial gay male couples, but it seems that Black gay male couples are non-existent. Black gay males need positive role models too. It would be comforting for other Black gays to know that healthy MALE Black on Black gay relationships truly exist.

I appreciate the Post doing this story on gay Black men in America. There are so many more stories that need to be told, but I guess this is a start. Please continue to evolve your stories so that they will reach a broader audience, but remain true to the important issues.

First and foremost, I believe homosexuality is wrong and unnatural.

What strikes me as odd is that the brothas want to have children. There is a process by which you produce children right? Now if you have chosen to reject this process for an unnatural one why would you want to have children? seems a little mind-boggling to me. Either you are going stick with your unnatural process or you are going to stick with the natural process, one cannot have a little of both.

The mere fact that the union does not have the potential to reproduce suggests that something is wrong with it. If this act was natural, it would be safe to say there there would be no life on earth at this time.

God loves His creation, however he hates the sin, and brothas can overcome this unnatural weakness if they are determined and are willing to accept that it is unnatural.

I believe that the gay black man is a manufactured identity crisis. Arguments can be made for both sides of the biological versus socialized debate when it comes to homosexuality, but in the end, no one is forcing men to go and have sex with other men. We all have our flaws and lower desires. From over eating to being to having a bad temper, it is the duty of each individual to controll these things that challenge our moral fiber unless we seek to allow these tendencies to control ourselves. This is the case with homosexuality. Rather than fighting to check this urge, this society encourages people to act on this and many other desires. The dominant society entices us to engage those impulses that are morally questionable and serve only the purpose of self-gratification.

Giving into the act of homosexuality is a sign of weakness. The strength and spiritual muster of black men has withered away through the course of slavery and centuries of oppression. This latest trend to make homosexuality acceptable within African-Americans culture is nothing but another sign of our misplaced priorities and continued spiritual oppression. Black America is in need of strong black men who can resist the urges of their lowest desires. We need black men to say no to drugs and alcohol; we need black men to fight against the exploitation of black women; we need black men to challenge ignorance. The last thing we need is a campaign to make it socially acceptable for two or men to lay up with each other talking about, "I love you."

Our communities are in crisis. Our women need respectable husbands. Our children need fathers. Black boys need positive role models. For us to continue as a people, we must rebuild the black family with men being men and embracing instead of running away from all of the attributes of manhood. And I don't believe that having sexual relations with another man is central component of manhood. It is an insult to our traditions as Africans and it is contrary to our customs as African-Americans to openly promote homosexuality as acceptable means of social interaction among our people. Black men, who are gay, do not promote the cause of African-American progress. They seek to put their fetish for other men's rectums before the good of our people. If African-Americans don't take a stand against the open promotion of homosexuality and over-sexualization of our children, this will be one among many sociall ills that will eventually lead to our demise as a people.

this is a great dialouge of issues but only touches the surface of the impacts of church/religion and being gay bring into the life of black men. The dynamics of race layered with the label of gay becomes a double negative not only within our community but also in the work place. The existance of bias still exist even within the gay culture and what might be accepting for non-black in a work environment is not equally accepted for blacks.

Thank you so much for putting effort into this topic. This is exactly what I want to see more of from the media in the US. It's great to see these conversations going on withing communities and especially great to see that the participants are diverse. Great Job.

As a black woman I appreciate those black men who are openly honest about who they are. I don't appreciate those that lie and mislead women. If you are gay, you're gay. Be honest with yourself and be honest with me.

Some of the responses here are just too much!

Cedric Howard goes on about the black community being in crisis and how gay men are contributing to the problem.

If the black community is in crisis then heterosexuals put it there. The gay aren't impregnating multiple women and then leaving their kids to fend for themselves.

The part about women needing respectable husbands begs the question, are the vast majority of hetero men so lacking that you need to recruit homos for husbands? There are plenty of single hetero men but apparently the 'weak' gay men are more suitable.

If there is a male role model crisis then again it is the heteros who are to blame. There are many times more heteros than homos but yet apparently few are adequate as role models.

It's the breeders that have turned the communities into a war zones full of drugs, anguish unsupervised and uneducated delinquents and unemployed, underemployed and unemployable adults.

Now after a life time of harassing, abusing and making life miserable for the homos, the heteros insist the homos ride to the rescue as part of a duty owed to them. How absurd.

It's also bizarre that some can't see that by getting an education, obeying the laws and becoming a productive member of society the gay brothers are serving as positive role models, regardless of sexual orientation. You can find fault with anyone. But why not take the positive.

Good day

God loves all that he created, so to tell a gay guy that he is not loved by God is not right nor is it true. However, sin is sin and God does not condom this type of physical behavior. Romans 1:28 is a prime example. God created Eve for Adam, not Steve. The same goes for women. Again, understand, I totally am outraged at the violent crimes against gay people, it hurts my heart tremendously. I do not condom violent hate crimes at any level. I do not hate gay people, I just do not agree with act, just like I do not agree with pre-marital sex. God does not condom that either. So no one can point the finger, nor truly judge because each one of us will be judged in the end. I just pray for everyone including myself when it comes to living a life pleasing to God...bottom line!
Regarding the men in the video, I commend their honesty in being open when so many are living lies, and the innocent are left to deal with the consequences of those lies. We need more gay men/women like you to come out and be honest! Give us the freedom of choice that you too desire.

Great Video!!

I have never witnessed anything like this video. The Post should do more interviews/videos similar to this one... Our community, especially the black community needs to be informed
Keep up the good work...

Thank you for this. As an openly gay white man, I have always found some unspoken segregation from black gay men, even when I lived in Washington DC, and never understood why. I surmised that their experience of being gay was different, and maybe more difficult, than my own, and that being with peers was more comfortable for both blacks and whites. But, I've always longed to find the common ground. This short video showed me that their experiences are both different and same, and I was able to hear, empathize, appreciate, and even understand the depths of much of what they said.

I loved the video. As always, the Post does a great job with these videos and specifically with this particular series. I'm a black man who happens to be gay. It's not that I hide my sexuality but my sexuality is not the driving force in my life just as someone's heterosexuality isn't and shouldn't be. Still, my sexuality as it relates to me being black does allow me to be more compassionate toward people who are different, just like the brother said in the video. And, if there are other opportunties to join in this discussion group, I would like to do so because I bring a somewhat different perspective. I'm not what heterosexuals may think of as stereotypically gay, i.e. a slight lisp, slightly effeminate, etc. (Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I think that's how many heterosexuals identify gay men.) Many times over the years people have assumed that I'm heterosexual, and when I tell them that I'm not, they are shocked. They'd say, "But, you don't look gay." I'd reply, "How do I supposed to look?" *silence* So, I love being the iconoclastic one because I'm out and my example shows that homosexuals are not always like we are portrayed in the media.

The piece failed to touch upon the fact that drug dealers,absent fathers/sperm donors and thugs are more highly regarded in black communities and organizations. Gay,productive and law abiding men are treated as pariahs. We don't go out of our way to destroy the lives of others.

I applaud the participant in the video. This brings back memories of my past with family and church along with growing up in a small town. I yet have difficulties coping with whom I am when it comes to my family and my home church and even at my place of employment. Through it all, I'm still here.

Great Video - wish it was available in dvd format for my use with young black men in my neighborhood. I came out at the age of 50, when I decided who I was. Being gay and white has not been a barrier for me to get along with the young black men in this area.

It was a very interesting piece to view. I wish it was a bit longer because it was hard to get the full feeling of the individual thought about being black and gay. I was hoping that there would have been some masculine men in the group to have the conversation about being black and gay and working in a homophobic society in america

I just dont think that its right to be a black gay male. Males are suppose to be role models and signify strength. Males were not designed to be female acting creatures and have sexual encounters with each other. They suppose to reproduce and populate the world. If you are Gay, that's your preference, but men are suppose to be with women.

