The must- bookmark blog for your daily dose of celeb- centric news, irreverent analysis and the best celeb-tracking community on the Web.
RSS Feed
Archive: Friday Lists
Friday List: Celeb-Reality Dream Team
Show me a tired out, unemployable D-list celebrity and I'll show you a reality show in the making. Names that once seemed bound for a comfortable level of stardom, but somehow fell short of the mark and were relegated to in-store appearances at suburban malls or, like, robbing dry cleaners. All of that changed when "The Osbornes" ushered in a new era of TV voyeurism: celeb-reality. From Ozzy's home life to Danny Bonaduce's on-camera self-destruction there is a show for every flavor of fan, each one a little more demeaning than the last. Watch the time capsule of red flags that is the "Anna Nicole Smith Show," help Bret Michaels and Flavor Flav find love, get in on the ground floor of Britney and K-Fed's "Chaotic" relationship, watch Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston's drug-fueled daily life, behold as Gene Simmons queues up his kids for years of therapy, amaze yourself...
By Liz | April 11, 2008; 09:39 AM ET | Comments (64)
Friday List: Rehabbing Naomi Campbell
Why is this woman so angry? (Getty Images) Naomi Campbell just can't seem to control her outsized temper. Neither community service nor threats of jail time seem to quell the beast that lurks inside her otherwise picture perfect body. But, because we care, today we will harness our collective problem-solving skills to help this supermodel find her supernice side and stop the violence. In the past few years, Campbell has amassed a growing cross-continental rap sheet for assaulting her assistants, using cell phones as weapons and generally behaving like a spoiled brat in the midst of a 'roid rage. Courtesy Wikipedia, a rundown of Campbell's slap-happy resume (bold is my emphasis): * 2000: she pleaded guilty in a Toronto court to a 1998 assault on Georgina Galanis, her then assistant; Campbell had assaulted Galanis with a telephone in a hotel room and threatened to throw her out of a...
By Liz | April 4, 2008; 10:52 AM ET | Comments (80)
Wednesday List: A Little Advice?
A little advice for Spencer Pratt (seen here with girlfriend Heidi Montag): no one likes PDAs. (Getty Images) I don't really get "The Hills," but I know a good idea when I see it. And that, my friends, is how I was able to finally recognize the value in the easy-on-the-eyes waste of space that is Spencer Pratt. See, Radar online has taken his pretty face and superimposed it on the age-old advice column model. He's hardly the first celeb to dabble in the Hax-ian arts. Jane magazine (R.I.P.) blazed that trail years ago by recruiting male celebs to help readers with boy trouble and Garrison Keillor (kind of the anti-Spencer Pratt) penned the fabulously entertaining Mr. Blue column on Salon.com for years. With Pratt, though, it's not about problems solved so much as a refreshingly dopey party-boy turn of phrase. To sum up his first crack at the...
By Liz | March 26, 2008; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (54)
Tuesday List: Joking With the Stars
Today's task is simple. Simple-minded, even. Using the current celeb news landscape as inspiration, we'll craft a comedy routine on par with Jon Stewart's Oscar monologue -- or at least the next amateur night at the local comedy club. So sharpen your funny bone and make with the ha-ha. And, please, keep it clean. "The Aristocrats," this ain't. Swinton, left, and Combs. Let the hilarity ensue. (AP) The Inspiration: P. Diddy's debut as a leading man in the made-for-TV adaptation of "Raisin in the Sun" and Tilda Swinton's anti-glamour Oscar night look. The Set Up: Sean "P. Diddy" Combs and Tilda Swinton walk into a bar... --- The Inspiration: Lindsay Lohan poses in her altogether in an attempt to recreate an iconic Marilyn Monroe photo shoot. The Set Up: Knock knock. Who's there? --- The Inspiration: Gary Busey's red carpet-owning moment, in which the one-time Oscar nominee busted in on...
By Liz | February 26, 2008; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (37)
Friday Thursday List: Top Movie Romances?
Over the weekend Mr. Liz and I re-watched one of our favorite sappy movies, "Casablanca." There's a lot there to get classic film buffs like us going -- Ingrid Bergman's ridiculously natural beauty, Claude Rains as the wry local law, Peter Lorre as the prototypical low life, Sydney Greenstreet at his slimy best, the lilting airs of "As Time Goes By" and, of course, Bogey as a brooding fish out of water hiding out from the war and his own broken heart in North Africa. But it's that love story that keeps us watching again and again. The sparks between Bogey's Rick and Bergman's Ilsa literally light up the screen. And that's why, at least in my book, "Casablanca's" story of love lost, found and lost again is simply the best movie romance ever. And why Mr. Liz and I play it again and again and again. Since today is...
By Liz | February 14, 2008; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (145)
Friday List: The First Crush is the Deepest
No one rocks a painter's cap like Shaun Cassidy. I must have been about six years old when I taped that Shaun Cassidy poster to the wall. Thirty years later, I can't quite remember how the poster or Cassidy's perky little album -- the unoriginal "Da Doo Ron Ron" -- came into my possession. I only remember moving my Bionic Woman poster to the inside of my closet door, so it would be the eyes of Cassidy staring down at me from the wall alongside my bed as I drifted to sleep each night. Before long, Cassidy inspired my first act of rebellion -- I defaced the wall surrounding the poster with cartoon bubbles reading "I love you, Liz" and "I love you, too, Shawn." Barbie and Ken were recast as Shaun and me and soon both sported mini satin jackets and went roller skating with Parker Stevenson, Leif...
