Thank you for this.

I was really surprised by how boring Tom is too. I was also surprised that he still wears tight, light colored jeans circa 1984 (in Friday's episode).

I wish there had been a video clip from Matt Lauer. Where in the world is Matt Lauer? He's in Istanbul growing a beard and being glib on a video message for Tom Cruise.

1. was that psycho scientology tape mentioned? You know the one where he claims that if a scientologists come upon a car accident, they are forced to stop, since they are the only ones that know what to do.

2. does he have a new movie coming out? it seems this is very calculated to coincide with a movie opening and since he last few totally tanked, he's trying to show the world he's actually human?

Thanks for your bravery in watching this, Liz. And "Cruise's timing is about as reliable as my 20-year-old Swatch" is hilarious.

I don't get why he's so well liked as an actor. I think the only movie I thought he was decent in was "Taps." After that, whatever (and that includes "Risky Business" -- hated it).

The Oprah visits were timed to coincide with a 25-years of Tom Cruise box set.

Yay, Liz - thanks for watching so we don't have to! That sounds like one long incredibly dull love-fest.

Oh my god, you were serious about the box sets, I thought it was a joke. It had to be a joke, a box set of Tom Cruise movies...talk about a snoozefest.

I used to call Andrew McCarthy the "poor man's Tom Cruise" -- same two facial expressions (toothy grin, lame stare) and limited talent.

Now I think it's the other way around. Tom Cruise has become in my view the "poor man's Andrew McCarthy." Tom? Just go already.

I liked TC in Magnolia too.

Seriously though, why should anyone be surprised that actors are nothing more than empty, vapid vessels into which the grand ideas and vision of *others* are poured?

My disillusionment with actors began with the first time I watched Celebrity Jeopardy. Those people are just, well, stupid.

Looks like Jada found Amy Winehouse's missing beehive. And I guess those are appliques on her tank top, but at first glance I thought one was a giant stain.

Maybe Jada was sending a subliminal message about TC by dressing like a freak.

Forget about saving Tom Cruise, someone please save Jada's hair.

But more important, Liz, did Oprah's boobs point at Tom during the interview?

Comment of the week: Jada "looked like she'd just returned from imprisonment in a Yakuza flop house."

The teacher surpasses her students.

My disillusionment with actors began with the first time I watched Celebrity Jeopardy. Those people are just, well, stupid.

Posted by: jelo | May 6, 2008 11:17 AM

I love Celebrity Jeopardy, it makes me feel like a freakin' genius!

"Get the Vaseline ready for that camera lens."

Nah, never mind - Baba Wawa's bringing the Astroglide.

Man, that Tom Cruise Slide Show on the Oprah site is insufferable, to wit:

"I had no idea that I'd be here 25 years later doing this," he says.

Yeah, neither did we, pal. Neither did we.

2. does he have a new movie coming out? it seems this is very calculated to coincide with a movie opening and since he last few totally tanked, he's trying to show the world he's actually human?

Posted by: More questions | May 6, 2008 11:02 AM

*********

Well, Valkyrie's coming out this summer - no, wait, October. What's that? FEBRUARY, now? How about Thanksgiving '08 - that way we'll be guaranteed a turkey...

the only celebrity that ever impressed me on Celebrity Jeopardy was Bob Costas. That man is a genius.

The teacher surpasses her students.

------------------------------------------
Is this Byoolin, or Byoolin channeling Tom Cruise?

Did they mention "Cocktail?" Or is that even more taboo than a Scientology video?
Also, seriously, has Oprah's head always been that giant? It is really, really huge. I'm thinking at least a gallon water displacement.

And who else is with me when I go to Chicago to test that theory.

Did they mention "Cocktail?" Or is that even more taboo than a Scientology video?

Posted by: other liz | May 6, 2008 11:30 AM

Not nearly as taboo as 'Eyes Wide Shut'.

Who knew that thetans are apparently the cause of humans having personalities? I never thought studying for finals would be more fun that watching tv.

Thanks Liz for sacrificing yourself. You deserve emergency medical leave for this one. Said leave to be taken at the nearest bar to kill all the brain cells that saw that "love fest" (brought to you by Blackmail R Us)

other liz, I've always been a believer in testing theory. I'm in.

Not nearly as taboo as 'Eyes Wide Shut'.

Posted by: jes | May 6, 2008 11:33 AM
----------

Man, what a STINKER! (Did Nicole Kidman and/or Mimi Rogers send pre-taped messages by any chance? Somehow I bet no.)

Forget waterboarding, just put me in a room with a TC double feature of "Vanilla Sky" and "Eyes Wide Shut" and I'll confess to anything.

"Did Nicole Kidman and/or Mimi Rogers send pre-taped messages by any chance? Somehow I bet no.)"

Yes, I think many people forget just how badly he treated them.

Eyes Wide Shut isn't as taboo as Legend. You'll NEVER hear Cruise mention Legend.

A film I like regardless of Cruise's role in it. He gives a generic toss away performance in it (big shocker there), but more importantly it also gives us the Great Tim Curry in one of his finest roles since Frank N. Furter & Pennywise.

I give you Tim Curry as one of the best, practically iconic looking Devils of all time!!

http://content.flixster.com/photo/34/12/65/3412656_gal.jpg

The other movie he never mentions is Losing It. Another forgettable 80s teen sex romp about kids going to Tijuana to lose their virginity, only notable in that it also stars Shelly Long & Jackie Earle Haley.

Didn't Mimi Rogers sort of create that monster? Isn't she the ur Scientologist in the Cruise branch?

You're so right Tom is bore, but according to a girlfriend who slept with him before Katie and Nicole. The man is hot in the sack.

Jada has been getting fashion tips from Whitney Houston. And perhaps more than that.

Was anybody else surprised to find out later that Oprah has a house in Telluride, considering how she ooh'ed and aah'ed over Tom's and almost acted as if she'd never seen mountains or snowmobiles?

Tom Cruise the person may be nuttier then a house owned by squirrels, but most of his movies are enjoyable.
Top Gun, Taps, Far and Away, Risky Business, the Mission Impossible films, the one set in Japan, all very enjoyable films.
I can hate the actor and still love the move and I can hate the movie and still love the actor. They are completely separate things to me.

The only reason Tom Cruise was good in Magnolia is because he was playing Tom Cruise. It's the same intensely hyperactive ecomaniac, just with long hair and [rabidly] preaching casual sex instead of scientology.

The funny thing is, Eyes Wide Shut should have been a great career move. Look at Stanley Kubrick's movies before that - brillent, mindblowing pieces of film art. I often wonder if the movie would have been good if Kubrick had lived.

The annoying thing about TC is how he is able to get actors I really respect to be in his movies. I would love to see how Eddie Izzard and TC got along on the set, considering their view on religion.