I enjoyed viewing the article "Being a Gay Black Man". It is always a pleasure to see our Black Men and Woymn portrayed in an honest, open, non-sexual, non-stereotypical manner. I appreciate their interviewees courage and insights into their struggles and personal challenges. I hope that this will become an ongoing series of articles, and include Black Lesbians as well! Keep your readers posted! Kudo's!

My story begins at a very young age. I can tell you from the outset that black men have a lot to deal with from begets. I was born and raised in the projects in Harlem, NYC. My mom had 5 kids and was divorced twice before she realized she wanted to sleep with women. She had made that choice way before I was born. On the other side of the game, my pops was a fiend for the heroin and an alcoholic.

My moms and I had a very rocky relationship which was her reasoning for sending me into group homes. In my early teenage years some of her lifestyle choices had become an issue for me on certain levels. I was young and confused - it was sort of a love hate thing.

At the age of 13, I was already having frequent sexual encounters with a daughter of my mother's friend. When I was 12 yrs-old, while in a group home for boys, I had my first sexual encounter with another guy. I loved it. But, at the same time I felt ashamed and disgusted. I remember running to my dorm and into the shower and trying to wash away the memory and crying. For along time after that I did not think I could be a man.

By the time I was 19, after a few attempts with females, and after allowing the manhood in me to be compromised over the years, and because I did not know how to hold on to the man in me, I made the choice to accept my (male on male) sexual experiences and decided to live my life in the "gay" lifestyle. I spent over 15 years in the "Life" as we referred to it back in those days - "being free." Or so I thought. I spent much of my young years working hard and playing harder hanging in the "Village" in New York, club hoppin', and even had a relationship in my early 20's, which lasted 4 years with another brother from Harlem.

In my college days, I was involved with a few women, but none of the relationships lasted. I don't know, but there was always something inside me pulling me apart. In 1995, I did an internship in Washington DC. I stayed with this interracial gay couple who were in their older 40's. I can tell you after living in DC and seeing the going "ons" you are never the same. I had never seen so many affluent gay black men, and I wanted to be like them.

I learned a lot in the summer of 1995 living in southeast Washington DC, the good and the bad. I am a cynical person and so I tend to observe and reflect on the bad stuff more. For me there are lessons in them. In DC, I was introduced into a black gay society that I never knew existed - very exciting filled with friends, restaurants, statuses, fancy homes, clothes, cars, and parties.

I also saw the extreme opposite...the loneliness, the bitterness and a harsh realities that awaited me. The realities were of older gay men who no-longer were attractive or young. Those who spent countless hours "cruising" the parks late at night into the early mornings. Or, those who spent money on a "hustler" for a night of satisfaction. That is some of the realities...there are others - like the many friends I lost to HIV/AIDS.

In 1996, I heard a tape entitled: "Why Should You Be Muslim." Not the Nation of Islam - gotta make that clear. At the end of the tape the speaker said that God will forgive everything except those who set up idols with Him, and then the speaker started naming the sins which God will forgive, and the speaker mentioned and stressed saying "even homosexuality." I was never the same after that.

In 1999, after three years of self turmoil, crying and struggle, I embraced Islam and became Muslim. Today, I am married; and have three children and another due this year. God is truly All-Merciful. I realized that I had taken my own will, my strength, my control and my power and surrendered it. I had created a psychological prison for myself.

There is more to this story that cannot be told now - mainly the reasons why, I wanted to leave the life. And when I first became Muslim the Muslims in Harlem who knew my situation gave me a very hard time. Even my family said it wouldn't last. All the while professing to have belief in God, but keeping God trapped in a box. Many people who "claim" religion like a slogan will tell you God has no place in Religion for someone who made the mistake of homosexuality and that is a serious crime against humanity. The past is the past, the present is here and the future is not guaranteed.

Brothers need to get free of all the mess that's holding us back so that we can begin the process of healing. Humanity has become so dependant on a system of other people's values and majority rule opinions and media that we have surrendered our own self control to make decisions and choices concerning how we live. We are our own worst enemies.

I heard all kinds of negativity mainly from the gay and straight communities after becoming Muslim - things like "Good luck trying to be straight." I wasn't trying to act or be straight. I was being what God created me to be - a Man. That was 6 years ago. It is never ever too late to change. Don't let anybody put that opinion in your mind.

My point of telling my story is because you never hear stories of those black gay men who saw the reality and got out. Life is not about this continuous torment that we put ourselves through. We have to define what a man is according to God not MTV, Rap Stars or sports figures, and that is a very hard reality for the black youth. And that statement is not without merit. I cannot believe how many young Black/Latino men are into this DL and gay sex parties - this is real serious. And they don't care anymore. I was in Atlanta and one guy gave me a flier. I never knew that was going down in these times and with HIV/AIDS. We are truly living in a time of amazement.

And the path is difficult to leave any thing habitual. There is no 12 step program for those who leave the gay life. But it can be done - if that is what you want. I ain't trying to knock nobodies' life as they see it - but that is a piece of my story. Hopefully, someone out there will read and benefit. Let's dialogue!!!

As a gay man of color, i think it is important to ackonwledge that the speakers of this video have their opinions and experiences. however, it should be noted that their experiences do NOT represent the comings out of ALL gay men of color.

My friends and i have had much more positive encounters with our non-gay friends and families. Furthermore, this discussion of Being Black in America should also involve the positive experiences that some of us do have growing into and being men of color.

But, as i initially stated, these are ONLY opinions and personal feelings/statements.

No comment, for this small segment on black men being gay; "it speaks for itself". Only GOD will judge these individual and I will only pray and show love for all GOD creatures.

I totally respect the comments made by the individuals on the video and world wide, be you black, white, hispanic, whatever your nationality is, but the decision to be gay is a choice and not something that came with birth. Whatever your beliefs are that's fine, but the God I serve is not the author of confusion. Just as the young man stated who was over the youth music ministry, after speaking with his Pastor, he decided that he was "straight" and no longer gay. He made a "Choice". I strongly feel that we make decisions and choices based on our circumstances, environment and the people we associate with, which is not always a bad thing. I do not judge the individuals who made these choices however, I do judge the act. Homosecuality is wrong, no matter how you flip it. It is wrong. Our youth today have enough problems in this world, especally if they are people of color.

We need to stop and look at what is considered the "big picture". We need to help one another and for those who don't wish to be helped, pray for them and hope things get better. Everybody at some point in their life has had some trauma, it's a given. But we try to work through it and not chose to do things out of the norm (whatever normal is). Homosexuality is a cope out and a sad excuse to be accepted in society. Stop letting society dictate your life. You weren't born gay, you choose to be gay.

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts. May God bless and keep you.

first of all I like the video.I am in my early twenties, I was born some where in the carribean. I am not out because of my family, they will not have anything to do with me if I come out, One of the reasons, is because of the caribbean culture, gay is not something that is accepted. I heard in your video that you discuss about gay guys who want to have kids and who are religious, I am one of them, but I will not get married. There will be a time in my life where I will stop having relationship with guys for a period of times, in order for me to have kids with a woman. I believe this video should of appear on Bet channel.

A very timely and thoughtful dialogue about and amongst a part of the black community that is often marginalized. A first step to greater understanding and acceptance.
Thank you

My thoughts about the issues raised in the "Being a Gay Black Man" video, are as follows: Black people have a lot of nerve, treating gays like second class citizens. Black heterosexuals discriminate against black gays all the time. If gays don't choose to have children, then thats their business. This should not be anything to feel quilty about. The minister that talked to the young man about his homosexuality was wrong to even address the situation with him. I'm a black female, and I've noticed how the black religious community tries to regulate peoples bedrooms with their opinions. Its time that people stand up and tell them that a persons sexuality is none of their business.

It is unfortunate that the Black community, especially Black Women, do not appreciate people being honest about their sexual identity. If the Black Family and the Church (all Churches) would stop condemning people for their private sexual behavior then maybe alot of this down low and "try-sexual" behavior would diminish and innocent people's lives would not be destroyed.