By Liz | January 11, 2008; 10:39 AM ET | Comments (271)
Friday List: Outsized Egos Edition
Alec Baldwin (aka The Bloviator) competes for the room's oxygen supply with Rosie O'Donnell and Barbara Walters during this April 2007 'View' appearance. (Reuters) It's an ugly side effect of fame: celebrities who take themselves way too seriously. Symptoms may include a perception that one can sway an election, write op-eds in major newspapers, sustain a daily blog or spend an hour talking about one's prison experiences on "Larry King Live." In yesterday's Celebritology Live discussion, readers unburdened themselves, disclosing their most personally annoying self-important celebs: "I think Denzel needs an editor and a publicist to keep him intriguing," said one after listening to this NPR interview. "Katherine Heigl," said another, perhaps referring to the actress's recent bite-the-hand-that-feeds-you criticism of "Knocked Up." Alec Baldwin (dubbed "The Bloviator" by the New York Post), the insouciant Gwyneth Paltrow, Michael Douglas, Evangeline Lilly -- all were cited as being shameless self-absorbed attention...
By Liz | January 4, 2008; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (78)
Friday List: 2007's Top Celeb Surprises
Jamie Lynn Spears's pregnancy was only the latest addition to a year rife with Celebritological surprises. Below, the Celebritology Field Agent Guild and I have compiled a list of the items we found most surprising over the last 12 months. Some are silly, some are serious -- all took us by surprise. The list is far from comprehensive, so add your own below. Papa-wow! Kevin Federline. (AP) * K-Fed -- he of the jaw-droppingly inept rap career and Britney's shadow -- emerges as a good parent (at least when compared with baby mamma Britney). He's got primary custody of kids Sean Preston and Jayden James while Brit continues her shame spiral. * Jennifer Love Hewitt and Tyra Banks are fat? So sayeth some seriously dysmorphic "critics." Snark clearinghouse TMZ.com headlined one bikini shot of Hewitt "We know what you ate this summer, Love -- everything!" Nice. * Tony Parker gets...
By Liz | December 21, 2007; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (34)
Friday List: TV Crush Groove 2007 -- Your Nominees?
Naveen Andrews: Hot or not? (AP) It's no secret that at least three of the reasons I'm hooked on "Lost" are named Matthew Fox (Jack), Josh Holloway (Sawyer) and Naveen Andrews (Sayid). There, I said it. I'm as susceptible to three-day stubble and a well-delivered line as the next girl. And any guys out there claiming to watch "Gilmore Girls" for the well-done portrayal of family drama can kiss my tuchus. With that in mind, today we shoulder a momentous task: compiling a list of the top TV crushes of 2007. Ideally, the final list -- based on your submissions -- will be whittled down to five characters from each side of the gender divide and released here on Monday. Don't underestimate the importance of the word "character" here. Yes, Heidi Klum is hot, but we're taking our attraction one step further into fandom to admit crushes on the...
By Liz | November 30, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (210)
Friday List: Dream Show Marathon?
'Ab Fab's' Jennifer Saunders and Joanna Lumley. (AP) washingtonpost.com's new Channel This TV blog is my new go-to spot for post-show analysis of Celebritology-critical TV fare like "Dancing With the Stars," but sometimes the heart longs for the TV of seasons past. That's where EW's Mandi Bierly comes in. Earlier this week, Bierly asked EW readers to share picks for the ultimate dream show marathon. Bierly opted for a non-stop dose of "America's Next Top Model" while commenters' choices were all over the dial -- from the obvious ("Lost") to the mystifying ("Head of the Class"). Today we build upon EW's list by adding our own recommendations (which may come in handy around D.C. this weekend if the rain keeps falling). My picks, in no particular order: - "My So-Called Life" (Angst. Growing pains. Teen romance. Perfection.) - "Absolutely Fabulous" (Love it.) - "Deadwood" (Who can get enough Al...
By Liz | October 26, 2007; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (147)
Friday Follies: Waste a Day the Celebritology Way
List-a-palooza This Friday I present a trio of lists from other sources with which to while away the few short hours until the official start of the weekend. None particularly lends itself to much outside input, but all three are well worth your precious surfing time. 1. Top 10 Topical Halloween Costumes Everyone Will Be Wearing Even Though We Wish They Wouldn't. Best Week Ever presents their list of the season's top annoying and inevitably ubiquitous disguises. From JT's "SNL" song parody to an iPhone to a post-life Anna Nicole Smith, this list is not for the faint of heart (and possibly not safe for work). 2. Worst Movies Directed by Actors. For those of us who didn't realize that Nicolas Cage and William Shatner have both spent time behind the lens, this list is edifying. For those among us who are fans of "Braveheart" and "The Cable Guy," this...
By Liz | October 19, 2007; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (127)
Friday List: Brit-ish Humor
Britney Spears -- Death Eater? (AP) The inspiration for this week's Friday List is the post below by guest blogger (and Discussions producer) Paul Williams, who is able to take a crucial step back from the episodic hype served here daily and make lemonade from Britney Spears's life, which -- of late -- has taken on the general dimensions of a freighter full of lemons. Before one person decries this focus on Brit -- yet again -- consider this. Train wreck or not, Spears is the proud mama (okay, perhaps a bad choice of words) of a hit song. Spears's new single "Gimme More" -- the same song Brit killed with a rusty knife at the last month's Video Music Awards -- is the top downloaded song on iTunes. An anomaly, you say? Hardly. Her song is also comfortably perched at no. 3 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart....
By Liz | October 5, 2007; 11:26 AM ET | Comments (52)
Friday List: Go Ahead, Remake My Day
Russell Crowe's on target performance in the '3:10 to Yuma' remake perfectly illustrates this blog post. Or I just like looking at Russell Crowe. (Lionsgate) Back in April, we compiled a list of movies so sacred that even uttering the word "remake" in their general vicinity constituted a crime against all that is right and good. "Leave alone our 'Escape from New York,'" we said. "Unhand 'Wonder Woman' and 'Hairspray' and shame on you, nameless faceless movie execs for even thinking you could replace Divine. A scant five months later, though, we live in a changed world. A world where the John Travolta-fronted "Hairspray" remake was not only lauded by critics, but a bona fide box office smash, taking over $117 million in domestic box office receipts. Divine who? And, thanks to a kick-butt cast led by Russell Crowe and Christian Bale, the September release of western classic "3:10...