Funniest part of the "Ten Things":

"Or maybe Oprah's show is for sale"

Maybe!?!?

Still laffin'......

Liz, Vaseline is field-expedient fall back for creating soft focus when the camera operator has forgotten to pack his/her soft focus filter. K-Y may be a better fall back than Vaseline, because it is water-soluble and can be more easily wiped off the lens.

Some camera operators prefer K-Y Warming, because they claim that besides softening the focus, it imparts a warming tone to the ambient light. This claim is likely apocryphal.

Tom also borrows from his films. {Guess he can't think of things on his own.} The serenading while singing "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling" is from "Top Gun". Tom and Anthony Edwards sing it to Kelly McGillis before they realize she's their flight instructor.

Tom also borrows from his films. {Guess he can't think of things on his own.} The serenading while singing "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling" is from "Top Gun". Tom and Anthony Edwards sing it to Kelly McGillis before they realize she's their flight instructor.

Posted by: | May 6, 2008 1:35 PM

Seriously? Is THAT where it's from? And here I thought it was from Jerry Maguire.

Hey, come on!

Maybe Tom Cruise just wants to be the change that he wants in this world.

In his pretentious way.

Jerry Maguire may not have Tommy singing, but it does have him yelling into his phone, "I love you, black man! I love all black people!" Which is a classic film moment.

And also the eternally excellent line "Help me help you."

Tommy did quite well in that movie, I must say. But I don't enjoy it as much anymore now that I know he's bat s**t crazy.

And "you complete me"...And "show me the money" which is annoying in that montage they show at Cap's games.

I did/do like A Few Good Men. But I think it was all the men in uniform, not necessarily TC.

You know some celebs seem like they would be fascinating to hang around with, like the Ocean's 11 crowd, and Tom Cruise and "Kate"'s friends just seem like vapid, boring shells. Even Will Smith, who I like, seems dull as a tomb here (he needs to go back to Jazzy Jeff).
Cruise is a successful mega-money-maker so of course all these people are going to have nice things to say about him. But I think his movies are dreadful (other than Risky Business). Magnolia sucked, but he was good in it.

Oh, wait, I did like Jerry Maguire too.

Liz, I know that this may not be a revelation to you but most of these "celebrities" or "stars" are totally boring. Jennifer Aniston, please, a cure for insomnia. Tom is carefully managed and his "life" is totally orchestrated as fodder for the masses. Anyone with half a brain realizes that he is manipulative, insincere and as calculating as a serial killer. He must have something good on Oprah for her to pander to him so obviously. No one has that many friends.

He must have something good on Oprah for her to pander to him so obviously. No one has that many friends.

Posted by: vicki Pasadena, CA | May 6, 2008 1:57 PM

Plus it's sweeps month. Don't day time talk shows count?

"I'm not all snark and criticism."

Well, you mostly, are, anyway. This article was awesome. I was laughing the whole way through.

Can we please go back to the days when no one knew anything about Tom Cruise's private life? I won't even see his movies now that he's exposed himself as such a misogynist nutbag.

Holy mackerel, what happened to Jada? I too thought there was a giant stain on her shirt! Hee.

Cruise is even creepier than he was before. If that's at all possible. Making one last sweep of my dvd collection to ensure that his image no longer appears in my house.

Liz Kelly, thanks for watching so I didn't have to. Your observations confirmed my suspicions. I liked "Magnolia" and thought Cruise was good in it. Then, when I saw the Scientology video released earlier this year, I realized he was tapping into a very real part of himself for that role.
I honestly believe he's nutty and boring.

TC is creepy & so is Oprah now.

All of your comments are so hilarious...I love it! May I also chime in on how AWFUL "Eyes Wide Shut" was? HORRENDOUS! I was so confused that I actually tortured myself by watching it again (no I did not shell out dollars for that crap). Ugh...

On another note, "Interview with the Vampire" was pretty good. I think he played a good Lestat (even though a lot of Ann Rice fans were disappointed in the selections). I think he embraced the sometimes sick charm that is Lestat. Not to mention it was a mostly male cast of HOTTIES! *sigh*

your all so retarded and ignorant. grow up hes a human being everyone likes different things and act different...

Maybe we're "retarded and ignorant", but we do know the difference between your and you're. So nyah.

I am appalled at the universial hatred for Tom Cruise. I didn't see anything wrong with the interview and I think all of you are JEALOUS! The man is being crucified for believing in Scientology. Its none of our business what a celebrity believes in. Is Tom Cruise out there murdering people or hurting anyone? America loves to discriminate against people. Sadly, its what this country was built on.

Tom's grin and forced laugh are his 'money shot'.

It's like watching porn only boring.

You tell her, RCR.

Anyway daniela, we're not talking about Miley Cyrus, so get the f**k off our blog and go hang out at TeenDisney and for the love of all that is holy, LEARN SOME GRAMMAR!!!!!!!!

Liz Kelly,

You obviously don't like Tom Cruise or Scientology. Does spewing your hate make you feel good?

Am I the only one who liked Tom Cruise on Oprah? I didn't think he was boring. I thought he looked hot and thoroughly enjoyed watching him, even with the television on mute.

"You obviously don't like Tom Cruise or Scientology. Does spewing your hate make you feel good?

Posted by: Gary | May 6, 2008 2:59 PM"

It makes me feel all warm and tingly inside.

Loved the article. Both TC episodes on Oprah were just horrible -- even the first one. He barely said anything of even superficial meaning. On the couch-jumping episode, TC remarked, "It was a moment." Yeah, a publicity-grabbing and girlfriend-impressing moment...

Oh, and Oprah's show IS for sale. Is there really any question? Most of her shows are just one big commercial. When anyone comes to her show b/c they are in a new movie, the show is barely entertaining -- it's an hour-long commercial. She has even said that she wouldn't showcase certain products on her show b/c the manufacturer wouldn't pay her "fee". So, her show is definitely for sale. You don't get to be a billionaire without knowing how to generate some money, right?

Although, the thought that he must have something over on Oprah went through my mind too. Glad to hear I wasn't the only one!

Omg omg - are we getting just the tiniest touch of Booby Kennedy Day??

"your all so retarded and ignorant. grow up hes a human being everyone likes different things and act different..."

------------------------------------------

Red Alert! Red Alert! The Testing Tweener Scientologists have been loosed against the Celebritology Blog.

Shields up!

Scotty Byoolin, phasers and photon torpedoes won't work against these zombies. Do we have anything in our arsenal that might work?

Heh! You said 'arse.'

"Does spewing your hate make you feel good?"
-------------------------------------------

"It makes me feel all warm and tingly inside."
------------------------------------------
Here we go again with the innuendo. And I'm not talking about Italian enemas, either.