I felt sad looking at the video. Sad that some of the men felt shame and were rejected by their support network. The people that could help them through the diffacult time of coming out.

I can not understand how a group like black Americans, that have been killed, hated and reject because of who they are, can turn and do the same to members of our own community because they are homosexual.

To answer the question do Jesus loves gays? Yes He does. And for those who heard this before and those who didn't its their life style He hates, you can find this in the Bible in Leviticus 18:22 Where it is written " Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination". Repent because Jesus loves you all so much.
God bless.

I wish that I'd had "role model" conversations like these in my "formative" gay years. I think I would have been able to handle societal streses a lot better.

To: All of you who are "In The Life-style;" of homosexuality or lesbianism.
I know that as a person God loves you because He is your Creator but He doesn't like your lifestyle.
Has living in "The Lifestyle," clouded your judgement of who you really are? God is your Creator and in your mother's womb He wrapped your spirit with flesh--male or female and you entered this earth through birth. There is no one other than God who can do that so when you entered this world, you were either male or female and that can't be changed.
Maybe you were sexually violated or hurt by a family member or friend of the family when you were young. Did that make you a victim? Here is a fact: There is enough hurt in this world that none of us get through life without encountering our share. The difference is how we handle it--if this happened during the early years of life then as adults the opportunity to make a choice of no longer being a victim but to be victorious in life is available.
The choice that you made brought shame on you and your family and friends causing isolation from those whom you love. To all of you who are in "The Lifestyle of homosexualty and lesbianism, you have been lied to by the enemy of your soul, Satan. The devil didn't make you choose your lifestyle but instead lied to you. For God truly loves you and has a good plan for you if you are willing to choose to obey Him. Are you more willing to believe the Lies of Satan who uses people to tell you that God does not love you rather than to believe that God is Love and that He does love you, but doesn't like your lifestyle. Clearly, this lifestyle is the directly opposite of what God is offering you which is a healthy, happy, relationship with someone of the opposite sex. My question to you is: What is wrong with having a healthy, happy relationship with someone of the opposite sex? Do you prefer the shame, guilt, isolation from family members, friends, co-workers and church members and the lies of the devil?
If there is anyone out there who believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for them and would like to give their heart to Jesus, you can ask Jesus to forgive you for your sin and ask Jesus come into your heart and live just like in the Bible, John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life."
To those of you who once gave their heart to Jesus and He became your Savior, He wants you to come back home like the Prodigal Son (Lost Son) in the Bible - Luke 15:11-32 who was rebellious. If you would like to come back home to God just ask God to forgive you and come back home. You do this according to God's Word in 1st John 1:9, "If we confess our sins. He
(God) is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." God loves you and want to give you peace, joy, healing, long-life, happiness, happy, healthy relationships.
My prayer for each one of you, because I care, is that you spend many peaceful and happy years on earth, that you spend eternity with Father God, that you make the right choice and come to or come back to the Lord Jesus Christ making Him your Lord and Savior.

well color dont matter when it comes to the great sin of being gay right down to it God hates it and its abomnation to him he dont hate the person its not that u were born this way those are evil wicked spirits from saten and one way to find out is in the only truth through Gods word
in the old testement GOD rained down fire and brimstone upon sodem and gomara which was very gay and we must rem that God changes not we must seek him and beelive can we ask ourself what would jesus do? do you think he would do that it says that God forbids this sin with man kind i dont hate you but i hate that sin its wicked and you should find a place to repent and ask God to save you

Raymond Boney here, one of the video participants...

Lots to say, and a considerably short window to report in...

Considerable thanks for all who have shared personal stories of success, struggle and perseverance! The response, both here and from other sources, has been overwhelming for all video participants...which is why I write today.

Our hope is that folks are coming back to this "open forum" on a regular basis to be updated on what others have to say and to continue contributing to the dialogue. In subsequent conversations with "the group", we wish to take a more public and inclusive approach to this discussion. We hope in the next few weeks to host an open forum in Washington, DC for those of you who have expressed a desire to be a part of the start of something much larger than can be facilitated in one video presentation...

So, here's the invitation: If you wish to join us in advancing the many topics discussed and not discussed in the WaPo video, please send an email "of interest" to BlackGaySpeak@hotmail.com. In the coming days, after we gauge interest, we will distribute date, time and location information on where our inaugural forum will take place... And, please encourage others to email as well. We have no doubt this exercise will be an enlightening and lively one.

P.S. To our friends in other parts of the country, we hope at some later date to bring the "conversation" to you too! So, please let us know where you are.

It will soon be clear to mankind that regardless of race, one is born either with heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual inclinations.
No one therefore has any moral right to condemn someone who has a sexual inclination different from his own.
Mankind will some day become mature enough to realize that each one of us is to be left free to decide the way that will make him or her happy.

I have just watched the film on "Being a Gay Black Man" and noticed a few things. Some of the men had a hard time looking forward when speaking as if their body lanaguage didn't go with their words. I do agree with the gentleman on the actions of the "down low" brothers not being honest and putting a person in a situation blind. I do not agree that the Gay lifestyle is condone but I also believe that I don't have the right to pick and choose who goes to heaven. I believe all are loved by God and must answer to the higher one within their own spirit. But the question I would like to answer and it is not meant to offend anyone is, if everyone became gay then who would populate the world? Because nature has a male and female of each species to produce offspring. Thus how would a gay union help in the basic process of life? I guess the answer I have already receive is that some people would have to be straight so only certain ones can be gay. I wish you all peace and happiness in your lives.

Hello, i think it's not really bad there in america as it's in Africa or other places. i was born in Uganda and now in UK but still no black person wanna know about gay black people. I personally i don't even have friends because of being gay and to make friends with white gay still not easy. It was a surprise to me to see a collection of you together talking about it. i have never seen such a thing in Black gay society any where. I wish was any where near you maybe you could help me to get more confident about myself. thanks so much for that vidoe. John

Well, I'm writing from Brazil, and I really appreciated these issue raised by Washington Post. Despite the distance, I also face most of the problems pointed in the video. Despite considering myself a successful person, I'm not still able to be an openly gay black man. I'd like to know other people like me. Maybe it's going to help me out in being an openly gay black man.
TX

I am the mom of a gay black man. I knew he was gay when he was at least two years old. The video was very heartwarming to me because it is so important for GBM to be true to themselves. They face unique obstacles. The fact that this group is coming together to discuss their situations and to give each other support is great idea.
Organized religion can be one of the biggest problems for us all. Why should ones sexual preference be denied? It is unfortunate that well intended people are mislead by churches. Very intelligent and educated people are often polarized by the teachings of organized religion.
I encourage this group continues to grow and reach out to otehr GBM.

One issue I felt that the video did not touch on is coming out to your family. Coming out to your parents especially Male blacks is not easy. It sometimes can lead to the end of your family. Teenagers getting put out into the streets. Overall I think the video touched on other gay issues which are good.

Good start. Infringing on other people's safety aside, anyone who thinks people should live a specific way does not understand that we are all first timers in life and we are all dying. We literally live once and there are no do-overs. There is no good reason for anyone to believe someone else knows better than them how they should live their life. What is a man? What is a woman? Merely words. Some of us have penises, some vagina's, some both, some red hair, some black skin. We are beings. Love transcends frivolous words. A black man who loves another black man. What does it mean? Beings can and do love each other. A black man is a being. Another black man is another being. Love is between beings.

I am a beautiful black woman in a loving an healthy relationship with my man. I am glad to see that "black gay" men are finally taking a stand. It is wonderful to see and hear them talk about what it is like being black and gay. Today in our society we have children that are growing up in what I call a "mixed bag," and having persons that are openly gay share their experiences with the world is a great thing. It will be a teaching tool for all of those that are and will be living similiar lifestyles to learn from. My 15 year old daughter has a background on her cell phone that says "Only God Can Judge Me." She told me that "Mom these are words to live by," and I was truly impressed. So with that said, I am saying to all of the gay to community, "Keep on living, and loving" because "Only God Can Judge You."