By Liz | September 28, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (70)
Friday List: Inspired Albums
My album cover. (Photo: BBC) Jay-Z is back in the rap game, again. This time the Def Jam mogul, who (ahem) retired in 2003, says his new concept album was inspired by the new Denzel Washington-Russell Crowe flick "American Gangster." "It immediately clicked with me," Jay-Z told the New York Times. "Like 'Scarface,' or any one of those films, you take the good out of it, and you can see it as an inspiring film." Fair enough. But Hova's inspiration has inspired me, too, to create this Friday List asking what movies (or to widen the scope, TV shows) would inspire you to birth your own concept album -- rap, pop, punk or any genre of your choice. We'll just assume everyone participating has the mad skills required to get your brainstorms down on wax. Or MP3. Just one caveat: No movie musicals for inspiration. That's just a little...
By Liz | September 21, 2007; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (96)
Friday List: A Five-Point Plan for Britney
Today we return to the fine tradition of Friday Lists with a constructive project: crafting a comeback plan for beleaguered pop princess Britney Spears. This is Britney's week, so why buck the trend? Is the pre-teen poptart turned bizarro baby mamma past the point of no return? No way, y'all! Unless and until Brit goes all Michael Richards on us, the door is always open for a return to her former chart-topping glory. All it takes is the right alchemy and -- ring-a-ding-a-ling -- MTV, Timbaland and Pepsi will be lining up to get them some of that Louisiana mojo. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is plotting a five-point course for Spears that will return her to that sweet Shangri-la reserved for popsters-who-top-the-charts even-though-no-one-admits-to-owning-their-CDs. Important: Your comeback strategy must outline success in five moves or less. Example: 1. Hire stylists of every flavor -- hair, make-up, clothing,...
By Liz | September 14, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (55)
Friday List: Best Buddies
Batman without Robin, Thelma without Louise, Paris without Nicole -- imagining one without the other is unthinkable. The fabric of the universe would unravel if, say, Laverne turned up at the Shotz brewery minus Shirley or Lenny busted through their basement apartment door without hetero lifemate Squiggy. In short, these duos complete each other and our pop culture lexicon. Today's Friday List comes to us courtesy of New York Magazine's excellent Culture Vulture blog, where editors recently compiled a list of the "15 Most Dynamic Duos in Pop Culture History." The criteria: "No sidekicks allowed! Buddies must be on an equal footing; so long Sancho Panza, Robin, and DJ Jazzy Jeff. Romance is completely off the table, so off went Mulder and Scully, Lyra and Will, Fred and Ginger, and Ennis and Jack. And finally, the buddies must stand alone, not as part of some larger group of near-equal importance;...
By Liz | August 17, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (170)
Friday List: Best High School Flicks
The Disney Channel's flakking of "High School Musical 2" (opening Aug. 17) has kicked into high gear. If you have occasion to turn on that channel, you'll find your tweener sitcoms spiked with a healthy dose of "HSM" promos and behind-the-scenes peeks. And why not? Last year's original was a smash hit for Disney -- kids not only watched over and over, but bought DVDs and made the soundtrack the top-selling album of 2006. And star Zac Efron is everywhere again -- the shining beacon of Disney-built formulaically-perfect "it" boy with his shaggy hair, earnest smile and "It's OK, mom and dad, I'm safe for your kids" vibe. Blech. It's enough to make anyone of voting age dyspeptic. So, like any self-respecting member of a passe generation, I react by comparing this entertainment juggernaut with what the mind leaps to label as "real" high school movies: the ones that got...
By Liz | August 3, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (146)
Friday List: Better Off Dead
Go away, little girl. "Lost's" Kate (Evangeline Lilly) and Jack (Matthew Fox). (Photo courtesy ABC) Sometimes it's okay to hate. Most especially when the hate is directed at a make-believe entity. When it comes down to it, there are lots of reasons to wish a fictional character dead: He's unlikable; she serves no purpose to the plot; his very existence ruins an otherwise well-told tale or, like a pebble lodged in one's shoe, she's just unbearably annoying. Recognizing this, the staff over at New York Magazine's Culture Vulture blog compiled a list of 10 fictional characters that would be better off dead. Their picks range from alleged movie-ruining wet rags like "Spider-Man's" Kirsten Dunst to "24's" Jack Bauer, who wore out his welcome a day (read: season) ago. Today, we'll build on this list by compiling our own fictional character death row. Who would you ax (not literally) if...
By Liz | July 27, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (81)
Friday List: Unlikely Celebritology Headlines
Inspired by smarty-pants Gene Weingarten's Googlenope experiments, McSweeney's hilarious list of lists and a predilection for the absurd, today we convene to create an alternate Celebritology universe, one where anything is possible and the improbable is to be expected. How? By creating a list of headlines we would probably never see in Celebritology. Our mission today is to craft headlines so outrageously unlikely, yet logical enough to make a twisted kind of sense. Like so: Paris Hilton Beats IBM Chess Computer Britney Spears Thanks the Academy, Fans for Top Acting Honor President Willis: 'Yippee-ki-yay, motherf***er.' No More Albums from 11-Years-Dead Rapper Tupac Shakur Frances Bean Cobain Thanks Mom for Solid Start Brad Pitt: Woody Allen an Inspiration You get the idea. The 10 best headlines (as judged by an esteemed panel consisting of me and editrix Nancy Kerr) will be chosen and displayed here Monday. Let's get started......
