The World's Most Ridiculous Hoops Game
(By John McDonnell - TWP)
Summer in D.C. Sports. So boring. Nothing happening. Wizards gone. Redskins mostly gone. Russian superstars gone. Ukrainian soundbite machines gone. Soccer team struggling. Baseball team struggling. Tiger's months away. Nothing to blog about.
What we need a real crazy burst of nonsense to look forward to. Something that would bring together, at a minimum, the most bloggable athletes from the Wizards and Skins. Say, Clinton Portis, Santana Moss and Fred Smoot, to start. Then maybe throw in, hmmm, Caron Butler and DeShawn Stevenson.
As long as we're dreaming here, let's extend invites to two of the most insane athletes in America, just to up the chances of random acts of mohawk-cutting, bicep-flexing and porn-filming. Say, Terrell Owens and Chad Johnson. And maybe some old-school sound-bite insanity. Gary Payton, for example. And then some random headline rousers, like Willis McGahee and Jerry Porter and Kenyon Martin, for the heck of it. And to cap it all off, why not invite Braylon Edwards, the Official Athlete Spokesperson Concerning Sports Blogs?
Location? UDC, I guess; close to my house, easy access to Schlotzsky's and totally random.
So in this dream, we're talking about an early June charity basketball game at UDC featuring Clinton Portis, Fred Smoot, Caron Butler, DeShawn Stevenson, Chad Johnson, Terrell Owens, Gary Payton, Braylon Edwards, and all the rest, with the promise of celebrity halftime entertainment even better than the game itself. Yeah, that'd probably be good for a few days of blog copy. If only, right?
Wait, what's that?
By Dan Steinberg |
May 15, 2008; 3:39 PM ET
| Category:
Redskins
,
Wizards
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Posted by: Lindemann | May 15, 2008 4:17 PM
i'll be in town that weekend. $8.25 round trip ticket from NYC. say, word? WORD!
um, where's the after-party? i know it will be HUH-LAIR-EE-US!
~
Posted by: honey | May 15, 2008 6:01 PM
I am stunned that Big Tigger is still relevant.
Posted by: StetSports.com | May 16, 2008 9:49 AM
There's still Schlotzky's around here? I could use a hot pastrami and swiss on that black bread they have.
Sorry, what were you talking about?
Posted by: fishy | May 16, 2008 9:55 AM
Simply too good to be true.
Steinberg, can you dream us up a few championships? That would be good for a few days of blog copy. Right?
Posted by: The AMT | May 16, 2008 12:40 PM
Maybe T.O. will bring his new BFF, Flavor Flav.
Maybe Brigitte will show up, dry hump Flav at midcourt while rampagingly drunk, and then beat up T.O. prior to departing in her limop with Big Tigger to hit the Schlotzky's.
Goodness knows I'm not asking for much.
Posted by: Arlington Pimp | May 16, 2008 1:22 PM
Arlington Pimp very scandalous considering Brigitte is sober now and married to someone other than Flav.
Posted by: Dadryan | May 16, 2008 2:35 PM
If Cam'ron is the halftime entertainment, I'm wearing my finest kevlar.
Posted by: JGP | May 16, 2008 2:36 PM
Pseudo/Pre-planned scandalism is their whole schtick. Not to mention the fact that "going to rehab" is now a Hollywood PR move (no offense to true abusers trying to get right--I'm 4,640 consecutive days sober, myself). Besides, how many recently supposedly rehabbed celebs have fallen by the wayside (Scott Weiland, Amy Winehouse, Lindsey Lohan, and Kirsten Dunst, just to name a few)? If Ms. Nielsen is truly sober and happy, then I wish her nothing but the best. However, will I be surprised to hear of her fall from grace? Nope.
Substance abuse shouldn't be used to keep one's name in the press.
Posted by: Arlington Pimp | May 16, 2008 4:56 PM
I'm going so I can heckle Caron and DeShawn about their shot selection.
Posted by: Anonymous | May 16, 2008 5:04 PM
let's see now.....
your blog written at 3:15pm today, and this blog written at 8:39 am the same day -
HAS THE EXACT SAME PEOPLE MENTIONED. and who said the big dawgs don't read
DCURBANSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM
Posted by: james | May 19, 2008 6:35 PM
The comments to this entry are closed.
See, this is what I mean about blog items that are not "open for comment." There's nothing much more to express, in comments, about this than one's dumb-struck awe.
(ahem)
WWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW.