The Mystics Invoke the Envy of Your Yang
The Mystics are off to the second-worst start in WNBA history. 0-8. I don't get it. They started the year with the same basic lineup that went to the playoffs last year, right? The off-court chemistry seems just fine, to a casual observer. Most importantly, I needed them to help carry me through the summer.
To the left is Nakia Sanford, not being respected. (Thearon Henderson - AP)
But now, Mystics bloggers are resorting to Macbeth quotes. Their commenters are even worse:
* I believe a good college team could beat this team.
* It's obvious we need to CLEAN HOUSE from the top down and start over.
* Get a New GM and coach in NOW!
A college team? That's called disrespect. Luckily, I have just the thing for WNBA players who have been disrespected: The "Choose Respect Player Essays and Poems" on the WNBA Web site.
Noelle Quinn:
Respect is like when a new pair of Jordans come out...
You know everyone wants them, but are not necessarily willing to pay the price to get them.
Respect is like passing the basketball...
In order two receive it, you have to be willing to give it up.
Respect is hiring WNBA.com copy editors!!!!
Shay Murphy:
R= Ready at all times.
E= Effected by no one
S= Surrender to nothing
P= Passion
E= Efficient effort given always.
C= Calm and collective in every situation.
T= Tenacity
Um, respect is hiring WNBA.com copy editors!!!!
But enough jokes. Here's the Mystics' own Nakia Sanford, Etan Thomas with shorter stature and shorter hair, versifying about respect. Recite this during tonight's game, and all should be fine. With a few focused looks, they should be able to instill fear upon the sons they've birthed. Man, they need a win.
My strength is invisible to the naked eye
I am the legacy of nations
Under supple skin I protect the history of ages
My womb cradles the future of civilization
I am the ying that invokes the envy of my yang
My dominance makes me constant prey
I do not build up massive structures
Nor destroy the existing of my rivals to showcase my might
My power is innate
Passed down to me from sultry Cleopatra
Is the ability to quietly topple nations.
I can out wit any oppression with the same cunning
As Harriet Tubman, go underground and not be found by my hunter
The blood passed by Joan of Arc, allows me to lead against any challenge
Organize the ranks in my home, office or on a global scale
I do not need missile, gun , nor spear
One focused look instills fear upon the sons I birthed
Through my body passed the tribes that walked the earth.
I am loved, revered, and feared.
Respect me for the burdens I have carried
Respect me for the labor I have done behind the scenes
Respect me for my nurture and your birth
Respect me and learn to value a woman's worth.
By Dan Steinberg |
June 13, 2007; 11:38 AM ET
| Category:
Mystics
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Get This Widget >>
Posted by: | June 13, 2007 12:18 PM
DC has a WNBA team? The WNBA still exists?
Go back to the real teams that matter this summer ... DC United and the Nats.
Is there really nothing you can blog about in Baltimore this weekend? How about a long-distance call to La Paz with Moreno? And nothing on Olsen's hat trick? So much better things to be wasting time on than people who spell "to" "two" and "affect" "effect".
You're slipping man.
Posted by: | June 13, 2007 01:02 PM
"Is there really nothing you can blog about in Baltimore this weekend?"
LEAVE THIS PLACE AND NEVER COME BACK!
Posted by: Unsilent Majority | June 13, 2007 02:05 PM
"Two of their players--Alana and Monique--were the leaders of one of the best college teams in recent memory."
Well, they never won the big one, did they?
Posted by: TerpsFan | June 13, 2007 02:37 PM
Seriously, compared to Etan Thomas, Nakia Sanford is Maya freakin' Angelou.
(don't get me wrong, I always appreciate an athlete who's unafraid to speak his mind and step outside the jock stereotype; however, Thomas' "poetry" is indefensible)
Also my cousin, who plays HS women's ball and is a Chicago Sky fan, informs me that the Mystics got snookered pretty bad in the Monique Curry/Chastity Melvin deal.
Posted by: jr | June 13, 2007 03:00 PM
I can't believe you scooped Daily Sports Haiku on this, Dan. I need to pay more attention to WNBA.com.
Posted by: MDT | June 13, 2007 03:02 PM
Not to be a total d-bag, but Shay Murphy used the wrong "effect".
Her poem should be about RASPECT.
I'd like to blame the Cavs for boring me so completely that I noticed this.
Posted by: JFiz | June 13, 2007 03:03 PM
following the d-bag train - i'm guessing shay meant 'collected' and not 'collective'
R! E! S! P! S!
SAMMY JUMP IN FRONT OF A F-ING BUS
Posted by: frot hammer | June 13, 2007 03:35 PM
Wow that's some awful poetry.
Posted by: Lindemann | June 13, 2007 08:39 PM
The comments to this entry are closed.
"I believe a good college team could beat this team."
Two of their players--Alana and Monique--were the leaders of one of the best college teams in recent memory.