By Liz | July 20, 2007; 10:42 AM ET | Comments (133)
Friday List: DIY Talking Keychains
(Courtesy fredflare.com) Who can resist the charm of a talking keychain? Not I, the owner of both Mr. T and Napoleon Dynamite keychains that regularly figure into my conversations by interjecting random phrases like: "I pity the fools" and "Lucky!" Both were gifts from Mr. Liz (who must be saving the jewelry for some future birthday or anniversary). This morning, though, as I pondered waking him up by blasting "Can you bring me my chapstick" right in his ear, I started to wonder... if I could design a talking keychain based on a movie or TV character, who would it be and what would it say? As expected, the talking keychain market is awash with some of pop culture's most quotable characters -- from "Lord of the Rings'" Gollum ("My precious.") to Scarface ("Say hello to my little friend.") to "The Office" ("Ooo. Discipline. Kinky."). There's even an Andy...
By Liz | July 13, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (74)
Friday Lists: For Your Consideration
This Friday, three lists currently making the rounds of pop culture sites and e-mail boxes are summarized below: 25 Movies with Real Impact In their ongoing series of 25th-anniversary lists, the USA Today staff has compiled a list of the most important movie moments from the last quarter-century. I'm on board with the list-topping "Lord of the Rings" trilogy, but "The Cable Guy," "Total Recall" and -- I kid you not -- "The Bodyguard?" 100 Days That Changed Music Blender magazine says that without these 25 watershed musical moments, we'd have "no mp3s, no LSD, no hip-hop, no soul-sucking corporate rock." Everything from January 31, 1955 (RCA demonstrates the first synthesizer) to November 16, 1985 (the day Starship's "We Built This City" reached No. 1). Don't worry -- this comprehensive list includes "Pet Sounds," the iPod, the Sex Pistols and the Sugarhill Gang. I think we approve. Springfield's Best Kudos...
By Liz | July 6, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (38)
Friday List: Worst Cover Songs Ever
Well do I remember the Saturday night in 1998 when I recoiled in horror as P. Diddy (then known as "Puff Daddy") furiously "rapped" over Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir", backed by Jimmy Page (sellout) and a complement of classical musicians. How had this abomination happened? Where was Robert Plant and why was he not rushing out on stage to best P. Diddy Daddy with his own honey-dripping Viking-inspired wail? I think I passed out in pain sometime after Diddy tore off his jacket in rage and uttered his 432nd "Ya." See how long you can stand it: Nine years later, my gut feeling has at last been validated by Web site Retrocrush, which compiled an ungodly list of the 100 Worst Cover Songs Ever. Diddy's take on "Kashmir" is there, though it only made it to no. 96 on the list. Other dishonorees include Kelly Osbourne for her cover of Madonna's...
By Liz | June 22, 2007; 10:02 AM ET | Comments (144)
Friday List: Call to Action
Another Friday, another "best of" list to lay to waste. Sigourney vs. Bruce? Our money's on Ripley. (Courtesy 20th Century Fox) This week, Entertainment Weekly has incurred our god-like wrath for daring to top a list of the best action movies ever made with "Die Hard." Ignoring the uncomfortable fact that the latest installment in the series, "Live Free or Die Hard," coincidentally opens in just two weeks and that EW also includes an interview with star Bruce Willis in the same issue, we'll give EW's editors the benefit of the doubt and confine our refutation to systematically dismantling their list and rebuilding it in the form of the one truly righteous list, a list topped by a movie that doesn't include Willis in a wife beater, Mel Gibson in a mullet or an abominable Keanu Reeves-Sandra Bullock pairing. Here's EW's list, hot off the presses: 1. "Die Hard" (1988)...
By Liz | June 15, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (79)
Friday List: Movie Title Mashups
Timeless. (Jonathan Mannion -- Govinda Gallery) As improbable as it may sound, I want to be an amalgamation of William Powell and Jay-Z when I grow up. (Yes, I realize I'm 34 and time is running out.) So I was sipping a PBR down at Solly's Tavern, sitting next to Mac the Movie Man (Mac watches movies on a portable DVD player; this night it was "The Magnificent Seven") and becoming increasingly stressed about how to describe my dream of channeling my heroes to Liz's gentle readers. (Seriously, Powell and Jay-Z could have a smooth-off. Dapper duds, rapier wit and magnums of Dom Perignon at two paces. Like that scene from "Zoolander" except better.) Suddenly, Mac exclaimed, "What if they crossed 'The Magnificent Seven' with 'Ocean's 11'?" And there it was: Crisis averted! Topic discovered! Friday List found: Movie Title Mashups. He went through all of that just to...
By Michael Corones | June 8, 2007; 11:30 AM ET | Comments (87)
Friday List: The Dream Theme
Concept drawing of Hogwarts. (Photo courtesy Universal Studios) As reported in this morning's Mix, Universal Studios yesterday announced plans to open a Harry Potter theme park in 2009 -- finally creating a long-overdue Mecca for rabid Potter fans. Visitors will lose themselves in a "fully immersive Harry Potter themed environment" that will include recreations of Hogwarts, Hogsmeade Village, the Forbidden Forest and offer "experiential shops and restaurants that will enable guests to sample fare from the wizarding world's best known establishments." Not being much of a Harry Potter fan, though, I'm left cold by the thought of seing a faithful facsimile of Dumbledore's office, let alone surrendering my ducats to J.K. Rowling's sprawling empire. Surely, we can do better by crafting a wish list of movies that deserve the theme park treatment. To get us started, I took a quick survey of a few trusted Celebritology field agents. A...
