Network News

X My Profile
View More Activity
On Twitter: dcsportsbog and PostSports  |  Facebook  |  E-mail alerts: Redskins and Sports  |  RSS

Breaking News: New Eastern Motors Star


This is pure good news.

Ready for this? After a three-year pursuit, Eastern Motors has finally landed....

CHRIS COOLEY

....as its new pitchman. As if life weren't always good enough.

"My guys kept telling him of our interest," Easterns CEO Robert Bassam told me. "He procrastinated for a little while and finally came over to my side. Obviously we want the best players on the Redskins, and we've been focusing on offense. He's going to the Pro Bowl; I think he is, by far, one of the best players we have. It only made sense to add him to our team."

Cooley will be in the Easterns commercials starting next year; in the meantime, all he has to do is drive his car, which is a Mercedes. And Cooley had apparently never been inside a Mercedes before.

"That's exactly what he said," Bassam told me. "He said, 'I've never ever been in a Mercedes before, I don't care what model you give me.' Of course, we gave him the best model there is," which would be a white 2008 CL 550.

How will Cooley dance? Will there be a heavy-metal remix of the theme song? What will be the name on the back of Cooley's Easterns jersey? Stay tuned.

By Dan Steinberg  |  December 13, 2007; 3:17 PM ET
Categories:  Redskins  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Paul Lo Duca's in the Report
Next: Maryland's Loss to Ohio

Comments

\m/ RAWK \m/

Posted by: bobzmuda | December 13, 2007 3:36 PM | Report abuse

They should have Dethklok cover the song, so Cooley can get his metal on. (devil horns)

Posted by: bryan2369 | December 13, 2007 3:51 PM | Report abuse

Huge, huge, huge breaking news!!!!

By far, the biggest sports story of the day.

Mitchell Report? We all knew what was coming out of that the day they announced it was beginning. (Although it looks like Nook was a little, shall we say, nuked?)

Posted by: DC Centurion's Shield | December 13, 2007 4:01 PM | Report abuse

That's an affirmative action hire if I ever saw one.

Posted by: Nationalcoholic | December 13, 2007 4:04 PM | Report abuse

Eastern Motors is a predatory car dealer that sells people cars with an outrageous interest rate. Their commercials are so stereotypical and targeted. They might as well move their dealerships into the ghetto next to a liquor store (that sells lottery tickets of course) and a Popeye's Chicken.

Although, with Cooley, maybe they are now going to target the poor white trash audience. Maybe they should have him in hunting camouflage in a Chevy truck while playing a banjo remix of their stupid jingle in the back round.

Posted by: Anonymous | December 13, 2007 4:06 PM | Report abuse

Is there an official statement from Chief Zee available?

Posted by: ScottVanPeltStyle.com | December 13, 2007 4:24 PM | Report abuse

actually the SLR McLaren is the best Mercedes.

Posted by: lamerz | December 13, 2007 4:45 PM | Report abuse

I cant wait for this commercial.

Posted by: Icantfeelmyface | December 13, 2007 5:15 PM | Report abuse

Dude, what are you talking about? Predatory? Poppycock!

At Eastern Motors, your job's your credit!

Posted by: SuzyIWantToKissYou | December 13, 2007 5:21 PM | Report abuse

Ford, Honda, Chevy, Beamer, and minivans
Over 600 cars, trucks, SUVs - are you listening, man?

Indeed! Are you listening, man?

It's pretty obvious when a business advertises that "your job's your credit" that they are going to make it their business to job you over your lack of credit. Until Americans learn that there are sometimes things they want that they cannot actually have right now, there will be businesses that operate within the law to job you in such a fashion. Of those businesses, Eastern Motors has the best commercials and theme song. I am not ashamed of my appreciation of those cultural products.

RIP the Punisher.

Posted by: Lindemann | December 14, 2007 9:34 AM | Report abuse

Thats great news! They should name him "Cool Cooooolleeeyyy"

What do you think?

Posted by: Big Fan | December 14, 2007 10:33 AM | Report abuse

So, C-squared was sent to waivers by BMW of Sterling and has been picked up by Eastern Motors. From fancy Armani suits (alongside Brunell and Darrell Green to) those yellow t-shirts ... It's like buying a house here to buying a house in his birthtown of Powell, Wyoming.

Posted by: craig | December 14, 2007 10:52 AM | Report abuse

A predatory car dealership??? You sir are an idiot. Easterns offers individuals who get kicked out of 99% of the dealerships in the city an opportunity to purchase a quality car and rebuild their already damaged credit history. They provide a service to the people in this city that most dealers do not care about. they should be praised, not ridiculed. Also, how many dealers give away 8-10 cars a year to the less fortunate. Learn your facts before you make those ignorant comments. Go Easterns!!!!

Posted by: chris | December 14, 2007 10:55 AM | Report abuse

A predatory car dealership??? You sir are an idiot. Easterns offers individuals who get kicked out of 99% of the dealerships in the city an opportunity to purchase a quality car and rebuild their already damaged credit history. They provide a service to the people in this city that most dealers do not care about. they should be praised, not ridiculed. Also, how many dealers give away 8-10 cars a year to the less fortunate. Learn your facts before you make those ignorant comments. Go Easterns!!!!

======

I have no beef with Easterns, but you're silly if you actually believe this

Posted by: Duffman | December 14, 2007 11:28 AM | Report abuse

Could the gentleman who emailed the predatory car dealership comment be a bit more racist. I guess in your eyes only perfect credit, upper class white people should be entitled to purchase a new car. Are you related to Hitler, or is he just your idol?????

Posted by: Anonymous | December 14, 2007 11:44 AM | Report abuse

Duffman, I happen to know this for a fact. Anytime you want an education on the business, I would be happy to school you, but until then refrain from ignorant emails, that are incorrect, racist and derogatory about something you know nothing about. Easterns has done more for the local communities this year than you and your whole family could do in 10 lifetimes!!!!

Posted by: chris | December 14, 2007 11:48 AM | Report abuse

Godwin's law in 15 posts. Nice going all!

Posted by: bobzmuda | December 14, 2007 2:11 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
RSS Feed
Subscribe to The Post

© 2010 The Washington Post Company