...but seriously, our best defense against these Booby Kennedy Invaders comprises three things:

1) Our innate sense of the absurd;
2) Our inability to worship celebrities;
3) Our ability to laugh at 1) and 2); and
4) Our - I'll come in again...

our best defense against these Booby Kennedy Invaders comprises FOUR things:

1) Our innate sense of the absurd;
2) Our inability to worship celebrities;
3) Our ability to laugh at 1) and 2); and
4) Our ability to laugh at those who don't get 1), 2), or 3).

I think Mission Impossible (the first one) is probably the only TC movie I can watch without thinking about how nutso this guy is. I have to admit I hate learning too much about stars lives. I liked Meg Ryan until the Russel Crow thing, just like I liked TC until the Scientology thing.

Carol is appalled at the verbal brickbats being thrown at Thomas Cruise Mapother IV:

"The man is being crucified for believing in Scientology."

--------------------------------------------

So you'd prefer a high-tech lynching, instead?

When Thomas Cruise Mapother takes the middle initial of H., then you can start the crucifixion metaphor. Until then, Death by Paparazzi is probably your best alternative metaphor.

COORDINATOR: Crucifixion?
TOM CRUISE: Er, no, freedom actually.
COORDINATOR: What?
TOM CRUISE: Yeah, they said I hadn't done anything and I could go and live on an island somewhere.
COORDINATOR: Oh I say, that's very nice. Well, off you go then.
TOM CRUISE: No, I'm just pulling your leg, it's crucifixion really.
COORDINATOR: [laughing] Oh yes, very good. Well...
TOM CRUISE: Yes I know, out of the door, one cross each, line on the left.

All of you haters...get out of your moms basements and get jobs; you'll feel a whole lot better about yourselves. And Liz Kelly...is that a picture of you? If so I would think twice before critizing anybodys hair or any part of their looks. S.

"Does spewing your hate make you feel good?"

Some people play tennis, we erode the human soul.

(All credit to Tycho of Penny Arcade.)

your all so retarded and ignorant. grow up hes a human being everyone likes different things and act different...

Posted by: daniela | May 6, 2008 2:37 PM

All of you haters...get out of your moms basements and get jobs; you'll feel a whole lot better about yourselves. And Liz Kelly...is that a picture of you? If so I would think twice before critizing anybodys hair or any part of their looks. S.

Posted by: sacha | May 6, 2008 3:32 PM
******************************************

Yo fatties, carm down. Also, you might need to be hooked up to the e-meter for your anger issues. Clearly there are some thetans that must be eradicated.

He is a joke. He used to be an interesting actor/personality- now he is just a mind-numbing, robotic and disturbing "celebrity". If I saw him in a restaurant, I would run the other way. He has some serious issues and I don't intend on seeing anything else he ever does. I can't get past his real-life creepy and shady personality enough to suspend belief and buy into any character he might play. Big time "ICK" factor!!!

I propose to leave the name "Tom Cruise" to those who continue to worship the thetans that radiate from his spindly, undersized body.

To those who are repulsed y the man, I invite you to join me by by hereafter using only the man's legal surname -- Mapother -- when referring to him. Using only the surname evokes the eerie feelings his behavior and beliefs engender in audiences.

Imagine how much better today's blog headline wold be if it read

10 Truths About Mapother.

Cue Halloween music.

and why exactly do you feel the need to weigh in here, sacha? talk about a hater.

"I can't get past his real-life creepy and shady personality enough to suspend belief and buy into any character he might play."

I'm with you there, D. Rodriguez, if by "creepy and shady personality" you mean "inability to act."

"All of you haters...get out of your moms basements and get jobs; you'll feel a whole lot better about yourselves"

sasha, honey, where do you think we are?

You all are just jealous, why don't you mind your own business, you need to get jobs, post pictures of yourselves, yaddayaddayadda...

Someone needs to create a shortcut chart for celebritology's #1 haters. That way they could just pop in and post something quick like "u ppl suck N should #8, 11, an 14."

That way it would easier to hurl insults via text message, plus regular celebritology readers wouldn't have to wade through as much drivel.

Sacha, your mother was just telling me how fine a job I did.

Referring to "that man" in a derogatory manner as "Mapother" is an insult to his actor cousin: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0544611/

(Don't ask me why I knew that he had an actor cousin. By the way, there's no mention of either Oprah or Scientology in William Mapother's bio.)

Some of you people need to get a life, including the author of this article. REALLY
If you (author) find nothing of value in TC why did you watch the show, because it is your job? ... I think not! As you stated, you will be watching the show with Barbara Walters also, so I guess we can expect another hatchet job tomorrow!
Criticism is one thing, but some of the comments here are seriously cruel and you people should be ashamed!
Some of you are scrapping the bottom of the barrel of human decency

Oh, A Whitaker...it *is* her job to watch the show. And we love her for it. In a non-creepy, platonic way, of course.

Oh td and William Mapother, forgive me. I did not know. I guess I will have to find another alias for TC.

Hmmmm, how about Turd Cutter?

Mr/Ms Whitaker, we here denizens of Celebritology do not scrape the bottom of the barrel of human decency. If you wish to observe that sort of behavior, you'll have to visit the sports blogs...or the White House Briefing Room.

Besides, it's Byoolin's turn in the barrel, today.

Yo fatties, carm down. Also, you might need to be hooked up to the e-meter for your anger issues. Clearly there are some thetans that must be eradicated.

Posted by: Magnolia | May 6, 2008 3:37 PM

Awesome tie-in.

And I agree, we need a "go-to" list for the newbies. They just don't get the irony of it all.

Happy BKD everyone!!

Do you think Will & Jada are on retainer? It's the only reason I can think of that he'd hang with the looney & boring Cruise...

Kinda like Brooke Shields attending his latest wedding. Me thinks a bank draft hit her account after that paid appearance.

Can we now officially say Will Smith and Jada are Scientologists? There is no way that Tom's handlers would allow him to have a best friend that wasn't a fellow Scientologist. I think Will Smith is trying to avoid the label since it would most likely hurt his career and image.

You know what? I have a job. A really very demanding and stressful one. That is why I like to stop by here and get a good laugh. Thank you Magnolia for the "carm down" - it did me good.
When I was a child, and I did something stupid and then cried about the consequences, such as people laughing at me, my wise old Grandma would tell me that while she was sorry that my feelings were hurt, I basically brought the consequences on myself by my own actions.
That is what happens to celebrities who put their nutty lives out there for everyone to see. They reap the consequences of their actions. The consequences are that we, here at Celebritology can make fun of them ruthlessly. SO, TC is a nutty, nutty, nutty guy. Nuttier than the oak tree in my back yard. Nuttier than JIF, OK? Did I mention nutty? So, people are going to make fun of him. Now, tomorrow and maybe forever unless his spaceship actually shows up and takes him and the rest of his nutty, nutty friends away. So there.