I think gay black men are hurting the black community. We have enough problems in our community. Now our women end up dating "down-low" brothers or cannot find a decent black man to date because the men are chasing each other.

The only good thing is that gay couples often adopt children that would otherwise be lost in the foster care system. All things considered, children need a home, even if it is a same-sex environment.

I agree with one person's comment. This video only shows one side of the black gay male experience. I hope the Post can delve deeper I too am glad to see men "out" and not on the DL. As a straight African American woman living in Washington, DC my motto is "gay until proven straight" there has been a lot of damage to our relationships because of the DL culture and stereotype. Sadly, the only photo or image of DL men that is potrayed is of a Black man.

I, as another black man who is gay and lives in DC, do appreciate the video piece posted on the site. Although I felt that the piece as a whole lacked focus, I did like the fact that it did hit on one of the most relevant issues for gay black men, and that is their struggle with the black church. The community of the black church has always been seen by it's members as an extended family, offering great support when needed. Unfortunatley, the church community in large part, has continually alienated the black GLBT community. That alienation has led me to keep my own spirituality to very private practice. And in losing that support, I find it very sad that being not only that I have struggled enough as being a DOUBLE-minority member of society, that only half of my fight has been conquered, that I still must leave what I feel makes up a large part of me crouching, and hiding in the dark.

I think it was a great editorial. I think it is a great outlet for the gay community especially the black gay community to have an outlet.

I think that is really important dialogue. As a black female it is important to me that blacks in America can give themselves and their brothers and sisters the freedom to be who they are. Not only does it help them in having a format to be real in who they are, but it helps the AA community, in general, which is in need of REAL dialogue.

As I read the posts of so many saying how seeing gay men is sad, I appreciate that honesty - and that is also why I have to commend gay black men that come out. It strikes me as funny when they discuss their sadness - it seems to outline the idea that gay men ruin their ideals. Well that is just it...they are YOUR ideals, based on YOUR spiritual beliefs, your God. Not everyone has your God or believes what you believe.

I understand how in the face of adversity, racism we as blacks have to come together to support one another - so do it people. We are not monolithic. We like to think we are, but we're not and the sooner we realize this, the faster we will move forward.

I think church is wonderful for the community, but as a Black woman I find myself searching for a good church that is more willing to say "I don't know" sometimes, rather than make up an answer that causes people to feel superior to others. Sometimes it feels like black churches are a way to pressure blacks into not questioning anything about themselves and their socialization - otherwise your not having faith, or your not being black.
People need to stand up and be who they are and break out of group think. Moving as a group has its power and its limitations.

To just commend the Black and well intelligent black homosexual men. I am a black heterosexual female and i embrassed the thought of our men being just who they were born to be. I am love the fact that you are now confident and well relaxed about who you are, I take my hat and off to you and i hope it is the start of something new and i hope you all can break the silence that lies and the stories untold about black and homosexual. Congratulations Guy

Let me first begin by saying that God is Love and as Christians we are taught to love and spread love with each other regardless of race, gender, sexual behavior, and religion. But lets not confused the issue of acceptance with love. I do agree that there are many of us don't pass along God's word in a loving and tactful manner. Because I am lead by my Holy Spirit and my Spirit so happens to agree with the teachings that tell us that homosexuality is an abomination to God and is against the natural order of God. Again, it is the Holy Spirit that guides my belief. It does not take away my love for my Brothers and Sisters in Christ and its not my issue to tell them what there destiny is. I, as a Christian do have an obligation to bring truth to my Brothers and Sisters in Christ so when I am confronted with questions or lead by my Holy Spirit to spread the Gospel of Jesus I try to obey. I too have done and been out of God's devine will and others have continue to love me by not focusing so much on my sinful doings but looking at my heart and my purpose as a Christian. Lets try to heal our Brothers and Sisters by loving them unconditionally but yet don't compromise the truth as we are lead by our Holy Spirit. Amen.

I would like to say that homossexualism is a sickness and sinful condition of human being.
And God hates the sin but not the sinner and Jesus died for all men.
Ask God for help, He is mercyfull God. Look for a church that teachs about the powerfull word of God.
God bless

i thought that it was nice seeing a segment of the black population that is viewed/treated so harshly by america and by their own heterosexual counterparts come together to address the issues that they feel are important.

"Being a Gay Black Man" video spoke volumes of truth and honesty. This is a very prevalent topic today in America. These are merely people like you and me who just happen to have a different sexual preference. These men want to have children, want to be positive role models in their community, and furthermore be accepted and live life like everyone else. The problem I have and other black women or whomever may have is when black men are not honest about their sexuality and later expose their partner to lies and possible diseases. This is not to say that all gay males have STD's or are HIV positive but being honest from courtship is the right and better approach to have. "Being a Gay Black Men," plays on a lot of the macho personae that they mostly like to portray. I am assuming that most men in denial about their sexuality want to keep up this masculine personae and therefore continue to live very unhappy lives and feel as though they have to wear a mask everyday. It will be long before acceptance comes to full fruition.

I can't get too concerned about a segment of our population that wishes to endure ridicule simply because of self gratification. Being gay in America is not a black thing or white thing, itis a choice thing and nothinh more.

I've been reading the series from time to time, but this issue has really brought saddness to my heart. I can't believe there are so many Black men who are gay.
I personally know gay men that i absolutely like alot as a person. However, i do have a problem envisioning men with men let alone Black gay men. I do believe in the Bible and i don't believe that being a homosexual is any different from any other sin. But i think the Bible sort of insinuate men being with men or women being with women is detestable. But i rather that Black men came out and speak the truth about themselves rather than hiding then blaming others who openly express their dislikes.
Atleast they are being truthful.

As a Latina woman of African descent, I applaud this open dialogue on the subject of being Gay and Black in America. I also applaud the courage of the men who engaged in this discussion. I agree with the statement that being different does somehow teach one tolerance. Finally, I am convinced that if we tell the truth, if we are capable of demonstrating our personal and professional success, our vulnerabilities, our humanity and our spirituality, we can somehow teach that each and everyone of us is valuable as contributing members of our families and communities. Thank you for this timely discussion.

