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Riffs: Jonas, in the future

ralph stanleyWhat does the future hold for these young lads? (Photo by Michael Temchine/FWTP)

When I reviewed the Jonas Brothers show at Verizon Center last July, I wrote:

"The best hope of a continuing, thriving Jonas Empire would be to focus all energy on youngest brother Nick. From Michael Jackson to Justin Timberlake, there are plenty of examples of boy-band breakout stars. Nick is the group's primary songwriter, took turns on guitar, drums and piano and, for the middle school masses, is clearly the preferred member."

That's becoming a reality as Nick Jonas prepares to play a sold-out solo gig at the Warner Theatre, tonight. But will his breakaway be successful in the long run? We glimpsed into our Click Track crystal ball to see what the future may hold for the three JoBros.

(Glitch pop, reality shows and more speculation, after the jump.)

Nick Jonas

Best Case Scenario: Worldwide mega-star, selling out arenas and singlehandedly keeping the record industry afloat.

Worst Case Scenario: Struggles through a painkiller addiction and a regrettable detour into glitch-pop.

Most Likely Scenario:
Settles in as a slightly more popular and peppier version of Pete Yorn.

Kevin Jonas

Best Cast Scenario: He and his wife host a a variety show on Disney Channel 3D that consistently garners top ratings.

Worst Case Scenario: Jailed for embezzlement after failing to report donations to his recently founded megachurch.

Most Likely Scenario: He and his wife return to "Amazing Race: Celebrity Edition" to defend their title for the fifth straight season.

Joe Jonas

Best Case Scenario: Renowned designer with multiple high-fashion lines that have made him the toast of Paris and New York.

Worst Case Scenario: He starts going bald.

Most Likely Scenario: His hair looks amazing.

By David Malitz  |  January 6, 2010; 4:30 PM ET
Categories:  Riffs  | Tags: Jonas Brothers, Predictions  
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Next: Morning click: Courtney Love brings back Hole, Lil Wayne as Jesus, Katy Perry finds love

Comments

Heheh

Wait, which one is which?

There is a fourth option for all them, become a "Cheeta Girls"-esque joke, complete with uncomfortale evangelizing.

Posted by: EricS2 | January 7, 2010 9:46 AM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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