Cruise was good in "Magnolia" because he was playing himself.

Compare Tom's monologue to the man-cult in "Magnolia" to any of the tapes of him proselytizing on behalf of L. Ron's church.

Same creepy intensity, inappropriate mannerisms and use of cryptic lingo. As the master says: Wild and Woolly, Baby, Wild and Woolly!

I'm so happy someone mentioned Legend. I *heart* that movie, no matter how crazy TC gets. (I was surprised to find that I liked The Last Samurai, too. Cue the ridicule!)

Liz, thank you. I needed a laugh today, and I got several. Yikes, that fool is crazy, though!

Sunny, you spent all day searching the FedReg? No wonder you're in a Daze.

Oh, yes and now I am cross referencing with the USC. Oh Joy for Sunnydaze! So, I am a little cranky about people with no grammer skills telling me I need to get a job. CRANKY! Silly teenyboppers - get a job yourselves - I hear McD's doesn't really care if you are literate. I did mention cranky, yes?

OH, and USC does NOT mean any of the universities that use those initials.

For all you non-Celebritologists (you know who you are) we will happily turn away from the Celebrity Du Jour and turn our snarkiness on you. So I hope you all have very thick skins.

I'm talking to you sasha.

A. Whitaker, I really hope you were being ironic. Because if you weren't, this line alone is completely idiotic:

"Criticism is one thing, but some of the comments here are seriously cruel and you people should be ashamed!"

Seriously cruel? As in going on national television and--without any credentials in psychology-- telling an actress who has post partum depression that she should not take medication?

Should be ashamed? As in someone who follows a made-up religion, invented by a science fiction writer who freely offers medical advice that has no clinical proof of effectiveness?

Inkedbuddha, really? I came out of Last Samurai with a great liking for Timothy Spall (who seems to be a nice guy when he isn't playing incredibly creepy bad guys), a crush on several Japanese actors, and the burning question of why Tom Cruise was there in the first place. (because seriously, there were multiple hot Japanese guys.)

I do, however, thank Tom Cruise for introducing me to the work of Aaron Sorkin. Aaron may have betrayed me with Studio 60, but The Farnsworth Invention has made that all better. Not sure I can go back to my DVD of A Few Good Men, though. This is why I prefer theatre to film - there's always a chance of a production without the people you hate, but with film you're pretty much stuck since remakes nearly always suck.

Yes, I'm afraid Will & Jada are going Scientologist on us. The photo of them kind of gives me the creeps--why is he so skinny? And what is that thing on Jada's head?

::passes Sunny bottle of leftover tequila::
::resumes bouncing peanuts off Cruise's hairdo::

I'm surprised by all of the negative posts about Tom Cruise. I've followed his career since the beginning and I still like him. I don't care about his personal life or religious beliefs. I like to go to movies...period. I've enjoyed many of his films, especially Jerry McGuire, A Few Good Men and Top Gun. I even enjoyed his recent interviews on Oprah. I thought he seemed nice and nervous (I would be too if I knew that the public was going to analyze every word I spoke and each expression I gave!). I really wish the press and the public would leave him alone. Let him do what he does best and that's make movies. Don't go to his movies if you don't like him, but please cut the guy some slack, will you? He's only human!

Speaking of Booby Kennedy Day, I just wandered over to the Miley Cyrus entry and there are way more comments. That thing has a life of its own:
http://blog.washingtonpost.com/celebritology/2008/04/comment_box_the_naked_truth_ab.html

Huh. And, unless I'm thinking of the wrong entry (and how could I be?) both RCR's "yo fatty" rejoinder and the post that have inspired it have vanished from the comments. Liz? What's that about?

I may be in a serious minority here, but I think Tom Cruise can act. Seriously, did nobody else see Collateral?
Let's all talk some more about how scary Oprah is. I won't make fun of her freaky giant head anymore. I'm just wondering why she's so darn famous when she gives such crappy interview.

Clap clap clap.

I just laughed out loud more than I have since the last BKD. Thank you, regulars and irregulars, for giving me a much needed late afternoon mood lifter.

And Magnolia, your use of "yo fatties, carm down" was just genius.

I'm so dang proud.

"OH, and USC does NOT mean any of the universities that use those initials."

Interesting. I just searched the keyword "Trojan" on the US Code site and found this:

Your query Trojan returned 1 results.
1000 US CODE: TITLE 15,7703. PROHIBITION AGAINST PREDATORY AND ABUSIVE COMMERCIAL E-MAIL
TITLE 15 - COMMERCE AND TRADE/CHAPTER 103 - CONTROLLING THE ASSAULT OF NON-SOLICITED PORNOGRAPHY AND MARKETING

Is there a Scientologist alert website that picks up any article written about Tom Cruise and dispatches a bunch of fruitcakes to write "Tom Cruise is the greatest man that ever lived, you're (or "your") all just jealous" posts? Because the comments are similar for Tom Shales' hilarious review of the first show.

O SURPRISE SURPRISE, another TOM CRUISE BASHING article. I dont understand what TOM CRUISE has ever done that deserves any of this. Oh he jumped on a couch? HMM he doesnt believe in psychiartry? And THAT makes him crazy!? Its ridiculous. He doesnt even TALK about scientology, except to church members. PEOPLE just like jumping on bandwagons.

That all seemed so fake - Please someone shut up Oprah & Tom Cruise

Omg - I *love* bandwagons! How did you know? The trombones! The bass drum! The sound system! Ahhhh. Nothing like a good afternoon on a bandwagon.

THANK YOU -- THANK YOU -- THANK YOU!

The last three days have been really terrible, and I needed a good laugh. I've been practically snorting my iced tea for the past 20 minutes reading all this.

Ummm, is it really true that TC's surname is Mapother? Kind of reminds me of Mathazar. Not that he can help what his surname is, but still.

Nope, they're still there H3. They were in the Morning Mix from the following day:

http://blog.washingtonpost.com/celebritology/2008/04/morning_mix_leave_miley_alone.html

Scroll down to about 9:30 a.m.

Ah, thank you, Liz. I was thinking it was in the first Miley post. We need a celebritology FAQ that links to such seminal comments.

We need a celebritology FAQ that links to such seminal comments.

Posted by: h3 | May 6, 2008 5:15 PM

seminal comments - or we could call them Mileystones.

10. TC can't speak in complete sentences unless they're scripted.

There must be two different Oprah channels, because the episode I saw was an exceptional show. You could not help but see that Tom is very well admired and respected. And this is from people who have worked with him and know him. Yet reading the posts here, by people that undoubtedly do not know him nor have met him, you'd think just the opposite.