By Liz | June 1, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (81)
Friday List: The Best Soundtracks
(Courtesy Fontana London) The gunna-gunk gunna-gunk, gunna-gunk gunna-gunk first few riffs from Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir" instantly conjures up visions of the interior of Mike Damone's car in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" and I'm similarly transported by songs from the other varied soundtracks taking up space on my iPod. Songs from movies like "Jesus' Son" and "Rize" share space with pre-adolescent favorites like "Camelot," "Xanadu" and my first know-it-all-by-heart soundtrack, "Grease." Hip or cheesy, loaded with subtext or unapologetically meaningless, movie soundtracks are often entry points into a genre and I have many directors I'd like to thank for sparking lifelong love affairs with artists like Cat Stevens and Mudhoney. Today's mission is to list our favorite movie soundtracks. You'll receive bonus points for including your reasons. As usual, I'll start: "Donnie Darko" -- Sadly, the official soundtrack only included the original score, so I had to craft my...
By Liz | May 18, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (145)
Friday List: A Little Help for Sanjaya
Might we recommend the 'Don Juan De Marco' look for Saturday night's festivities? (Fox TV) "What would you do if I sang out of tune? Would you stand up and walk out on me?" -- The Beatles. Sanjaya Malakar needs a little help from his friends. Malakar, he of the novelty hair and shaky vocals, is coming to D.C. tomorrow night to attend the annual White House Correspondents Dinner. As a guest of People magazine, Sanjaya will doubtlessly be this year's most-talked-about attendee. Even now I can picture hordes of low-level cable news staffers hunting the Hilton's honeycomb of event rooms to catch a pre-dinner glimpse of 17-year-old reality TV sensation. One can only hope that photo ops include shots of the gangly teen with dinner regulars. ("Helen Thomas, you're on candid camera!") Sanjaya isn't the first "Idol" castoff to attend the event. A couple of years ago, I'll...
By Liz | April 20, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (33)
Friday List: Celluloid Celebrity
Gloria Swanson in 'Sunset Blvd.' (Paramount Pictures) Not all Friday Lists are intended as cathartic releases. Some -- like these lists of Sad Songs and tips on How to Survive a Horror Flick -- also fall into the category of service journalism. I, for one, consider myself enriched: my iPod is now extra mopey and I have been duly warned to give three-year-olds who speak Latin, Ancient Aramaic, Scytho-Khotanese or any other extinct language a wide berth. This Friday, we'll build on the spirit of goodwill by compiling a list of the best movies about life in front of the lens. From Woody Allen's "Celebrity" to J.Lo's "Selena," which films stand out as illuminating peeks into the surreal world of the entertainment industry and its attendant fame? Help me -- and each other -- compile a syllabus for a celebrity cinema master class. As usual, I'll start by sharing...
By Liz | April 13, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (66)
Friday List: Don't Remake This Movie
There seems to be no escape from remakes. (AVCO Embassy Pictures) Quite possibly you heard it: The sound of legions of faithful "Escape from New York" fans shuddering in unison after learning that "300's" Gerard Butler will star as Snake Plissken in a remake of "Escape from New York." For those few uninitiated souls out there who somehow managed to make it to 2007 without experiencing "Escape," the 1981 original stands as an unparalleled masterpiece of B-movie fare. To compare it to its peers of the same era: If "Mad Max" was post-apocalyptic and edgy, "Escape" was post-apocalyptic and cheesy. If "Blade Runner" was a "cyberpunk vision of the future," "Escape" was the low-rent dream of kids turning off disco and turning on to leather jackets. If "Star Wars" was the ground-breaking first installment of George Lucas's storied trilogy, "Escape," too, spawned a mini-empire for director John Carpenter, who...
By Liz | April 6, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (121)
Guilty Pleasure: Movies to Watch Again and Again
(Image courtesy Paramount Pictures) The first time I saw "Airplane" it was projected on the wall of my family's villa in Italy. I was maybe nine years old and thought an inflatable autopilot, a guy who spilled drinks down his face and, well, feces hitting a fan was hi-larious. As I matured, I found new nuances to delight me in "Airplane" -- the teen me felt smug recognizing cameos from Barbara Billingsley, Kareem Abdul Jabar and a young Joe Izuzu (David Leisure). As an adult, I snicker at the subtle (and not so subtle) dialogue and I have finally come to appreciate Julie Hagerty. I've also been known to fast forward through the DVD to hear the lines from Stephen Stucker's Johnny ("I can make a hat or a brooch or a pterodactyl.") "Airplane" is just one of the movies contained in a box I keep close at hand....
By Liz | March 30, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (326)
Friday Task: Cast a New Mötley Crüe
(Harper Collins) A ray of metallic sunshine entered our lives last fall when rumors of a movie based on the Mötley Crüe bio-book "The Dirt" began coalescing into actual pre-production and "Borat" director Larry Charles (whose impressive resume also includes "Seinfeld," "Entourage," "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and "The Tick") was attached to the project. But, since then, not much has happened to this Holy Grail of rock tales, which holds the promise of "This Is Spinal Tap," "The Decline of Western Civilization Part II" and "Almost Famous" rolled into one big fat decadent hair band orgy. The movie's IMDB page hasn't been updated in months and once solid buzz about Christopher Walken's being hired to portray Ozzy Osbourne is now shaky at best. Vince Neil, Nikki Sixx, Tommy Lee and Mick Mars celebrate the unveiling of their star on the Walk of Fame. (AP) Call me a dreamer, but my...
