HaikuMan has disappeared, but no mind; he's inspired something special. I can virtually guarantee that if Internet clicks were based on the annual number of Freddy-Adu-has-been-traded sonnets, this would be the most popular blog in the world. Etan would be proud.
From ouij this AM, an untitled multi-sport sonnet:
A fickle, willful mistress Fortune is,
Our District to endow with worldly might--
For here the Congress sits, the White House is,
Yet still our Redskins are a sorry sight!
Some hope, at least, abides within us still,
When Gilbert with his culinary flair
Can shake and bake and then hibachi-grill
The opposition in the Wizards' lair;
Ovechkin, with his skill upon the ice
The envy of the hockey world will be
And Olaf Kolzig's saves are mighty nice--
That's two teams now, at least, with dignity!
But what's the Barra Brava going to do
When Fake Salt Lake makes off with our Adu?
From Bryan76, via e-mail, also untitled:
Unfulfilled promises led to your trade.
One championship and scads of hit posts --
And he could still be in eleventh grade.
Instead he came to DC full of boast.
It is a man's game and he struggled some,
The adjustment tough. A lot different
Than beating Koreans in one on ones.
A first round draft pick paying his mom rent.
He's [likely] off to Europe 'fore next year --
On the bench in MLS, but not there?
Some will blame Nowak that he is not here,
Au revior Freddy, on to Utah fair.
A several month stint in Wasatch cold,
Still, not bad for a seventeen year old.
Please hit the continue button for more.
From DCAustinite, continuing the theme:
The Redskins are a lousy team
Built out of champions
To watch them [play] will make one scream
and eat raw onions.
But they used to be so grand
and now their glory faded
Call them 'Skins, tribe or band -
Holy sh!t! Adu was traded?
From ouij yesterday
To a Young Squire
In seasons past, the Redskins would reverse
The end-around, and thereby win a game--
But now we Redskins fans can only curse
A team that once was proud, but now is lame.
Eliminated now, they can begin
To understand the wherefores of their plight--
In learning how one lost, one learns to win
By knowing what went wrong and what went right.
O Daniel Snyder in your lux'ry box,
Hear now these words of wisdom from a fan:
Free Agents are expensive building blocks;
For personnel, a team must have a plan!
Though you can purchase Burgundy with Gold,
Remember: vict'ry can't be bought or sold.
And then, apropos of nothing in particular, Reader Ben sent this extremely non-sonnetized take on the Terps:
Bambale Osby flexes,
Ekene leaps and soars,
Mike Jones hits from way downtown,
Greivis Vasquez roars.
Hayes threads the needle,
DJ steals a ball,
Gist swats a shot,
Bowers is REALLY tall.
The team has come together,
Defense leads the charge,
A lead that once had dwindled,
Now looms very large.
But then the shots start falling,
The lead is cut in twain,
"Defense leads to offense!"
Gary shouts in vain.
Before you know it--silence,
The crowd stares in disbelief,
Notre Dame's hit twelve straight shots,
The Terps' fans grind their teeth.
Sunday bloody Sunday,
The game is really done,
The Terps have really lost,
The Irish really won.
"But it's OK!" I think,
"You always need a first!"
"You're not gonna win 'em all!"
"And ND ain't the worst!"
"Next week is what matters!"
"When we open ACC play!"
"Don't worry we'll beat BC!"
"Even if it is away!"
But then a wise man next to me sadly points to the date,
"The game is on a Sunday, there's no escaping their fate."
Posted by: Bryan76 | December 12, 2006 1:19 PM | Report abuse
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