So you don't like Tom Cruise. Fine! You find him boring. Then the real question is why would someone spend an hour of their lives watching a TV show with him in it and then spending additional time of their lives on sites like this spewing inane criticisms.

Good thing for Hollywood and the crass likes of Cruise and his ilk. Talk about attention seekers. How much nicer are the Meryl Streeps, the Pacinos, the Mirrans - the true actors/artists who work to perfect their craft, truly entertain us on the screen, and manage to live their lives in relative quiet. Funny how most of the attention seekers are the least talented.

I gave half a thought...

Good thing for Hollywood and the crass likes of Cruise and his ilk. They give us much to laugh and poke fun at.

Other Liz, I completely agree with the Collateral assessment. When TCM has a good director to tell him what to do, he seems to actually be able to pull off a command performance (take note Spielberg).

Also, I can't believe I missed a Booby Kennedy Day, this is what I get for being productive.

Why can't you people (i.e, the visitors-- not the regulars) make your point without shouting?

If you heard Will Smith's comments about Tom, you can't help but recognize this man is an exceptional human being. He's come to the aid of strangers in need, helped out in car and boating accidents. So it's not such a nice thing to try to tear down someone of good will. In fact, it's one of the lowest things a person can do. Give it a rest!

Sunnydaze, you have my deepest sympathies, truly. I avoid the Federal Register like it is a Tom Cruise/Miley Cyrus movie.

A Sin MoCo, scientology must be really afraid of Liz's column to deploy its minions against it this like this.

To the moron who said he never talks about hs scientology in public: Are you deaf? Or are you related to Vanessa Hudgens? He talks about it constantly. Oprah, protecting her investment, didn't bring it up in the interviews that's all. Somethng those who watched it noted.

So you don't like Tom Cruise. Fine! You find him boring. Then the real question is why would someone spend an hour of their lives watching a TV show with him in it and then spending additional time of their lives on sites like this spewing inane criticisms.

Posted by: mike | May 6, 2008 5:26 PM

Liz watches it 'cause it's her job. The rest of us spew inane criticisms because inane criticisms are hilarious. Does that answer your question?

Here's my #10: Tom has no original thoughts. He's either quoting from a movie (I swear "You've lost that loving feeling" might be the only song he knows by heart. Why else would you ever sing that song? It's about a destroyed relationship!) or he's spouting some sanitized L. Ron Hubbardism. When asked questions about his real life, he stammered and hesitated and ended up spewing empty platitudes.

you're all a bunch of retards=and yes, I have joined you - TC is an excellent promoter as is OW -

They are in the money.

To the person that said Tom Cruise (I refuse to call him TC, I am not his friend) never talks about Scientology in public -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0_AO1wsGDE

Here's the Scientology video that proved that this man is just plain freakin' nuts.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFBZ_uAbxS0

I have no problem with you if you chose to like Tom Cruise, but don't hate on those of us that haven't been brainwashed into thinking he's a great actor.

I am not BELIEVING this. I was reading the article, started reading the posts, and find out that some of you folks are REGULARS here? You have got to be kidding me. LOL!!!!!

I like to believe that Mimi is a fan, not a hater.

And to First Timer: One of us, one of us, one of us....

I love TC movies. Cant wait for his new ones to come out. I heard he is in Tropical Thunder in which he brings the house down. Apparently you dont even recognize him in costume while he plays a "dirty" producer.

Tom Cruise is a fruit loop, and Oprah's a secret $cientologist. How else to explain her love affair with its participants?

Why in the heck did Tom Cruise need a 2-part interview/love-fest about himself, anyways? Is it because Nicole actually earned an Oscar, married a man, and got a life, all after he dumped her?

puh-lease.
(no, I won't carm down.)

Normally I just lurk & enjoy the comments.

(I think there are some visitors from that angry parenting blog. They really do need the monitors to visit that one, and whip out the scanners - some major anger issues over there.)

I know why we liked the movie Collateral - he was cold, calculating character - just like real life: playing himself.

(With the exception of that movie, I too have difficulty watching the others since I know what a whack job he is.)

Another Great Infomercial Big O!

Your critique is a bit moronic. Cruise has a tremendous body of work, see www.tomcruise.com. This "couch jumping" thing was blown way out of proportion by gossip columnists. So he was enthusiastic. So what?

Tom Cruise is looking good and when the Press turn on a celebrity and the vested Interests destroy those who speak up against those drug companies who are part of the "Bilderberger group" ( see ENDGAME by Alex Jones or "Zeigheistmovie") very few can survive the onslaught from the elite, But Tom is still therer communicating and good on him!

I just watched ENDGAME and if you have not seen it I suggest you see it. Yes I can see how Tom Cruise is a Target to be destroyed by the Rich Elite who run Drug companies. So if Tom keeps speaking out about the Drug Cartels then he will have to do a " Mission Impossible" to survive the Madison Square PR crnies who work for the Rokerfellas. You will win Tom Because all the Good People on Earth are with you!

The Washington Post was once a great News Paper! But reading this article on Tom is not what I have expected from this News papaer! it is absurd that you could have a Jounalist write an article and be so critical. It is not much better than "Fox News" where they brag about being "fait and Balanced". You guys need to lift your game to where you were around the early 1970's around watergates time when Journalists where much higher calibre then what you have writing this article on Tom Cruise! Shame on you!

WhAT IS THE WASHINGTON pOST DOING ABOUT THE REAL ISSUES THAT FACE AMERICA? YES IT USE TO BE A PAPER THAT PUSHED THE ENVELOPE. WHY DO YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME IN THE DESTRUCTION OF TOM CRUISE WHEN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA HAS BEEN DISMANTLED BY GEORGE BUSH . PER THE ENDGAME MOVIE THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES HAS SIGNED THE DOCUMENTS THAT DISSOLVE THE USA AND THE "NEW UNION OF CANADA, MEXICO AND THE USA TO BE KNOW AS A NEW COUNTRY! WHERE IS THIS PAPER WHEN YOU HAVE A DUTY NOT TO DESTROY US CITIZENS LIKE TOM CRUISE BUT ATTACK THOSE WHO WANT TO DESTROY AMERICA FROM THE INSIDE, LIKE FROM THE OVAL OFFICE! WAKE UP WASHINTON POST, PLEASE YOUR COUNTRY NEEDS YOU!

Well May I say if Tom Cruise is about to bring out Mission Impossible 4 , then it might be to rescue the " Washington Post!"
Put it back as a Bastion of Free Press and report on what the hell is going on in this country with President George Bush selling America and becoming a new country where Mexico, Canada, and the USA ! It is unbeliveable that this is what is going on! Yep Looks like a job for Tom Cruise!
Time for Cruise Control Washington Post!