By Liz | March 23, 2007; 10:53 AM ET | Comments (32)
Friday List: Sweet-Sounding Guilty Pleasures
Just admit it: We all (heart) Abba. (Copyright Torbjorn Calvero) A couple of weeks ago I was talking with one of washingtonpost.com's head honchos (a hip kind of guy who defies comparisons to Ricky Gervais or any kind of Dilbertian manager in that he is certainly above being swayed by base flattery) at a company event (whose swank factor was not at all affected by drinking wine out of paper cups) about some of the more embarrassing songs we happen to have on our iPods. What started as a passing reference to the Starland Vocal Band ("Afternoon Delight") and my current obsession with "Itchycoo Park" soon morphed into a conversational one-upsmanship featuring a smorgasbord of cheesy songs of yesteryear. Often we can't explain exactly what it is that makes a particular cheesy song so appealing. Sometimes it's an infectious chorus or a musical hook that just gets you in...
By Liz | March 9, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (185)
Friday List: Celeb-Zeros -- Running on Fumes
Hey, Charo was on 'Fantasy Island' twice. (20th Century Fox Television) In yesterday's Celebritology Live chat, some anonymous genius posed this fabulous question: Who invented this notion of people who are famous for being famous? I'm not sure who invented the notion, but over the years we've been subjected to or fascinated with an array of talentless, yet seemingly ubiquitous, celebrities. The current crop of celeb-zeros is presided over by Paris Hilton, who has managed to turn her lack of skills into a cottage industry, spawning a (relatively contrived) reality show and a lucrative sideline as a paid party guest. And she's not alone -- gossip pages now regularly track the sons and daughters of the famous, recording every drunken revel or, umm, parachute jump to feed our inexplicable appetite for these empty calories. Yesterday's chatters came up with the start of a fabulous Friday list, dropping names like...
By Liz | February 23, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (100)
Friday List: Stars We Hate to Love
A couple weeks back I unwittingly set off a torrent of star-hating when I unburdened myself of a lifelong, and somewhat inexplicable, aversion to Diane Keaton. Three-hundred-plus comments later, an initially tentative response had morphed into a cacophony of contempt by the end of the day. I only can imagine if I had detailed my much deeper abhorrence of Dabney Coleman. The mind reels. (Aside: In an informal and highly unscientific count Angelina Jolie emerged as the most-hated celebrity for Celebritology readers. She was closely trailed by Oprah Winfrey and the "insouciant" Gwyneth Paltrow.) Although we offered up varied reasons for our loathing, the common thread was an immediate and visceral dislike. Today, after prompting from Celebritology readers, we turn this mother upside down and -- keeping in mind that this is a (mostly) anonymous forum -- come clean about the stars we hate to love. Yet again, Liz takes...
By Liz | February 16, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (232)
Hump Day Snow Day Valentine's Day Wednesday List
Violets are blue, Roses are red, Get in on the list, If you're not still in bed. (For real poetic artistry, see last post) In a survey of 5,000 Australians, more than 70 percent of respondents (of both sexes) said they'd rather spend Valentine's Day with their partner than a celebrity dream date. While fidelity is commendable, we here in the land of list-making know that there's nothing wrong with a healthy imagination and today we'll get our creative juices flowing by compiling a list of fantasy dream dates. We could opt for the obvious and name our celebrity dream dates ("and then Russell Crowe would duel the "Donnie Darko"-era Jake Gyllenhaal for my affection"), but why make this a rehash of our top fives? To give this list a little twist, we'll make the objects of our affection completely unattainable: If you could spend Valentine's Day with one fictional...
By Liz | February 14, 2007; 10:45 AM ET | Comments (154)
Friday List: Your 'Idol' Audition
If I hear one more rendition of "Unchained Melody" sung by some poor misguided "American Idol" hopeful, I will turn off my TV and go read a book. There, I've said it. Take that, Simon Cowell. And you, too, Simon Fuller. Do you hear me? The songs chosen by contestants and put through to the audition room by your pre-screeners are a big yawn. Not that I'd expect anything more from a show that stocks its judges panel with "Forever Your Girl" singer Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson, who toured with Journey and thinks "What's up, dawg" is still an au currant catchphrase. So when I saw this post on EW.com earlier this week asking readers what song they would choose to sing if given the chance to audition for "Idol," well, I knew we had the makings of a Friday List. My choices: "Putty in Your Hands"/The Shirelles "Down...
By Liz | February 2, 2007; 10:44 AM ET | Comments (89)
Friday List: Picture This
The Brady Bunch -- Alice, Carol, Bobby, Marsha, Peter, Cindy, Mike, Greg, Jan and Cousin Liz. (Photo illustration by Liz Kelly) When I was six I had a serious desire to live with the Brady Bunch. The groovy Brady homestead rocked (I so wanted Greg Brady's teen attic pad with a beaded curtain instead of a real door) and despite some slight intervention from Carol, Mike, and Alice, the Brady household was ruled by a sort of "Lord of the Flies" childhood law. I would be cousin Liz, the cool, accepted seventh Brady -- not a bad-luck magnet like that dorky Cousin Oliver. As a pre-teen, I yearned to attend Eastland Academy with Blair, Tootie, Jo, Natalie and the other girls on "Facts of Life," wear cute uniforms and escape the awkward reality of junior high in Pemberton, N.J. By high school, I was so jonesing to be a...
By Liz | January 26, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (128)
Friday List: Worst-Rhyming Lyrics Ever?
Bob Dylan: King of rock or ruiner of rhymes? (AP) Today's Friday list may have a detrimental side effect: There is a slight risk of getting sub-par song lyrics stuck in your head. This is a risk we must take, however, if we are to consider and expand on Cracked.com's list of the 20 worst rhymes in pop music history. The list contains a few real stinkers -- "I'm like a bowl of gumbo/You ain't hotter than this/I'm what they play in the clubo" (Mariah Carey, "Don't Stop" ) -- and gives top honors to Bob Dylan for his "contacts"/"lumberjacks"-rhyming "Ballad of a Thin Man." But I'm not convinced that the bulk of the songs on the list have committed any grave transgression. This is pop music we're talking about, so Jimmy Buffett's "flip flop"/"pop top" rhyme in "Margaritaville" doesn't detract from the experience (which, for the record, is...