The Definition of Race
In reference to classifying the human species, race is now under dispute among modern biologists.
The human race, as a species, is a group of beings that are not able to breed with anything other than in its own kind, just as birds can't breed with cows, fish can't breed with elephants and so on. We the human race can breed with any culture. Human race is sadly devolving, regressing at such an alarming rate it is scary. We as a people live on the same planet, in which divide and conquer has been the law since the dawn of time and before. This planet has done what it always has done - selected us for extinction. The leading scientists today are sounding the alarm saying planetary destruction is imminent. Yet, we still hold on to our religion of divide and conquer as if it will save us.
One would think that in over 2000 years, we would have evolved to the level of awareness of the planet's needs not our own. But don't be mistaken the planet is doing what it is supposed to do. It is eliminating the source of destruction that inhabits it like a bad virus or germ. Just like all things in nature, our bodies, are set up to eliminate all germs or viruses naturally. We still keep on with divide and conquer like it will save us. Martin Luther King said he wanted to be a part of a world where color was not the concern of any man, but sadly this is farther from being true now than in King's day.
The black culture and Latino culture, and all of the rest, still divide and point the finger at everyone else as the problem. I talk to people at church, and they tell me as a black man I need to be aware of the black people in history, and yet if you were to ask them what they are doing to perpetuate this human race or better the world in which we live you get "Columbus had a black mother." What are you doing today, you will get the same old song and dance: White man is holding me down; the world sees me as black. Ask if they would marry or date or even befriend a person of a different color, you get more racist propaganda than you did in the days of communism. If you were to tell them that they see color more than the white man, you would get a violent reaction or something close to it.
Ignorance is monumental in today's society. We have a world in which we have B.E.T, Spanish channels, Asian channels, and on and on in America. I don't have any problem with different cultures, or communities. That is beautiful - the differences that we have to celebrate and not hold on to like a religion that will save us because it won't. The most bigoted people haven't even been outside their own town. If they had, they might find more to celebrate and less to divide us and stir up hate. If half the white supremacists found out some of their ancestors were a different color, they would cut their own throats. For what? Ignorance is the call, the mantra, the reality of today.
Not real truth - "The Jews were black." Who cares? When all is said and done, we still have one planet we live on that has decided to let us follow the plight of the dinosaur: EXTINCTION
But we won't change. We have to play "King of the Hill;" I am better than you; you are lesser than me. Don't get me wrong I have been racially profiled like anyone. I can't get a cab in New York, London, Stockholm, on and on. I have been pulled over for being black and told I fit the description of someone who just committed a crime. I have been pulled over and had my friends asked if I was holding them hostage. I have had black people walk up to me and my wife and child and tell me I am a faggot for having a so-called white wife. I have had black people tell me I was with the Great White Satan (my wife), to my face, and only God and my wife kept me from killing them on the spot. There is a relative of mine, who has 5 kids from 5 different men . She was telling me about the death of my grandmother and thought it necessary to make racial slurs about my children - God bless her. This sort of ignorance is not fun. Yet, I have not allowed this to be the defining theme of my life.
Life is not a dress rehearsal, it is the real thing. The media has made large sums of money off of our ignorance though, pitiful as it is. Divide and conquer, a very old practice, that is in action today will be man's destruction. The Middle East, Europe, Somalia, Rwanda, Indonesia - these are just the latest pictures of the age-old cultures that have fallen victim to the bloodlust of divide and conquer.
Still we have been duped, by the media, which sees our ignorance as its profit. I have been called a black bastard, a nigger, an eggplant, a porch monkey, just to name a few. Yet this is not enough to limit me to the plight of ignorance that our planet is so accustomed to. This kind of thinking is common. It is in the churches, synagogues, temples, and in every bar, restaurant, and store. Lack of thought is too easy, too common, and is taking us spiraling ever downward. The beauty of the reality is that there is no difference in our race too big to overcome. We can mate with any culture on this planet, and it is not a problem for God, so why should it be a problem for us? This is a scientific fact that there is no biological difference in our anatomy. I can't buy this different race theory because it simply is not true or relevant. not because I say so but because it just simply is not true. I am tired of people justifying their own inadequacies by bringing something so trivial so short-sighted as color of skin into the equation. That is just sad, small-minded backward thinking. This kind of thinking will not and cannot move us as a people ahead, or out of the self-imposed dark ages that we cherish so much. This kind of thinking is moving this planet down a dark and self-destructive path. It is sad that we live in a so-called evolved society. Still suffering from this as a people on this big rock that is floating in space fragile and delicate as we really are, I don't have any answers but can only pray for the mercy of God and hope for the best.

As a white woman in a relationship with a black woman, I can say that I've seen the prejudice in the black community towards gays and lesbians. She will probably always be in the closet with her family because they'd never accept her. Just the fact that she is in her mid twenties, never dated and is not married was enough suspicion for her family to constantly shadow her. I can only imagine how much worse it is for gay black men.

First of all, being a Black Man is hard enough. But to add Gay along with being a Black man, that just open doors for a lot of negativity. Being a Gay Black Man sets himself up for society to have another excuse to tear them down. I respect the gentlemen in the video for standing strong and supporting each others beliefs, as to who they are. Black men, straight or gay, be proud of what you are and who you are. No one has the right to judge you by your color or sexual orientation. Continue to be strong and continue to be proud of who you are, and keep up the fight until you get the respect you deserve.

what scared me is some gays talking about raising children!!! the last time I checked it was impossible for two people of the same gender to give birth...
People are free to be gay but please don't even think about children.

Excellent. As a straight white man really enjoyed hearing about other mean's sexual and religious tensions.

lET'S ALL AS BLACK MEN, REALZIE, WE MUST BE SMARTER, MOVE MORE QUICKLY, THINK MORE COMPASTIONATELY, BE ALERT AT ALL TIMES, RUN FASTER, JUMP HIGHER, LOVE EACH OTHER MORE PASSIONATELY, CLING TO OUR FAMILES, SUPPORT EACH OTHER, RESPECT EACH OTHER, AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, PRAY FOR AND WITH EACH OTHER. PERHAPS THEN, THE POWER THAT WE WILL GET FROM ALL OF THE ABOVE WILL STRENGTHEN US AS BLACK MEN.

I love the video on "Being a Gay Balck Men"
I think that is a topic ofter skipped over.
I agree that gay men are able to love, to honor, to cherish that which is important to us, just like every one else.
we have families and relatioships like the next man and women, so why being gay will prevent that from happening?
sones sexuality doesn't determine the length of time their relationships will last or whether they should have kids or not. You guys did a great job in presenting the issues that are so relevant in today's world.

Its funny how things find you and you don't plan on finding things. What I mean is, I was just messing around on the computer and by some way or some how came across this video clip. I must say it is going to change my life forever. I am a young 22 year old black male living in the city of Philadelphia and I feel discourage to tell my friends and my family that I could be a Homosexual. Its is such a taboo in the black community that is look apon as being such a negative. To here the stories of these men in this video clip; I feel that I am not alone! If anything, I want to be comfortable with myself. Maybe someone with here my voice!

I would like to commend these brothers for coming out as gay men, however, what about all of the men on the DL in the black community that are not open and spreading HIV to our women. This is the issue that needs to be discussed. Washington, DC and many of our urban cities have more new HIV cases then some third world countries. What I have heard from some of my gay male friends is that it is "tough enough being a black man in society, but add the world gay too it and you have an whole other dynamic." You have to worry about being excommunicated by your family, friends, coworkers, etc. so you have people that pretend to be heterosexual and marry to please their family and society. Unfortunately, it's the wife and kids that suffer in the situation. You have some women that suspect it but need the extra income so they turn a deaf ear and close an eye. You have some that are totally clueless and don't know until they end up HIV or sick. I would like to say to the DL brothers just don't marry or mess anyone's life up because of your selfishness. When you try to have your cake and eat it too someone always get's hurt. You don't have to wear the rainbow colors and march in gay pride day but just leave us alone! Don't complicate a black woman's life anymore than we have it. We have to keep the family together on many issues. We have to help provide for the family, pick up the kids, go to school, keep confusion down, fight for a promotion, fight for our respect, cook, clean, be a mother, wife, lover, etc. and then you're gonna treat us like this! It's not fair - we love you black men but be fair to us. Historicially and traditionally, many black women have held it down for the brothers even when we are disrespected, lied and cheated on we still have your back! Black women are traditionally very loyal to our black men. Please, please don't do this to your our women because many of you have mothers, sisters, cousins, and friends that you love and respect. How would you feel if someone did this to your mother or sister?

This morning I told a lie. I called my boss and told her I was ill. The truth is, I wasn't sick at all -- my boyfriend had the day off and I was feeling a bit "randy." Sure, I felt guilty about lying, but it passed.

This may be a little too much information, but I use this example to counter the argument that because one is gay he's a sinner, and because he's a sinner, he ought to be rejected. You see, we all sin in different ways. This morning, I not only lied, I fornicated (geez... feeling some real guilt now that I see it spelled out). Am I a better Christian by virtue of the fact that I'm not gay? Are there small sins and big sins? I would argue that, ultimately, a sin is a sin. Live and let live, because YOU have no authority over the matter.

iloved this piece. as a open black gay male living in usa i think we are so poorly misrepresented and underrepresented. it just proves everybody wrong. we are people plain and simple. people who want love and family and everthing that makes people people.