What do you mean by a New Union of Canada, USA and Mexico? If this is the same agenda that wants to destroy America as we know it and Tom Cruise as we know irt, How come Nothing is being said?!?!. Do you hear anything on Fox News? NOPE! How about the WSHINGTON POST? NOPE!
But do they report on TOM CRUISE? YEP!
Man what is going on here? How come we have to put up with camouflage of the real issues? Like Freedom maybe? About Betrayal?
It's been done before with " Watergate" !

Apparently this space used to be occupied by an Axe-Grinding Shop that moved and failed to notify some of its less-frequent regulars.

OK, these last few posts appear to be confusing reality and fantasy. Yes, I know reality can be a little boring sometimes, but really folks, the union of Canada, Mexico and the US??? Someone is off their meds. That is from a MOVIE. Movies are not real.

Also, this is a blog, not a news article. Liz Kelly is not only allowed to express her opinion, she is encouraged to do so. If you want a news article, please scroll to the top of the page and click on the little blue button that says, "NEWS." Thank you.

I just watched the interview on line wondering what the fuss is all about?
What on earth can move so many people to write about "one person"? IE: TOM CRUISE?
He's an actor for pete's sake. There are millions of actors around. What is the fascination with Tom Cruise?
DId he just run the mile in record time?
I don't think so.
Go on people go and get yourself a godd little life some where and find something good in life and maybe you will be happy. But only maybe. I'm sure you won;t find happiness and so you will have to come back to TOM CRUISE! can you belive it?! NO!

I'm just psyched that I won't need my passport to visit my brother in Toronto anymore, since soon it will be the same country!

Don't get too far ahead of yourself, RCR. The only reason we have anything to do with you is it gives us a place to ship our William Shatners, Rich Littles, Paul Shaffers and Celine Dions.

There's very little traffic the other way, and that's not going to change under the new North American Dominion Of Canada.

But by all means do get ready for one- and two-dollar coins and the metric system.

I think this is the best thing that could ever happen to you Gringoes! You come to Mexico anyways to drive your dollar further! Now we can come and work and drive our Dollar further! Thankyou George Bush, But what you did to Iraq against your peoples will does not make you my President! Funny Heh! So much for Democracy in the America's!!!

This blog probably needs a sign that says, "You must have this much sense to enter."

Byoolin the tycoon has spoken showing his Qualifications to say nothing! And that is what this site is all about " Nothing"!
BUT let me say this! God Bless America because if there was ever a time it needed Divine Intervention then it is now!
If Clinton and Obama have said absolutelty nothing about the new America's then we had better all start praying for Christs sake!

I am preparing by being extra polite and figuring out who my favorite hockey team is. Eh?

Yo, carm down. The Morning Mix will be up soon.

Dear Liz kelly, How about doing something about anything pertinent to the matters that count! IE " AMERICA"

Look at me, I'm a TYCOON!

I suppose now I'll have to start growing my hair & nails really long and keep my personal wastes in jars.

But I won't forget all you little people who've helped make me the man Gus thinks I am today. I may even hire some of you to take care of my grooming needs.

Dear MR Tycoon, I am sure that was a mistake, How about Buffoon? Yes thats better , Buffoon. Or Fool on the Hill!

Liz kelly surely George Bush is a Celebrity, How about hanging some of your thoughts on how he has sold America down to the Power Elite,Maily ther Bilderbergs who designed the NEW America's and the Rokerfelleas!?
SURELY IT IS YOUR DUTY , IS'NT IT?

"Bilderbergs"? Is that, like, where you can build your own iceberg?

Liz kelly, you live up to something , Not sure what , Sarcastic Journalism ? is it?
You know what it is, if not then I will have to say we are in trouble!

Where did all the crazies comes from? Is The Fix not up this morning? And Byoolin, you can keep your Celine Dions.

I'm comin' back to mess y'all up, yo! I ain't afraid of Tommy Boy or his mail-order bride.

Lord Xenu! You really belive that crap do you?
25 yrs in Scientology and the only time I have heard of this is on stupid websites from A to Z.
Get a Life!

Wow. (Eh?)

...one- and two-dollar coins and the metric system....
and poutine.

I'm not sure I'm familiar with the Rokerfellas. Do they all do the weather, have weight loss surgery & publish cookbooks?

But what about George Bush?
I mean is he really that immune to the Liz kelly's of the World?
How does he dupe a whole population?
With Media Help from Liz of course!
Texans you let us all down! You're next to Mexico.

Judee, I haven't had my usual dose of morning coffee, so I am very loathe to tolerate someone impugning Texas. Get off the Celebrity Blog you xenophobic (and xenuphobic) nut case.

JES, Where have you been> David Rockerfella built the World Trade Centre in New York . He did not own it when it the twin towers recieved direct hits on 911.
Surley you know that jes!
Yes David Rockerfella one of the Chief Architects of the New America's and the New American money to replace the Greenback.
Hope that helps.

Look you unwelcome lunatics, if you want to talk politics there are several other blogs, try Froomkin, Cohen's good, or even EJ Dionne. This, and I can not stress this enough, is a celebrity blog. This is where we come for relief from our moronic president and his insane policies. You're not coherent, funny or insightful, you're just plain stupid.

Justine, of course we all know who the Rokerfellas are, jes wanted to know about this Rokerfelleas!?

Get with the program, girl.

Anyone else notice all the TC admirers have male names? Coincidence?

And it's very scary that people can't differentiate between hard news and fluff news. Some of us need fluff news. I don't want to read about HRC and BO all day long. Or what natural disaster hit the Earth today. Or how long the war is going on. I want my fluff, too. And the awesome comments that follow. It's all about balance (and not being "On Balance", LOL, go there if you want to fight).

Too funny! Well written. Thanks for the great humor.

David Rockerfella cn be seen on ENDGAME by Alex Jones , showing the meeting in secret in Canada pushing through the "End of the USA " as it is known ans the start of the CANADA, MEXICO, USA UNION! ALL WITHOUT THE APPROVAL OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE BUT THROUGH GEORGE BUSH!
only a Lunatic would not want to do something about this! Don't you think?
I think you can now start trading already with the new Aerican Union money that replaces the Greenback!
But Hell who am I to complain ! We all let it happen! And some people don't want to know about it! I guess we are still Free to be Blind!

OH YES and where can you get " Fair and Balanced" News, Fluff, How about Rupert Murdochs' FOX NEWS!

This is really just too weird. Who are these people? Who goes and digs up posts about Tom Cruise in order to post comments about, like, NAFTA?

But the ROCKERFELLAS ARE THE ROCKERFELLEAS!
Live of us they do!
Every ATM transaction anywhere at anytime has Fleas that is paid to the Rockerfelleas, Did'nt you know that? And how much money is that!? More than you can think with.
Get with the Program God Damn it! You did'nt get it the first time! Got it NOW?!