By Liz | January 19, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (167)
Friday List: Dumbest Movie Moments
I've been saving this Friday list topic for a rainy day and, at least in D.C., that day is today. I can think of nothing I'd rather do than curl up with my laptop and a hot cup of tea and spend the day getting listy with you. To that end, please turn your attention to exhibit A: Amazing Planet's list of the 49 Dumbest Movie Moments. Though a dumb enough skydiving sequence from "Point Break" tops this list, some entries are a stretch. For instance, I don't think I'd have included Jodie Foster's space travel scene from "Contact" or "Cape Fear's" climax. Where are the moments that completely ruin the mood and shatter movie magic? Where is Patrick Swayze saying "Nobody puts Baby in the corner" in "Dirty Dancing" or "Top Gun's" Tom Cruise singing "You've Lost That Loving Feeling" or pretty much any scene from "Waterworld?" I think...
By Liz | January 5, 2007; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (203)
Friday List: Sad Songs
Sad songs. They say so much. (Or so sang Elton John in his mid-80's paean to the sappier side of the musical spectrum.) And obviously others agree. A new "scientific" study has named The Verve's "The Drugs Don't Work" as the saddest rock/pop song ever. Here's the full Brit-centric list: 1. The Verve - "The Drugs Don't Work" 2. Robbie Williams - "Angels" 3. Elton John - "Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word" 4. Whitney Houston - "I Will Always Love You" 5. Sinead O'Connor - "Nothing Compares 2 U" 6. Will Young - "Leave Right Now" 7. Elvis Presley - "Are You Lonesome Tonight?" 8. Christina Aguilera - "Beautiful" 9. James Blunt - "Goodbye My Lover" 10. Radiohead - "Fake Plastic Trees" I dunno about the above list, but I think Sir Elton has a point. There seems to be a sad song for every emotional let down...
By Liz | December 15, 2006; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (249)
Friday List: A Star-Studded Wish List
If he only had a brain. (Photo illustration by Mr. Liz for washingtonpost.com) Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore because Kevin Federline is making news for trying to become a better person. Yep, you heard that right, K-Fed -- borrowing a page from "The Wizard of Oz's" Scarecrow -- is trying to get his own brain. If K-Fed's fondest wish is for a little gray matter to fill his empty head, what quality or essential item do stars like Paris Hilton, Britney Spears and Jennifer Aniston need to head into 2007 stronger than ever? This Friday we'll play the role of the Great and Powerful Oz by identifying the one thing celebrities need to be complete this holiday season. To get the list started, below are a few examples compiled with Celebritology field agent Frank Thomason: Britney Spears: Maturity (though a publicist would be a close second)....
By Liz | December 8, 2006; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (46)
A Musical List Smorgasbord
Long-time Celebritology readers know there's nothing I like more than a list. What is more satisfying than second-guessing someone else's taste? Not much, it turns out. We've been critiquing lists here for the better part of a year now and, may I be the first to say, we have impeccable taste. I couldn't agree with us more. Today, we have a trio of music-related lists to dissect: Teen Spirit, the Bestest Smell Fans of "I'm Too Sexy" might want to sit down: Nirvana grunge-breaking "Smells Like Teen Spirit" was named the best pop song of the last two decades by Britain's Q magazine. To make the list a song must have been released in the past 20 years and be "instantly memorable." Which explains why stinkers like Britney Spears's "...Baby One More Time" and Eminem's "Stan" made the list. Twice As Nice If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,...
By Liz | November 30, 2006; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (86)
List: Top 100 Albums of All Time?
Apparently sub-par band Pink Floyd in 1973. (From "The Dark Side of the Moon") It's Tuesday, so it must be time for a Friday list. In a convoluted Liz-logic sort of way this does make sense, see, because I won't be here Friday so we need to make hay while the sun shines, carpe diem, gather rosebuds and whatnot. So, on this browser page it's Friday and we're in list mode. I saw Time's all-time top 100 album list last week, but we were so busy getting ready for TomKat that it would've been lost in the shuffle. It's worth a look, but IMHO there's a lot amiss with this list. The albums aren't ranked, but divided by decade. I guess we're meant to draw some kind of conclusion from the fact that of the nine albums listed as 2000s releases, four are compilations of older artists (Hank Williams,...
By Liz | November 21, 2006; 10:36 AM ET | Comments (135)
Friday List: Elvis's Pound Cake and More Famous Food
Let's pound some cake. Thankyouverymuch. (Mark Finkenstaedt/The Post) Earlier this week, a friend and I ('sup, Francine?) were instant messaging about Thanksgiving and girding our bellies for some power-eating when she stopped the conversation by casually mentioning Elvis Presley's Favorite Pound Cake, which she proceeded described thusly: "You eat it and you feel the weight walking across the room afterwards." This triggered a memory for me: Years ago, Martha Stewart looking on in horror as Aretha Franklin concocted her Queen of Soul Ham -- complete with ginger ale, coconut, yellow mustard and an entire box of brown sugar -- on one of the now defunct Martha primetime holiday specials. So, of course I started thinking about celebrities and food and dishes endorsed by or inextricably tied to certain stars. So I started Googling and something weird happened. I noticed that many of the recipes linked to a particular celebrity...