I am very happy and comforted to see that the concerns and issues facing Black gay men have been included in this discussion about Black men in America. So often the contributions and very existence of Black gay men and the Black gay community are overlooked, discredited and at times unreasonably vilified. This video touches on several issues facing not just the Black gay community, but the Black community as a whole. The video highlights the fact that there needs to be more dialogue among Black gay men as well as between gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual Black people. This is evidenced by what the media would like to portray as a Black, urban phenomena known as the "down-low". Being on "the DL" is not something that is exclusive or particular to Black (gay) men but it is an issue that should be and needs to be addressed by the Black community as a whole. Not to make excuses for anyone (gay, straight, Black, White, Asian, or otherwise) who cheats on their spouse but we must ask ourselves, is it any wonder why a person who is faced with the very real threat of being ostracized by their family, friends and religious community because of their sexual orientation would lie about and to themselves? One must also ask where the failure to openly and honestly discuss sexuality leaves us when facing the global pandemic of AIDS. There is no denying that gay Black men have played an integral part in the lives of many Black Americans (whether we want to believe it or not). Just look at our churches, in our homes, and even in the rights we now enjoy as Americans (Bayard Rustin...hello?) There are many facets to the Black community and we as a community should make more of any effort to see that that diversity is shown, understood, and respected.

God's Love is Addictive Love: Maceo Parker Life on Planet Groove
I do not know for I am not Gay. I do know that many blacks take offense to any comparisons of discrimination between race and sexual orientation. I can only imagine that it must be hell on earth for black gay men. LESSON OF THE HERMAPHRODITE. One fine Sunday years ago, I attended services at a church in S.E. D.C. I was invited to Bible discussion before the start of services. Something I had never participated in before. It was warm and congenial until the issue of Gays came up. I was visit this church. My church home at the time was in Greenbelt, MD. There were a number of Gay Parishioners at this church along with a Female Priest. Very progressive. A solid Church, with solid members. Anyway, I refused to condemn the gay lifestyle as a choice. It occured to me at that critical moment in the heated discussion to bring the example of Hermaphrodites as gender role diversity in God's Creation. Well, that resulted in citation of the usual scriptures condeming Gays. My reply was that the sexual orientation may have just been incidental to the lesson and the infidelity, or wantoness is certainly not specific to gays. More references until I stated that scripture may not be correct and that Commandments do not list Gay Lifestyle as a sin. These protestants are basically have Two Commandments: 1. Love thy God with all thy heart, mind, soul, and optionally strength. 2. Love they neighbor as thyself. My opponents went old school on me, and in my temporary confusion took advantage of a bogus point. To my surprise, there was a long time Hermaphrodite in the Congregation, also in the discussion, who spoke up strongly as the devil's advocate. I thanked this soul, and expressed my admiration of his/her strength to worship in such a hostile environment. When our eyes met, I perceived a flash of white light from this soul. I attended the service, until a message of confusion over commandments was entered into the sermon. At that time I wrote a check for $77.77, deposited it in the plate and left the building, never to return. Here endeth the lesson. President Bush needs to clean his administration up. The pseudo-cons
are unamerican and I will have nothing more to do with them. The Washington Post is heavily infiltrated with their kind.
I leave it to you. I am going to the NYTimes. Friends, please keep in touch and id yourselves if you contact me basa78@juno.com Been fun. Play time is over. Take care and may God Bless you all.

Being a Black Man is a WONDERFUL series. I love the fact that they have included black men who are gay. My only concern is that people like me have not been represented....the black man who is gay and masculine.

I am a heterolsexual black man and i also am a christian. I don't condone homosexuality like i don't condone lying, adultery, murder, etc. What i really like about this segmant is that they gave their honest and true confession. Many people today are still running from the truth about themselves and most attempt to hide behind society's standards of what man or woman should be. We get confused and very strict on labeling others while forgetting our own shortcomings. It's easier to shift the blame but the one thing i saw from these guys is what God wants all of his people to learn to do and that is CONFESS!

I was not in the least bit impressed with the video. I feel its producers corralled as many unthreatening, ostensibly educated and cultured gay black men as would fit into that nice little suburban home they chose for a location to present an "acceptable face" of homosexuality to their REAL intended audience: heterosexual viewers.

The producers conveniently neglected to include in their discussion the many homo-thugs, down low deceivers, and philandering husbands -- not all of whom, presumably, are as "presentable" as the men chosen to be featured in the piece -- that also make up a significant portion of the gay black male population. They also failed to touch on the ever-present AIDS problem within the gay community.

In short, this video is a concerted effort to present the gay lifestyle as something completely normal and innocuous -- as something not to be feared, let alone opposed. Potentially thorny issues such as anal sex, fisting, BDSM, pornography, rampant promiscuity, drug use, and STDs that characterize much of this community, are carefully sidestepped in favor of an unholy hodgepodge of it's-really-awesome-being-gay fables, hollow pleas of "acceptance", and absurd hard-luck tales of religious alienation.

If a make-believe, sugar-coated, Pleasantville depiction of an inherently deviant lifestyle is what passes these days for honest journalism, than this piece of blatant propaganda is a runaway success.

Let me congratulate you ,plural. for having a group that allows men to vent their feelings. the word says, CONFESS THY FAULTS ONE TO ANOTHER, PRAY YE ONE FOR ANOTHER THAT YOU MAY BE HEALED''. SO many times black men don't have the outlets they need to express themself. Thus you all have made it possible. the word also says'',WE ARE THE GLORY OF GOD.'' therefore, we are to live unto that as much as we can. Jesus was the express image of his father.WHAT was it- his love, power, majesty, radiance as the sun to shine. Our lives must be an example to the point of light which brings about truth for us to live. With out it we are in darkness and we lie. And Jesus is no ie unto his father. People cannot come out in their sins in some aspect. others can . IT IS MADE OBVIOUS OR KNOWN,; CLEAR. TO BE THAT WAY. The light is truth. it is also the power to reveal unto GOD, SECONDLY AND TO PEOPLE FIRST. GOD ALREADY KNOWS , YET , FOR PEOPLE TO NOT BE DECIEVED HE REVEALS IT AND FOR THEMSELVES OVERALL. DO NOT BE DECIEVED BY TH E DECEPTION OF OUR SINS WE MAKE FOR OURSELVES. AND INCURED BY OTHERS RELATIONSHIP. lET US LIVE AS much in peace with ourselves then with others. alot of people are in peace at all. they are tormented by their ouwn non acceptance to live with it. GOD DID NOT REMOVE THE THORN IN PAUL'S ''FLESH' THUS HE PRAYED 3 TIMES. MY GRACE IS SUFFICIENT. IT IS ENOUGH TO SUSTAIN AND KEEP US WHILE WE LIVE.God sent JESUS TO HEAL THEM AND DELIVER THEM OUT OF THEIR DESTRUCTION '' PS.107;20 destruction means, ruin. i am not ruin by my sins for they shall not have no more dominion over me.'' I AM SAVED''. homosexuality can be any form of sickness, mental disorder, birth inheritance, or other inflictions, curse ; TO NOT GET FROM UNDER, OPPRESSION AS OTHER ELEMENTS OF SOCIET. So as I end this, live unto God, and let God's love and his peace rule in your hearts.

It's awesome to began to have this type of real dialogue among our brothers. I would like to see some form of community programming developed as a result of this type of dialogue that deals with the dark side of being a black gay men in America and the ramifications that has had on the black community in general.

It's good to hear black men talk openly about being gay. I have close friends that are gay and I have friends who are not openly gay due to fear of being rejected by family and friends.
God loves us all and gay people should never think otherwise. However, we all must read and understand God's word and what he wants for us. God does not hate Gay People. We all fall short of God's glory and will be judged by him only.

I find it absolutely amazing that we've grown enough to engage in conversation around being black and male in America. I find it all the more encouraging that we even appear to be interested in the lives of Gay Black Men. With all of our greatness & potential, and through all of our struggle, it is most disheartening when we allow ignorance perpetuated by our own silence to closet us as a people.