To who ever. I am a girl and my Name is Justine. It is a French female name. How can you think that is a male name!
Wake up!

And I for one welcome our new Canadian overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves."

Justine, please get back on your meds. You're making no sense.

Between "steve", "JOSH", and "Judee", all we need is for "Che" to come back and we'll have the Four Wackos of the Apocalypse. This board is about how crazy TMC is, folks, not about the voices in your head. Focus people!

To who ever. I am a girl and my Name is Justine. It is a French female name. How can you think that is a male name!
Wake up!

Posted by: Justine | May 7, 2008 9:58 AM

Sorry crazy person (at least I assume you're referring to my post). I should have post "most" of the names for those that have commented in a positive matter are male, but my mind was a little off after reading these strangely bizarre comments.

And for the record, I liked A Few Good Men, Rain Man, heck even Top Gun. We (or at least I) come here because it's fun.

Rokerfelleas
Posted by: JOSH | May 7, 2008 8:57 AM

The name is Rockefeller, genius.

Texans you let us all down! You're next to Mexico.

Posted by: Judee | May 7, 2008 9:31 AM

Ha! Ha! Thanks for the geography lesson.

Every ATM transaction anywhere at anytime has Fleas that is paid to the Rockerfelleas,

Ok so Fleas are paid to the Rokerfelleas but what is paid to the Rokerfellas?

Is WDC 21113 a Prison number or a Psyche ward number! Sorry had to laugh!
But yo9u keep up your end and I will keep up mine!
OK Crazy persons number!

But the ROCKERFELLAS ARE THE ROCKERFELLEAS!
Live of us they do!
Every ATM transaction anywhere at anytime has Fleas that is paid to the Rockerfelleas, Did'nt you know that? And how much money is that!? More than you can think with.
Get with the Program God Damn it! You did'nt get it the first time! Got it NOW?!

Posted by: Justine | May 7, 2008 9:56 AM

OK, this is almost as funny as "Yo fatty, carm down."

Fleas? "Fleas that IS paid to the Rockerfelleas" Good Lord what language is this? I am guessing that the Rockefellers (for that is how you spell it, ok?) do NOT have fleas.

Your village called, their idiot is missing.

that was me at 10:11.

Is WDC 21113 a Prison number or a Psyche ward number! Sorry had to laugh!
But yo9u keep up your end and I will keep up mine!
OK Crazy persons number!

Posted by: Justine | May 7, 2008 10:10 AM

Well, I work in Washington, DC and live in the zip code that's 21113. Hence the code name.

You have a great day now!

Who pays the Rockerfellas? And what are they Paid?
The Loss of your Freedom is what they are paid.
And they probably pay God in the form of a Tithe.

OK ALL you crazy people convinced me to check out ziegheist and that endgame!
I'm depressed now!
So where do I join up to defend the Flag!
Do I still have a Minute to be a "Minute man".
It's not funny!
Shame JFK was the one who got shot!

Maybe the Rockerfelleas could use some Frontline on their shoulders??

I've got my preparations to assimilate with the Canadians in order (plus a reference from Byoolin!) but how do we prepare to be one with Mexico? I'll start with margaritas.

Love TomCat. Great Actor. Don't really care about his personal life. Lot's of angry people here. Way too much caffeine for some. Getting really hopped up about an "actor". Maybe that is good therapy for some. It is quite entertaining though!!! LOL. Let's all try and do something constructive for the rest fo the day. "Peace" !

Maybe all the crazy comments are from the same person, who's just really desperate for attention and/or publicity? They do seem to share a writing style.

I didn't know Washington Post hire retards.

Cruise is so successful that more Tom's tribute on Oprah goes, more some people realize they are just failures.

That is why, as the big losers they are, the only thing they got left in an act of desperation, is to insult.

Insulting someone is the proof you have touch the bottom low and hate yourself.

Hey crazies - here is a tip! Type your comment into a Word document and use the spell check and grammar check features to ensure that your diatribe looks remotely coherent. Another tip: I believe this "End Game" you speak of may be a movie and not a documentary.

Keep up the good work Liz and all of the regular commenters!

Well, the weather's colder in Canada so that might help out with the flea problem.

(I'm totally confused about some of the crazy babble above, but I do know a thing or two about getting rid of fleas.)

My interpretation of the crazy influx is Tom Cruise begets mention of Scientology begets Scientology defenders begets crazy overflow because you have to be looney to defend Scientology. Maybe Scientologist have to do public outreach on blogs the way Mormon youth have to do missionary trips.

Great work, crazy people! You're winning converts and our checkbooks are open!!!

Wait, are we talking about "End Game" with Cuba Gooding Jr and James Woods?

Tom is just Divine!
Liz kelly is just a Journo who makes her money bagging him. So is it any wonder Journalists actaully are barred from doing Scientology even if they really wanted to.
Yes Folks there are people who are barred from being allowed to do any Scientology.
Well look at it! You make your life by eeking out a living picking and picking and picking to death other People who have made a name with their own Blood sweat and Tears, overcoming huge Barriers and when you get to the Top " the Liz Kelly's of the World get paid to pull you apart if you ever made it to the TOP!

Chill people, just chill.

I was able to watch ENDGAME on line. It is not the Movie . It is the Doco by Alex Jones. Same with Zeigheistmovie.
Blew me away!

Hmmm, methinks (er, apologies to the illustrious Methinks) our wackadoo posters don't so much speak ze English as a native language. Pauline, Justine, Helene, Simon, and Steven seem to share the same, uh, unique thought processes and way of articulating them. And they're almost all French names. Clearly they're part of a militant army of Quebecois Scientologists, determined to unite the US, Mexico, and Canada in one French-speaking, TC-worshipping, Thetan-auditing land. Vive la resistance, mes amis!

French-Canadians, it all makes sense now. Didn't byoolin mention last week that his mother was French-Canadian? Could he possibly be a Manchurian poster?

Pauline/Helene/whoever "Liz kelly is just a Journo who makes her money bagging him. So is it any wonder Journalists actaully are barred from doing Scientology even if they really wanted to."

So, wait. Are you saying there are people $cientology *won't* take money from? Now that's news! Get me Ben Bradlee, stat!

And, Liz, I had no idea you were "bagging" TMC. Does Katie know?

I knew you would find out that I am still alive! Living well in Quebec!
I want Canada Back along with Bourbon St in New Orleons and Mexico as a Bonus!
Sacre Bleu!

"Well, the weather's colder in Canada so that might help out with the flea problem."

Ha ha ha ha ha! Hilarious!

