'Project Runway' -- One Fan's Rant: Pleather 'Tis Nobler...

It's really becoming rather embarrassing, honestly. Just look at it, hanging out there, unsightly and unseemly, the ghastliest of baffling design flaws. We speak not of the contestants' silhouettes, but rather of the very set-up of "Project Runway's" Team Challenges.

This is a woefully rogue problem -- one that rests squarely at the BlueFly'd feet of those who devise the show's competitions. If you're listening, Heidi and Harvey, the Bazillion-Dollar Question is:

WHY, pray tell, would anyone ever, ever volunteer to be Team Leader on this show? Why, that is, should one dare become the boss?

We ask on the heels of last night, when Team Leader Chris was Auf'd and fellow Team Leader Ricky came perilously close to that fate: To lead or not to lead, that is the question. (Pleather 'tis nobler to suffer the slings and arrows of Nina Garcia?)

Ponder it for a sec: What possibly are the advantages? Do you get a matched set of immunities? A corner workspace closer to Tim Gunn's office? An executive parking spot at the New Gotham Apartments?

Near as we can tell: No, no and a big ol' negatory. But what you do often get for all your leadership troubles are major grief from "teammates," several Excedrin PM head-throbbers and a big-time case of Sitting Duck. That's right: Come Auf-You-Go time, the lesser Team Leaders become the Unmoving Targets (save their perspiring upper lips). The Clay Pigeons. The Nearly Departed. And often are the first to dive atop the design bomb to save the other poor bastards hunkered in their bunker.

Well, danke-but-no-danke, Heidi-K. In the early rounds, we'll take the humility and the chance to live on to hem another day.

(It's the same question that many of us -- ahem -- mull long and carefully before leaping into management: What are the risks and rewards? In the case of "Runway," the equation is nearly as unbalanced as former contestant Andre.)

Not convinced? Let's break it down. But take cover, Steven Covey, because we're entering Dilbert Country. Last night, the contestants grouped into four teams of three, and from their travails, we've culled and collated The Show's Five Habits of Highly Defective Challenges:

1. THOU SHALT NOT SUFFICIENTLY REWARD THE "GOOD BOSS":
In leading teammates Rami and Kevin to "Outdated Design Challenge" victory, '70s-lovin' Jillian fretted over Kevin's time management but ultimately proved to be a big enough person to praise him for his "amazing" save (as the team
deftly blended elements of overalls, poodle skirt and '70s flare). The show should pony up and give her either twin immunities or the largest bill in guest-judge Donna Karan's stylish purse.

2. FAIL TO REWARD THOSE WHO FINISH WITH DIGNITY INTACT:
Week by week, Elisa's growing in our estimation--as a Person of Character as much as a designer. (And if she's any indication, that "home planet" of hers must be a pretty decent place to live, "sculpt" and do yoga.) Elisa nobly told the judges she would take the bullet for her team (though with her, it probably would have occurred in rather cool, "Matrix"-style fashion). C'mon, Kors: At least give the authentic Elisa a little more (hotel) room to do her morning Sun Salutations.

3. DO NOT PENALIZE THE UNDERMINER:
We like Victorya, but apparently addled by her lack of respect for Ricky, she wrongly sought to have it both ways: She wanted the lion's share of the design "credit" but attempted to skirt nearly all the blame for the
team's failure (and foist it onto Team Leader Ricky). Of course, this is all probably now on "her permanent record" with the judges, but really, a fairer and stiff penalty: Victorya should have to buy (and carry home) a week's
Walmart-sized supply of Ricky the Weeper's Kleenex.

4. DO NOT PENALIZE THE PETTY:
As the Ricky/Victorya ("Rictorya"?) duo squabbled, Ricky got mighty small-minded (even under that ever-present cap) when he said Victorya should be Auf'd rather than himself. A fair and stiff penalty: Ricky should have
to launder all of Victorya's black garments for a week.

5. DO NOT HONOR THE BEST TEAMWORK:
Yes, they got the satisfaction of finishing in a virtual "second place," but Team Christian's members got on so famously and funnily during the challenge (melding zoot suit, fringe and pleather) that they should have been comp'd for a night on the town: perhaps all they can party in the Meatpacking District.

Well, as long as they all promised to wear pleather.

Last night's show shined a klieg light on noble leadership (as ironic as that might sound coming from a Harvey Weinstein show). Now it's the show's creators who need to lead well and fix "PR's" biggest design flaw. In other words: Time to take your own advice, Tim. Make it work.

-- MICHAEL CAVNA, TV Editor

By Michael Cavna |  December 6, 2007; 2:35 PM ET Project Runway
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