As I watched the video clip I could only imagine the promise that is offered to a people who are willing live as they are, and by so living, free humanity to experience a deeper capacity for love.

In my life experience, I too have grappled with the conundrums of sexuality & religion, race & masculinity, and I've come to know that the answer to all of my questions rest upon the notion that "I am fearfully and wonderfully made."

I embrace the progress that we have made (with efforts like this video) as I look forward to the conversations of our future when Black Men representing the full breadth of who are (dynamic, bold, beautiful, loving, intelligent, strong, gay, straight, and otherwise ALIVE, are able to sit and talk and understand and better define what it mean to be a Black Man in America. I welcome the opportunity to participate.

I wanted to address the young man that mentioned that he was in the church as a music leader and mentioned to his pastor that he is a homosexual man, or to anyone that might be reading this with or without certainity of whom and whose you are. Please read on: I first want to say that as a Believer of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, our first call is to love each other and in love I believe that it may have been the pastor intention to protect you from decieving lies from the enemy that will destroy relationship with the Father. Especially since you said that you loved the Lord and serving Him by playing music. It's my observation that the enemy was jealous. God certainly loves all of us. That is why He sent His son to die for all sin. And since I can hear that you feel seperated from the love of God that I hope you can see with your spiritual eyes that, THAT is not God "THAT" meaning His will and the THAT meaning lifestyle. It is not pleasing cause if it was it would draw you closer to Him. That is of the enemy and his plot against your life. It's not my opinion just let His word convince you not man's understanding He's the only ONE that you need to please. Please read in the Bible Romans 1:17-32 it will bring clarity to areas of this matter and allow the Holy Spirit to clease and minister to wounded areas that the enemy sowed seeds and watch God restore the areas of your life and align and position your to glorify Him in the heavens and on earth as he prepares your destiny for eternal life. God said in His word that if you love me you will follow His commands, his laws and that is doing what simply pleasing in His sight by putting aside our ways and the sins of the world. He just ask that you come as you are and he will do the work in you and I. He is Love and the lover of your soul. Read Romans 10:9-10. By praying a prayer announcing your salvation or rededication of your life back to Him by saying Eternal Father, I know you love me, I want to love you more and more. Show me how to do just that I thank you for sending your only son to die for my sin and raising him from the dead letting me know that you have all power in your hands to restore and heal dead situations in my life. This day I believe all these things in my heart and confess with my mouth that you are Lord over my life and thank you for eternal and everlasting life with you Father. Allow me to read your word and know who I am in you. Give me a new identity make me over again and show me how to walk and talk like you. Place a hedge of protection round me and annoint me with the blood of Jesus this day forth, I ask all these things knowing that by faith I will receive them in Jesus Holy Name, Amen.
To God be the Glory in Heaven and on Earth for ever and ever.

The video was excellent. It should haave been longer so that way I could see if they had tackled more issues that face black gay men in America. My lover and i are both black an we are in the process of having children. We live in the Atlanta area.

Excellent job. This type of series needs to be publicized more to create an environment of understanding rather than hate. Thanks

I believe that we have freedom of choice and that is what heterosexual, homosexual and being lesbian is, a choice. I do believe that if you use God as your guide , that it is very clear as to what God considers to be Godly in respect to relationships. No He (God) doesn't hate homosexuals, or people who have pre-marital sex (hetereosexuals) or even murderers. But He does hate sin and according to Gods word homosexual practices are an ambomination just like any other sin. We can't justify murder or pre-marital sex to suit our lifestyles just like we can in no way justify homosexuality. I love all people no matter what lifestyle that they choose and I cannot pass judgement on someones elses choice, I myself do things contrary to what God says is right. But I take a good self inventory of the things that I know that He wouldn't be pleased with and pray that I find the strength to live the way that God not society would have me to live.

I thought the piece was a great beginning. The fact that slavery was able to continue for so long is largely because of the inability of one segment of the human population to empathize with another. Black america can only heal and move forward by each of us living our own personal morals and respecting and empathizing with the "other" and all their differences (moral and otherwise).

I am a physician of caribbean descent who came out to my parents at 19 as a bisexual. my twenties, I have spent in long term relationships with men (3 to be exact). my "lifestyle" for the most part has always been of a young physician: I work eighty hours a week, I come home and study and have fun with friends and family. I have remained close with my family through all of my twenties. It always irritates me when anyone refer to the gay "Life" as if just because one is attracted to the same sex, it means your lifestyle is driven by the finding of same-sex encounters.

Now that I am entering into my thirties, I am looking for a relationship with someone with whom I can have a family of my own (adoption, surrogacy, however it is possible) and with someone with whom I can enjoy my current family (mom, dad and siblings). Looking at the dysfunction rampant among "gay" men, I sometimes get a little jaded. Although sexually I am not as attracted to women, I also recognize that a spiritual relationship with ANYONE (man or woman) is inevitably going to have sexual compromises and I have started to seriously reconsider dating women.

What gives me pause is that I am not ashamed of my self-actualization as a gay man. I don't see my gay identity as a simple "choice". In a world in which each of us has several "identities" ( i am caribbean, black, physician, post-gay, lover of literature, etc), we can certainly chose to express (or cover) our identities in different ways. I still believe that in an ideal world free of bigotry, I would be happy to be with a man enjoying my family, maybe adopting a few children of my own. But the world is not ideal and unfortunately at this time in history, too many years of a gay man's life is spent accepting and then exploring his sexuality which leaves very little time for incorporating his sexuality into a full spiritual life. Some of us have already moved on...I have this ONE LIfe and many things I want to enjoy.

So ultimately its time for us to move to a post-gay world in which we love ourselves and then get onto living a spiritual and just life the best way we can in this REAL world we live in.

I thought this was fabulous. Young people given that I'm 55. But it is a nice thing. It would be nice to have a cross generational same gender loing Black men conversation also. I hear that this is a year old. Hire a psychodramatist to facilitate it. Not me I suggest Milton Hawkins (who is not gay but is Black and the cross cultural effect could be good,)

why must we be black gay and open. can we just live without telling everyone that we are gay. who cares. no one but out gay men. who we are and who we have sex with or no have sex is between you and that person. I have had sex with men and women and that is what I like. let us work on our blackness. enough about the dl brother and the open brother. next subject

This video snippet reaffirmed all that I had ever believed to be the absolute truth about being a Black gay man in America. Seldom is there ever this type of real-life discussion ever displayed for others to witness. These participants were well-spoken and educated. Typically, we are shown just the opposite.

Hello I am from Venezuela in South America not black (Latin), but we all have the same process when we tell everyone "I am gay" I did it when I was 18 and let me tell you it was not easy, I was at least 10 years waiting for my parents positive answer to let me talk to them, now our society its not so different, here doesnt exist gay rights, being gay its not a crime, watching this video tells me that there are people who can help anothers so I hope that maybe in the future here we are going to have positive people accepting others.

I believe this was without a doubt something that I would love to see as an ongoing video series. I was quite impressed as a Gay Black Man in Pittsbugh and in my late 50's to hear and see a group of Gay Black Men of varying ages sitting and discussing the issues that were discussed. I was sorry it was so short. Has someone thought of submitting this concept to LOGO, PBS or In the Life? I would love see more. Please tell me there is going to be more.

I feel fine because I made a decision to live my life,this means to adopt a child- he was adopted at 4 weeks old and is now 11.I felt because I am black and gay this did not and will not stop me from feeling whole,complete, or less then. You have to take matters into your hands and mold your life as you perceive it to be,listen to your enter voice,and grow as a human being and nothing less,you must believe in yourself.

It was a good break through and we need a whole lot more of these dialogues. Thanks for doing this.

It's amazing that in 2007 the US is still not accepting people for who they are. Especially since our troops travel the world trying to make others accept those that are different from themselves. I look forward to the day that people are judged by their character and not who they sleep with (unless it is with a child or other person that has no control over the decision).