This article is FANTASTIC!
TomKat should be known as TomCult. He really must have something on Oprah.

How about that "religion" Scientology? How come Oprah didn't mention his manic laughter as he ranted with the wild fervor of Hitler, "Let's clean up this place!" and went on to talk about the EXTERMINATION of homosexuals?

This lame actor is INSANE in my opinion. BOYCOTT him and anything to do with him because not only is he not worth your hard earned money (which he so desparately wants) - he's DANGEROUS!

That's right Iceman, he is dangerous (snaps teeth together).

Hey ! Can't say this site is not fair and balanced. There's crazy People and Crazier people and then there's the secretative crazy people and just people.

Scientologists should not breed with other Scientologists. This leads to imbreeding, small, shrunken private parts and hallucinations. This is why they must kidnap fresh meat from time to time (like Katie).

AND then there are the really crazy people like Tomcat=tomcult guy.
he's a Homeboy from the looney bin!
Go Homeboy. Guess you won't be going to any of Toms new Movies, Like MI4.
Go home to your Looney Bin Hospital!
I just know you did not take your Medication today! Take it! TAKE IT NOW!!

Okay, just catching up here.
Are we asserting that Tom Cruise is Napoleon? And there's a flea circus at the ATM? And I get to have poutine without going to Canada?
Alsome!

Possum should breed with Tomcult and then we would end up with a Psycho Looney Homeboy Squirrel!
Then shoot it~

endgame is something else!
How come we been lied too?
Liz? where is the Washington Post we we need them?

Well, definitey a Flea circus at the ATM for the benefit of the Rockerfelleas apparently. I'm still not sure what's going on with the Rokerfelleas but I think I will now slowly back out of the post without making any sudden moves.

What about when I get extra cash back at the grocery store? Am I ok with not giving fleas to the Rockerfellers then?

::squints::
Lou Dobbs? Is that you?

Simon says: "Psycho Looney Homeboy Squirrel!"

Wow. Just....wow. I don't even know where to start with that.

Simon also says: "Then shoot it~"

Would you be threatening physical violence to someone, "Simon"? That's a big no-no. Ban him! Ban! Him!

I'm a regular reader and poster to the Lovely Liz's Celebritology chat, but usually don't post here. I just have to say I finally read through all of these posts and love you all. May I be one of you?

I Just realized there are some people who should be stopped from seeing "endgame". And seeing "ziegheistmovie". Well Possum has no IQ and neither does Tomcult. Nah they are not sane enough. But they can be counted on to pretend they saw it and claim higher intelligence afterwards!
Therefore No Possums and No Tomcults.

I'm a regular reader and poster to the Lovely Liz's Celebritology chat, but usually don't post here. I just have to say I finally read through all of these posts and love you all. May I be one of you?

Posted by: beaker | May 7, 2008 11:52 AM

Yes, you can join the Celebritology cult. Welcome. :0)

possum is a regular, beloved poster, she/he may stay. Steveen, you are an interloper, you may go. Good Bye.

Let me clarify--a regular. I want to be a regular, not a crazy.

Beaker, welcome. You're among your people now.

Is there anyone out there who has not gone to the Alex Jones documentary "endgame" to see where all you crazy people fit in the scheme of things?
If you have not yet then go there and see how crazy things really are.

OK, Simon/Steveen/jes/etc. I bit and went to the "endgame" website. After careful scrutiny, my only question is this: do you get a free tinfoil cap when you buy the DVD or do you have to make your own?

No you can still watch the whole doc without buying anything. Just type in endgamemovie.

Rockerfleas -- is that the Chipmunks' back-up band? Or, like, a Canadian Chipmunks knock-off?

j_mas, I'd love to get another "review" of the doc. Streaming vids are blocked for me. Take one for the team and tell us what is up with the Fleas!

Lord, trust me anything Alex Jones made is not a documentary. The man would not know the truth if it came up dressed like Tom Cruise and told him it was the truth. The drugs Jones must be on would make a Scientologist drool.

Sadly Jones' fanatic followers are just as bad as the Scientologists. Same blackmail involved. Although I don't Jones' followers have to pay him. Which means Jones is a bigger idiot than I thought.

Liz kelly who are you? Are you a dime a dozen celebrity Journo who tried to be a Celebrity in your own right and this is as far as you have come? Making fun of others. How do you actually make a living like this? To be able to make or destroy "The Artist"?
What a life!

Apologez. Mah fingrz stikey frm etin chezburgrz.

Well, it seems the fleas are establishing a New World Order...which is really just the Old World Order (it's just like The Who sang: "Meet the New World Order, same as the Old World Order"). Apparently the fleas have been forming this thingy for thousands of years (Makes sense. They are pretty small.). It also seems that they want to kill off 80% of the world's population, to, um, get more power...or something (My guess is that it's because of what we did to them during the Flea Collar Wars. Nasty business, that.) Somehow or another Hitler, Mao, and Queen Victoria are involved. It's a little vague. But it does have a kicking ominous soundtrack and lots of doughy white dudes providing exposition. I was tempted to buy it but I think I'll wait for "Endgame: The Videogame" to come out.

Hello? I'm looking for a really nice Girl to go out, make a date, have a few driks , get frisky and then Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink, Say no more! Back to my place and we can strip a bannana! I'm tall dark and Handsome with incredible strength, able to make fantastic love all night long! Any takers?

Samuel! How do we meet? I'm in Tasmania where Errol Flynn was born.

Sam Sam where haave you been?
I love a tall Dark Handsome nab,
Oh Sam Sam you know where I am?

Wow, j_mas. I've been so worried about ticks, when all along it was the fleas we should have been focusing on. So small, and yet so sneaky.

Come to think of it, Tom Cruise is about the size of a flea. The mind reels.

Girls! I'm here! Where is you?

Oh Gordon, you're so cute [pats Gordon on head] and just a leeeetle late to the game honey. Please take your righteous anger elsewhere. Kthxbai.

...To be able to make or destroy "The Artist"?
What a life!

Posted by: Gordon | May 7, 2008 12:49 PM

Wow, Liz Kelly, I had no idea you had this kind of power. I am so impressed.

Thank you j_man; that was a masterful summary.
Chzburgrz? I has tinfoyl hatz. You can has tinfoyl hatz, is gift.

Beaker was my FAVORITE muppet.

No one better hate on my caps. That was necessary. mee mee mee mee mee.

Beaker was my FAVORITE muppet.

No one better hate on my caps. That was necessary. mee mee mee mee mee.

Posted by: Sigh | May 7, 2008 1:25 PM

Yeah, mine too next to Kermit, that's why I gave the A-OK. For the team. We do need shirts -- Liz needs a clothing line (reference today's AM bits to understand)...Think of all the sayings we could print on them...Alsome.

http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Beaker

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