'Top Chef': The Nacho Souffle

So Bravo does a solid by all us post-strike, still-famished-for-fresh-fare viewers and immediately replaces our beloved Christian Siriano and his "Project Runway" fierceness with a new season of "Top Chef." So we begin this with gratitude.

Geting a sense of all 16 newbies in the debut is challenging, but it's apparent there are a few front-runners for what we dub the "TMH" crown -- as in Tiffani, Marcel and Hung, three contestants from the first three seasons. They were brilliant and obnoxious and pretentious, alienating their fellow contestants in the process. (Note to future entrants: All three made it to the finals, and Hung won the competition. There is no downside to being a jerk here if you have the cooking chops to back it up).

Tonight's winner is "Scared Stephanie," who all but needs Ativan in order to sauce her version of duck a l'orange. She's pretty wimpy but apparently she can cook, at least when it comes to a basic. Her Quickfire Challenge entrant -- the contestants make deep-dish Chicago pizza after eating some at Uno's -- is so off that judge Rocco DiSpirito is moved to comment: "I smell something funny."

Side note: Can we keep Rocco on as a regular judge? Ms. Food and Wine (Gail Simmons) is all nice and whatnot, but only with Rocco are we going to get comments such as, "It wasn't only his gnocchi that were dense." Yowser! We want more.

Back to the competition: The guy we think is going home is Mr. Tattoo Man (Eric), whose manliness is clearly so offended by having to make a souffle that he turns it into a nacho fest, suitable to be served with beers on the first Thursday of NCAA March Madness. Yet in a spectacular gift to viewers, the judges decide to dispatch mealy-mouthed Nimma, and Eric lives on another day. Nimma comes across as so pathetic and self-doubting from the get-go that it is "lovely" (lovely and pitiful are the two descriptions that come quickly to mind in her case) to know she won't be around.

In an elimination challenge that asked the chefs to go head-to-head by cooking classics (for poor Eric, that meant the souffle; for others, it was dishes such as steak au poivre, lasagna, chicken piccata). Nimma makes a "shrimp scampi" drowned in salt, with a failed cauliflower flan as a side. (Is it possible to make a successful cauliflower flan?)

Meanwhile, taking an annoying page from "Big Brother," this season features a not-so-secret "couple": San Francisco-based Zoi and Jennifer. Perhaps we're supposed to think they are going to be nicer about passing the salt or whatnot, but seriously, can't see how this helps anyone. And it's not like they are going to get any "special time," given that the Chicago house is outfitted in all these bunk beds reminiscent of Tom Hanks's little-boy loft in "Big." Ack.

Also, what's with the casting director and the whole fauxhawk thing? It was Dale and Sandee last season; it's Richard and Jennifer this time out. Please, people, it's not remotely flattering. And it's just kinda . . . sad.

-- JENNIFER FREY

Editor's Note: Season three winner Hung Huynh and judge Gail Simmons were online to discuss the show.

Jennifer Frey  |  March 13, 2008; 9:15 AM ET Top Chef
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