The Legend of Dave Hopla
The Wizards' new assistant coach, Dave Hopla, has to be the most intriguingly bizarre assistant coach in the NBA. This is a man whose Web site brags that he is considered by many to be the top shooter in the world, regularly knocks down 495 out of 500 shots, and once made 35,332 out of 35,979 shots during a lecture series. That's 99.02 percent. When I jump out of bed in the morning, I don't even hit the ground 99.02 percent of the time.
This is a man who wowed the Toronto media last winter by making 550, yes that's right 550, consecutive free throws after practice. I can't type "the" 550 times without mixing in a few "tehs," can't type "Brendan Haywood" 550 times without mixing in a few "Brenda Haywoods." Hopla's record is 1,234 free throws in a row. Not sure about his three-pointers record, but he's made at least 111 in a row, and once made 20 in a minute, which is apparently some sort of Guinness record.
Hopla grew up in Baltimore and played on the JV team at Dundalk, according to an old profile in the Providence Journal-Bulletin. His own playing career took him to an obscure school in Nebraska and then all over Europe and South America and, briefly, to the CBA. He's been doing full-time shooting clinics since 1987, and now has his own t-shirts, his own DVD's, his own Shooters Club (in which members can send videos of their faulty shooting form to the guru himself, who will return critiques, for just $199 a year), and his own speaking tour, having lectured the employees of Sears and KMart and Ehrlich Exterminators. What, pest killers need to be able to take a few shots, too. Ask Tom DeLay.
Anyhow, Hopla preaches an easy-to-remember system known as BEEF (Balance Elbow Eyes Follow), which is apparently more effective than my system, known as TOFU (Trick Others by Flinging it Underhand). Plus, he says vaguely Yoda-ish things.
"The rim is big," he once told the New York Times. "If you tried to sit on it, you'd fall right in." *
"Good is not good," he said during a recent motivational speech. "If you're doing good you can't be great. Good is the enemy of great....If I want to be great, I have to think different than the normal people, the good people."
As is mandatory in Hopla pieces, let me also mention that he's worked with Ray Allen, Kobe Bryant and Gilbert Arenas, although he and Gilbert have never practiced how to shoot free throws when others are whispering in your ear. What's odd is, in June, the Raptors announced that Hopla would be with them again this upcoming season, and then suddenly he was coming to D.C. Either way, he immediately becomes the most bloggable assistant coach in this city, with apologies to Mr. 700 Pages and future Champions Tour golfer Mark Simpson.
* Offer does not apply to James Lang.
By Dan Steinberg |
August 28, 2007; 10:39 AM ET
| Category:
Wizards
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Posted by: Bird | August 28, 2007 11:07 AM
Good incites Agent Steinz!!!
Tow reportialisal reuqests from Wiz Centeral in Wheaton Cirtyu City:
-what REALLY HAPPENED to Harvey Grant??? Russian mafia, we say!!! Get to bottom
-ask Rog & Cal about daring rescue by Mr. Pollin's helicopter during recent trip to Ireland to teach little scousers better pine-riding ettiquet.
Thanks you Doctor!!!!!
Love,
WizzNutzz.com
Posted by: Jarkko the Hamma Droppa | August 28, 2007 11:10 AM
Only after he eats 550 consecutive Big Macs...butup bump bah bum I'm lovin it
Posted by: Jordan | August 28, 2007 11:14 AM
1. If you don't hit the ground 99.02 percent of the time, does that mean you levitate .08 percent? Cause that would be more amazing than any ol' free throw streak.
2. I've found that flinging it underhanded doesn't really trick people but infuriates them, leading to blocked shots and hard fouls all around.
Posted by: ScottVanPeltStyle.com | August 28, 2007 11:42 AM
I've seen Dave lecture several times. It's amazing. He really does make 99% of his shots. He is shooting those 500 shots while lecturing.
Posted by: Bill | August 28, 2007 12:18 PM
scottvanpelt, ur math sucks
Posted by: T | August 28, 2007 01:09 PM
Coming to YouTube, February 2008 - Gilbert Arenas vs. DeShawn Stevenson vs. Dave Hopla - TRIPLE THREAT!
Posted by: Shawn | August 28, 2007 02:00 PM
Does the Mothering Hut carry any Dave Hopla t-shirts?
Posted by: onside kick | August 28, 2007 02:39 PM
Hopla taught me how to shoot. I've rebounded for him a couple times at camps. And I always paid attention and always made sure I did a good job. Regardless, he made fun of my hair a couple times.
In one of my old high school yearbooks, I can be seen in a random photo with a Hopla shooting clinic t-shirt on.
Posted by: Erik | August 28, 2007 02:44 PM
I went to a basketball camp at Boston College in high school and Hopla came for a speech/clinic. He really is unreal in person. Seeing someone make that many shots is very strange. He's very unimposing when you meet him, I think he under 6'. He is an absolute nut case though, rants and raves. I think my favorite part is that he wears a baseball hat with a cut-out of a hand on it to simulate shooting with a hand in your face.
Posted by: Ryan | August 28, 2007 03:19 PM
"scottvanpelt, ur math sucks
Posted by: T | August 28, 2007 01:09 PM"
LMAO. HILARIOUS!!!
Posted by: RichBoy | August 28, 2007 04:29 PM
Shawn beat me to it -- this has youtube written all over it. How could you miss this angle, Steinz, and will you be asking/prodding/taunting Gil until he agrees to a shooting contest?
If Hopla can teach Haywood and Thomas how to hit jumpshots, Abe should put a bronze Hopla statue outside of the arena a la the MJ statue in Chicago. Too bad Ruffin is gone -- turning Ruffin into the NBA's 3 point shooting champ would have been Hopla's masterpiece.
Posted by: Sean | August 28, 2007 04:49 PM
"35,332 out of 35,979 shots during a lecture series. That's 99.02"
Being nitpicky, but that's actually 98.2%, but the point is still made.
Posted by: Benbry Chu | August 28, 2007 04:53 PM
can't type "Brendan Haywood" 550 times without mixing in a few "Brenda Haywoods."
You have those reversed.
Posted by: Lindemann | August 28, 2007 10:18 PM
A year earlier here working with Michael Ruffin and they might have signed Ruff to a Max Deal. now he will play for marks in Russia. I here Pecherov is renting out his old place in Ukraine if he is interested.
Posted by: bring laron profit back | August 29, 2007 08:19 AM
Just had to add more 'LMAO' @
scottvanpelt, ur math sucks
Posted by: T | August 28, 2007 01:09 PM
Posted by: Rene Prosper | August 29, 2007 10:25 AM
The comments to this entry are closed.
yah but can he do it off the floor, off the score board, off the bankboard...nothing but net