My heart went out to the young man who was a musician in his church. He said that his pastor pulled him aside to talk with him on his sexual practices and even classes to assure him(the pastor)that he was straight. How ludicris! Homosexuality is a sinful practice, right along with men and women, both young and old, that practice with ease and no consicense sexual relations without marriage and many married people practice adultery and there is no condemnation. That would probably be about 2/3 of his congregation that is openly practicing sexual immorality and his concern was a personal dislike of the practice of homosexuality.

Leviticus 18:22(Living Word Translation)says,"Do not practice homosexuality;it is a detestable act". And right along with that practice is the wrongful acts of sex between relatives, animals and the practicing of prostitution.

Another comment that bothered me was the man who said his mother called him on the phone and told him he was gay and he began to immediately practice, on her say so!
But how many people, out of ignorance, have told their sons that they were gay, because of their perception of their son's behavior or society's perception on what a boy should do or a girl should do. The whole matter is that if you are sent into this world with a penis, this is no rocket science...you are in a role of a man, which is honor and a priviledge to be given this leadership role and you don't have to figure it out that the woman is your natural mate. And vise versa for the woman.

The problem come up when a man or woman do not want to take on their natural sexual roles and want to abandon and change their natural role and position in society and in the world. They want to present the argument that they were "born" to perform sexual acts on their own gentre or sex. Therefore, suggesting that "God" or the bible has made a mistake or that "God" is indeed not perfect, because if He was, than how could he miss the fact that he created them to be gay and yet conflict with His very creation and his own word by condemning their practice as a sin.

People who practice homosexuality are participating in something they know is wrong, but out of the guilt and shame and wanting to fit "in", they (as a group) pulled together to push this theory that their "sin" has been miscaterorize and that the world got it wrong. They are just regular people with normal problems like everyone else and how they have sex is just fine. And really, it is fine. But stop trying to push that the practice of homosexuality is "not" a sin on the religious community. The Bible declares it is, and includes it within its sexual immorality and sexual impurties boundaries. And as long as the Bible says it is, and as long as people want to go to heaven and live the life that the Bible says they should live in order to go to heaven, than it is the Bible that has the last say so. No Man can make straight what God has made crooked.

I am sadden to see that black men are falling for a trick of the spirit of darkness. Our black men use to be highly respected as it related to his manhood. We were always taught to respect our bodies and who we are! The brothers in the video all appear to intelligent men, but they are all mislead. Just think about it. Man is the most intelligent living being; yet of all the various species, humans are the only one that the same sex come together to practice same sex sexual interactions. Even a dog will not allow another of the same sex to tamper with him in his most private area. This is not natural. But yet,humans says it's okay. When both, male and females practice this behavior, without trying, their overall demeanor changes. Those individuals will have to want to know the true way in this manner, and will want to find out!
This will have to be done for themselves! My hope is that they find the way before it's too late.

I realy would have liked to see the full discussion, it realy should have should more. Five minutes is not enough time to discuss this issue. There should be more things like this. People need to see these types of things to create more exposer for openly gay "people" to talk, but there should have been more types of gay men there like as "DL" guys. Society is so one sided on this issue and it is because there is not a strong venue for is to be brought up in an enviornment were gay people can speak for themselves.

I greatly appreciated this clip and commentary on Being A Black Man - Gay in America. I especially felt the compassion discussed and shared by these strong brave black men. A lesson to be learned by those on the outside looking in. These men don't represent the few - they represent the majority. Very well done documentary.
I look forward to a follow up!

I applaude my brothers for sharing some of their hopes, dreams and fears with me. Being the youngest of three children, growing up in a Christian home, it was always taught that homosexuality was a sin, but all are God's children and He loves us all. Sin is sin. Sex outside of marriage, stealing, lieing. It's all sin. None is more or less offensive to God that the other. None of us are perfect, but we strive for perfection through Him. No matter how hard that we may try, we still fall short of perfection. Because of this video, I will no longer be silent among gay bashers. It's fear that causes gay bashing and those of of that remain silent often feel that it's not our fight. As a Believer, I now feel that I have not choice but to speak out. Not because it's my fight, but, it's the right thing to do. Your voice should be heard to help remove the fear. Fear that we might "catch it" or one of our friends or a family member may be gay. Continue to use any and all mediums to educate us until you are treated as deserve to be treated.
Theresa
Your Sister in Christ

Being black is your race but being gay is your soul in turmoil. Black americans have a choice to either do something with their lives or go to a corner, sale drugs, wear baggy pants, shoot innocent people by robbing them and all other crimes that exist today mostly by them. They have a choice! They can say to themselves, I am going to do something about my future! Gay individuals have it harder, because their spirit is constantly fighting with their soul. Most of them don't want to be gay, but their vile vices put them in bondage. The best comparison example to them are vampires. Without the blood the vile hunger will not leave their temple and they kill for it. Gay people's soul have been invaded at birth or just some astray bad wandering spirit entered at a later age their soul. The desire is so strong that their body fights within the invaders and loses the battle. Adding to the vice by being black does not help the situation. Pity is the word for transexal, cross dresser and others that are held in this bondage by the evil forces. May the Light go into them when they find God. I know that I found God-I am sure they will too.

When I began to view the video the first thing right out of the box was that there were no older gay men, sixtyish or so, unless some of the participants looked young for their age. Including some of them might widen the spectrum of the discussion, since that generation predates the age of civil rights and openness and can give insight into how they have lived their lives and overcome the fears and challenges they were faced with.

The message so commonly expressed by homosexuals and hetrosexuals is that God does not love people who are gay. That is so far from the Gospel of Jesus Christ. God spoke against homosexuality behavior and consistently deams it "an abomination," however, he loves the person regarless. Therefore, serving God is about surrendering the will yea your life totally to Him. We can't do what we want in life then say to God, "You better accept me!" God has standards, His word is clear but character is love. We need to come to that reality that Christ has to replace self. To my homosexual brothers, God has a place for you in his Kingdom however,you ,like all of us, must surrender your will and allow Christ to restore in you his original plan. "God is able to do above all that you ask or think." It is not for me to say to you that hell is your destination however, if we go against the clear, "Thus says the Lord . . . then the wages of going against God's word is death. My prayer is that you allow God to have control in your life and not allow the church or a man to discourage your walk with Christ. Thats what the devil wants. God wants to save mankind. My prayers is not just for homosexuals but for all people, God is love . . . He died to save us FROM our sins, not save us IN our sins.

I really appreciate the video. I would love to obtain the video for the presented dialogue and if there is more. I could use it on my college campus for dialogue. LGBTQ of color is a highly neglected group in both struggles for peopel of color and LGBTQ communities. More dialogue and programs need to be developed, not just for African Americans, but other people of color communities.

Sincerely,
Fleurette King

I just viewed the video and I thought it was very interesting. Even though, I couldn't understand the majority of the content of what's being said -- I could feel their struggle and the yearning for acceptance in Modern America. I am a Deaf gay black man and I would say I am educated as well -- graduated from college in DC. In some ways, the gay black men have an advantage because they aren't deaf, whereas I am. The fact, that I am deaf, gay, and black -- I would have to struggle 3 times more than an average gay black man -- truly, that's my opinion, but that's how I feel. And I find it interesting that I relate more to the Deaf community than to the black community solely based on communication. How could I have a dialogue with someone who doesn't know ASL (American Sign Language)? Not only that, the Deaf community are very open and welcoming toward the minorities groups within the community, but like I said, it's solely based on my experiences and opinions.

I hope one day they will do a feature on what's like to be a deaf gay black man in the "Being a Black Man" series.

Thank you very much for the video. I enjoyed hearing the stories and be allowed to be a part of the discussion from a hearing end. I know as a black gay man that lives an authentic life there is not enough open discussion. I applaud you at The Washington Post for many do not care or do not want to hear our stories.

The only thing I can say in closing is that I wanted MORE!!