By Liz | November 17, 2006; 10:44 AM ET | Comments (25)
The Horror, the Horror: Before They Were Stars
I've pretty much done Halloween-themed posts to death here, but since today is actually Oct. 31 and all, I was hoping we could carry the theme for one more day. Jamie Lee Curtis hoists her weapon in 1978's 'Halloween.' (AP) I had been planning a long dissection of exactly what went wrong between Reese and Ryan, but then I saw this Radar list of the 10 Best Horror Villains of All Time, which -- in a roundabout kind of way -- got me thinking about stars who appeared in cheesy horror pics before their careers took off. See, I was thinking about whether or not I agreed with Radar's pick of Freddy Krueger as the top villain which of course got me thinking about a young Johnny Depp, who starred in "Nightmare on Elm Street's" first installment lo these 22 years ago. And from Johnny, it was just a quick...
By Liz | October 31, 2006; 10:44 AM ET | Comments (22)
Friday List: How to Survive a Horror Flick
Sadly,"The Blair Witch Project's" Heather Donahue didn't have our rules. (AP) Okay, you're being chased by a club-footed vampire zombie with a chainsaw. Your options are to run into the woods, hide in a dark mineshaft or turn and face him with only a fork as a weapon. What do you do, hotshot? What - do - you - do? Since we all cringe every time a "victim" seals his or her fate, surely we're the go-to experts on how to outwit those zombies, maniacal killers, possessed personages and P.O.'d dead janitors, right? Okay then, smartie, share your rules for how to survive a horror film -- as few or as many as you like. I'll start: 1. Don't babysit at homes more than half-an-acre away from another house or busy road. 2. Do not ever, under any circumstance, have sex or engage in any other kind of love-making....
By Liz | October 27, 2006; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (97)
List: The Most-Stylish Movies
It's Tuesday so it must be time for another Friday list! Or maybe I'm willing to do just about anything to avoid writing about Madonna's continuing adoption saga ("Malawi Tops Kazakhstan as Most-Talked-About Country No One Can Pinpoint on a Map") or Jennifer Aniston's Oprah gabfest ("No New Boobs and Vince Stays in Relationship"). Though I would probably pay good money to write -- at length -- if the two stories somehow intersected ("Aniston Breaks Up with Malawi, Contemplates Boob Job.") Fashion icon Cary Grant. (Viking Press/MGM) Alas, no such luck. So let's do the next best thing: turn our attention to GQ's new list of the most stylish movies of all time, movies that had a lasting impact on the way we dress. Not surprisingly, a film starring possibly the most debonair man ever to walk the Earth tops the list: Cary Grant and "North By Northwest." Eighteen movies...
By Liz | October 17, 2006; 10:44 AM ET | Comments (54)
Friday List: Goodbye Songs
Today's Friday list was inspired by this beaut from across the pond: Britain's Bereavement Register announced that James Blunt's "Goodbye My Lover" tops a list of songs played at funerals. A look at the full list (below) makes it clear that a British funeral is now officially as boring as the music piped into my dentist's office. Still, this does force one's mind to consider the set list for one's own, ahem, sendoff. Depending on the desired reaction, music is one surefire way to render your post-partum guests elated, sad, wracked with guilt or -- if you're completely sadistic -- appalled. So, today's list: Choose 1 - 3 songs you'd want played at your final farewell. I'm actually having a hard time (I think the mental image of someone playing the "Dirty Dancing" theme song at a funeral is blocking my creative juices), so I'll stick with one song for...
By Liz | October 6, 2006; 10:45 AM ET | Comments (165)
Friday List: TV Casualties
Ah, fall. Suddenly the world -- at least within a two-mile radius of D.C. -- has gone all cool air, pumpkins, mums and new TV season debuts. The husband and I have been feverishly rearranging our lives -- and DVR -- to handle a whole new schedule. Already, we have some good ("The Simpsons," "COPS"), some bad ("Men in Trees") and some ugly ("Survivor"), but we're still awaiting a few yet to debut. Since it's Friday, I thought TV proclivities might make for a great Friday list. Specifically, TV casualties of two kinds: 1. No matter how many of us profess a desire to curb our TV habit, most tend to sacrifice at least some small part of our lives to at least one show -- be it sitcom, Adult Swim or Stephen Colbert. Hence, we are TV casualties. 2. The other variety of TV casualty: the quality entertaining show...
By Liz | September 22, 2006; 10:43 AM ET | Comments (113)
Friday List: Rename Supernova
Okay, I swear this will be the last you hear from me about "Rock Star" until next season. Unless something really crazy happens on tour and, of course, when they rename the band. As we all know by now, the band made the baffling decision to take both Lukas and Dilana on tour (Dilana will front the House Band. I'm sure they're overjoyed) But, I'm not here to wring my hands about the bad decisions of others because, really, why should I stress about something out of my control? I won't go on about how Lukas looks like his outfits -- right down to the studded half-glove thingy -- were issued by a stylist who has punk'd him big time (and I mean this kind of punk'd). I won't waste precious space talking about his staggering, doubled over way of careening around the stage or his over-emoted wailing. All I...
By Liz | September 15, 2006; 10:44 AM ET | Comments (33)
Sizing Up Movie Musicals
Today is a momentous day in the history of television, what with Rosie and Katie's big debuts. That's why I thought it would be a good idea to turn our attention to something completely different and of much more pressing import: movie musicals. Judy Garland warbles a little song about rainbows in 1939's "The Wizard of Oz." (AP/Warner Bros. Pictures) The American Film Institute (AFI) has been up to its old tricks again, releasing yet another list created, it would seem, solely to vex the movie-loving public. This time the group has listed what it deems to be the "25 Greatest Movie Musicals of All Time." AFI's list is topped by "Singin' in the Rain," which is a fine film, but no "Sound of Music" (which surprisingly only rated as fourth best). The top five is rounded out by "West Side Story," "The Wizard of Oz" and "Cabaret." (Full List)...
By Liz | September 5, 2006; 10:45 AM ET | Comments (54)
