Best of Greg Blache
The bad thing about the Greg Blache's previous self-imposed media blackout was that he had been pretty much guaranteed to provide at least one memorable quote per media availability. The good thing about his promotion to defensive coordinator and subsequent return to on-the-record speech is that the quotes are back. The better thing is that some beat writers seem uninterested in incredible quotes. One of his best offerings yesterday, for example, was completely neutered in our paper. Here's the full quote, taken from Kelli Johnson's Comcast SportsyNet report, concerning yesterday's absence of LaRon Landry and Shawn Springs from practice:
You guys can worry about who's not here. I've got to worry about the guys that are here. It's like, you guys probably sit around worrying about your girlfriends that left you instead of worrying about the people that love you, you know? Take care of the people who love you, don't worry about the ones who left you. I've got to worry about the players who are here.
It's like, why worry about being spurned by a dead sexy Steve Spagnuolo when you can get maximum love from Jim Zorn? Other Blache-isms from the past decade or so:
On playing backups: "When you go hunting for dangerous game, you don't bring just one bullet."
On constructing the Bears' defensive line: "It's not like we're trying to make soup without a bone. At least we have a bone in the pot.''
On Brian Urlacher's rookie season: "We're trying to force-feed the kid an elephant. So you see him gag and what do you do? You give him the Heimlich maneuver. He's going to devour it and be a great football player. But he wouldn't be if we choked him to death."
On his uncertain coaching future with the Bears: "If we wanted to do something easy, we'd have gone into insurance or real estate or something like that....You don't come into coaching thinking it's going to be easy. There's going to be times like this, but that's part of the excitement, that's part of the thing that makes it what it is because there's so much jazz involved. Some guys hang glide, some guys downhill ski, some guys bungee jump. We coach."
On media criticizing him for handing out bullets to players: "It's like slapping up a guy who likes to fight. Don't pick a fight with a fighter."
On NFL hiring: "When people hire, it's a corporate marriage. They get to pick and marry who they want to marry."
On finding a good job: "All young guys would like to marry a supermodel. Half of 'em would drive you crazy and drive you to drink. As you get older, you learn to realize what you're supposed to like and what's best for you is not always equal."
On Chicago's defensive resurgence in 2000: "They broke my heart before. I'm not letting them break my heart again. They can buy me a drink, but I'm not falling in love.''
On whether the Bears defensive line would hold up in the regular season: ''I'm not a fortune teller. I don't have a psychic friend on the hotline."
On not applying for a job that was destined for Steve Mariucci: "If you are playing poker and you have three aces on the table, people kind of know not to bet against them."
On facing the Eagles: "We're probably not even a bump on the road for them. We're like a bug on windshield."
After an overtime win over the Lions: "Two bad teams playing, and they were just worse than we were. We're still a bad football team. A miracle on offense bailed us out. We played atrociously. We're an ugly defensive football team right now."
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