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Posted at 10:43 AM ET, 11/ 1/2006

K-Fed, for the True Connoisseur

By Liz Kelly

Why is this man smiling? (AP)

Can we get a little love for K-Fed? Not only has he been busy single-handedly keeping California populated and proving that fatherhood doesn't have to stop you from partying all night in Vegas, he's also been busy developing his acting career and, yesterday, releasing his very first CD, "Playing With Fire."

Thing is, almost at precisely the same moment -- I know because I timed it with two stopwatches -- his CD was hitting store shelves, concert promoters were canceling his shows due to poor ticket sales. And when I say "concert," I mean stints at small nightclubs, not arenas. To be fair, the shows in question are in the backwaters of Cleveland and New York where we know people do not like "sincere urban storytelling" and are forcibly locked in their homes after 7 p.m.

I'm not sure how long it takes for sales to register on the Billboard charts, but, well, I'm sure it'll get there soon. One Amazon.com reviewer described the album thusly:

"You could almost call it a concept album, the concept being a response to all of the negativity around him -- basically taunting America back."

Well, touche.

More importantly, Federline yesterday also confirmed that his newest son is named "Jayden James." He did not, however, confirm that he, like, totally made it up.

By Liz Kelly  | November 1, 2006; 10:43 AM ET
Categories:  Celebrities  
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Comments

Hey K-fed... Yoko Ono's on the phone. She wants her fifteen minutes of fame back!

Posted by: Margo | November 1, 2006 10:47 AM | Report abuse

Let me just understand... this guy is a dancer and certain women consider him "hot"?

Anyway, I think K-Fed proves the theory of evolution. Because if "Intelligent Design" was true, K-Fed would not exist. Think about it for a moment.

Posted by: Bunkley | November 1, 2006 11:13 AM | Report abuse

Liz, I thought you wrote about celebrity. This leech is a celebritney.

Posted by: kurosawaguy | November 1, 2006 11:24 AM | Report abuse

Let me get this straight:

Back-up dancer has relationship with working actress. While said actress is pregnant with their second child, he abandons her for major pop starlet with less-than-glamorous image.

Back-up dancer then marries pop-starlet, pretty much gets her immediately pregnant, but continues his incredibly self-involved, hedonistic lifestyle. Gets her pregnant again, which doesn't seem to slow him down much. But this shouldn't be surprising, really, because he already left the mother of his first children to pursue a good time....

Somewhere between the birth of his third and fourth children, he decides he wants his own career...most likely because in her continually hormonal state, the pop-starlet may actually come to her senses and kick him out.

So he sponges off his notoriety and wife's money/fame and claims he is now a credible artist. Thereby probably making many undiscovered, thoroughly credible artists suicidal.

So what am I supposed to love about this guy? I guess I have to respect that he's learned how to play the game, but other than that, please stop wasting print and virtual ink on this guy. He's a waste of oxygen.

Posted by: Chasmosaur | November 1, 2006 11:39 AM | Report abuse

I have been laughing my you-know-what off reading those Amazon reviews. So, I decided to write my own.

-Do I count 51 cards in that deck, Mr. Federline?

How appropriate that Kevin is in an insane asylum on the album cover. Perhaps this CD was in association with the Make-A-Wish foundation. "Mr. Federline, could you please put out that Virginia Slim? We need to shoot for your album cover." The attire is also appropriate because this CD is in fact, for the blue-collar American.

Posted by: Zamora | November 1, 2006 11:57 AM | Report abuse

Since K-Fed wants rap about subjects that are close to him, Why didn't he call his CD "Sperm Donor".

I guess that would be too real for him.
Truth in advertising

Posted by: Lisa | November 1, 2006 12:08 PM | Report abuse

Let's do the world a favor and not waste any more time/effort on this talentless jerk. Maybe? Britney will come to her senses and realize that he's not "her man" as she announced at the Grammy's but just another person all too willing to spend her money and try and ride the coattails of her supposed fame. I don't like Britney but even she deserves better than him.

Posted by: pnina | November 1, 2006 12:16 PM | Report abuse

Lisa, that made me laugh. Out loud. I am now mopping up my keyboard which is covered with the drink I was sipping at the time. It was worth it though.

Posted by: neener | November 1, 2006 12:17 PM | Report abuse


Will someone please let K-Fed know that Home Depot in Frenso, CA will take him back
for the holiday rush.

Posted by: Alicia | November 1, 2006 12:29 PM | Report abuse

If this album is as bad as his acting on CSI....then the world is doomed...I wonder if there is any mention of K-Fed in Nostradamus' works!

Posted by: Help me | November 1, 2006 12:48 PM | Report abuse

Im the talk of the town
Thats the reason why they stare
4 karats in my ear
If you look see a glare

When the pen hits the pad
It's in the left hand
Every single word is worth thirty grand

Every word out my mouth
Make headline news
I'm the best, I rule
Come test my tools

~This is frightening!

Posted by: Anonymous | November 1, 2006 1:04 PM | Report abuse

Never eat your treats
Never eat your treats
Till they're checked
Till they're checked
Show them to Mommy
Show them to Daddy
Make sure they're safe
Make sure they're safe

Posted by: Max | November 1, 2006 1:15 PM | Report abuse

As we all know K-Fed is not the first back-up dancer to marry a chart-topping songstress. Chris Judd? Anyone? I'm not sure who I admire more: Chris Judd for his classiness (and restraint from starting his own fashion line) or K-Fed for using what he's got while he's got it (that would be Britney, not talent).

Posted by: katerkat | November 1, 2006 1:16 PM | Report abuse

K-Fed wasn't Brit-Brit's back-up dancer, he was her pot dealer. That's how they met.

Posted by: match.com | November 1, 2006 1:46 PM | Report abuse

K-Fed could be the new(est) version of the american dream: a talentless hack who gets not only a wife who is rich and (very?) attractive but a dancing, music, acting, and fashion career. Even if there is a pre-nup (please God, let there be a pre-nup) he still probably gets millions. And, now with his concerts being cancelled, he doesn't even have to "work" And all he has to worry about is brittney dumping him (see pre-nup above) and critics, who lets face it, have to work for a living.

How bad can it be to be K-Fed? (plus, he's got that COOL nickname!)

Posted by: BB | November 1, 2006 1:48 PM | Report abuse

If marrying rich women and getting the Benjamins was a crime, then John Kerry is twice as bad as K-Fed.

Posted by: Stick | November 1, 2006 2:36 PM | Report abuse

The reviews on Amazon.com have nothing on the MSNBC review (see a snippet below). I printed it out to use on those days when nothing is going right. He's clearly a hard worker, doing the back up dancing and the drugs, I assume he means dealing. Those are two hectic professions.

Tracks like "Privilege" are spot-on smooth, with K-Fed rhyming about the life he's grown accustomed to -- and the one he left behind. "I got Gucci on, she got Prada/ She calls me daddy but she's not my daughter/ And I'm not her father I'm just a mack/ Got tired of the drugs so I switched to rap."

Posted by: petal | November 1, 2006 2:58 PM | Report abuse

For real? Rapping about Gucci and Prada is so '99...

Posted by: petalfan | November 1, 2006 3:43 PM | Report abuse

So,Let me get this straight.I have been a songwriter
for 25 years & I have to knock up a ho to get my music
on the radio?

Is there a child quota also or can I get by with just one?

Fundies and sociopaths ruined the music buisness a long time ago.

Posted by: Eric | November 1, 2006 4:05 PM | Report abuse

Heh, if Justin Timberlake and Ashlee Simpson can foist pre-fabricated music on us, why can't he?

If you want to piss and moan about anyone coming out of that pop generation of singer-hyphen-airheads, then go hang L.A. Reid from a telephone pole. He's the one that turned most of these people loose upon us. The whole pantheon of useless, minimal talent, overly polished, machine concocted performers.

Posted by: James Buchanan | November 1, 2006 5:13 PM | Report abuse

I think "K-Fed" needs to realize the only thing he'll ever b famous for is his relationship with Ms Spears and forget about trying to have a career in the spotlight...thats Brit's job

Posted by: JayRay | November 1, 2006 5:24 PM | Report abuse

I can't believe you guys don't know, don't care, or just haven't mentioned just how rock bottom his career is...you guys know he's been on WWE Raw getting beat up by John "The Marine" Cena, right? I thought it was gonna be an imersonator, but it's actually him...and, for the record, he's been a great sport on playing the "heel" character and playing up the point that the crowd HATES him. Funny stuff...

Posted by: What? No WWE mention? | November 1, 2006 6:54 PM | Report abuse

impersonator...sorry

Posted by: Anonymous | November 1, 2006 6:54 PM | Report abuse

what a P.W.T.T and for yall who dont know that's Poor White Tailer Trash. Who in the hell would buy his albums he can"t rap and he's corney. But you have to give him ssome props for being able to work a Ho like Britney. She got married at a las vegas hotel in a druken stupor. Hell! she's a R.W.T.T too.

Posted by: getalife | November 15, 2006 7:14 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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