Archive: October 29, 2006 - November 4, 2006
Haggard: Yes To Meth, No To Gay Sex
Ted Haggard, the recently resigned president of the National Association of Evangelicals, admitted today that he bought methamphetamine and received a "massage" from a gay prostitute but denied having sex with him.
By Emil Steiner | November 4, 2006; 12:01 AM ET | Comments (70)
This Week In OFF/beat Crime
Tommy Vercetti they ain't. (Rockstar Games) Heading into Friday, we're looking back on another stellar week for OFF/beat crime. Here are the nominees thus far in our ever-popular Stupidest Criminal Award. First up is a careless German thief who didn't just leave his fingerprints at the scene of the crime, he actually left the end of his finger. Police in the central town of Hildesheim had little trouble matching the tip with prints from a 15-year-old Iraqi boy, who at first tried to deny breaking in, but later confessed when police showed him his digit. Does daddy really know best? Alfredo Martinez of Nevada was wise enough to realize he was too drunk to drive Monday night, but his designated driver choice left something to be desired. Reno police pulled over the 37-year-old's vehicle only to discover Martinez in the passenger seat, and his seven-year-old son behind the wheel....
By Emil Steiner | November 3, 2006; 2:03 PM ET | Comments (4)
Of Elections, Evangelicals, Gay Marriage & Sex
At New Life Church, Rev. Haggard may not have practiced what he preached. (AP Photo/David Zalubowski) Who said clergy sex scandals were only for the Catholic Church? On Thursday, Rev. Ted Haggard, President of the 30 million-strong National Association of Evangelicals, and vocal opponent of same-sex marriage, resigned amid allegations that he had a three-year fling with a male prostitute, (is that a sin?). Supposedly the Colorado pastor, and father of five, began the affair after responding to an internet ad under the alias "Art". The ad had been posted by a 49-year-old escort named Mike Jones who claims "Art" paid him to have sex once a month for the past three years. Jones also accused "Art", who has been named one of America's most influential Evangelicals, of snorting methamphetamine to heighten the sexual experience. I'm guessing that's not part of your typical Sacrament.These allegations come just days before...
By Emil Steiner | November 2, 2006; 9:47 PM ET | Comments (80)
Top 10 OFF/beat Gifts
He's making a list, and so am I... With Black Friday less than one month away, I've compiled a preliminary list of the 10 strangest products for this Holiday season. Please feel free to add your own or send samples to offbeat@washingtonpost.com. The best entries will appear on OFF/beat's Ultimate Wish List, released December 1st! 10) For equal opportunity fans of the Wonderbra, aussieBum proudly presents the Wonderjock -- perfect for the guy in your life who wants a boost of confidence without popping pills! 9) Got $1.764 million in your pocket? If so you and five friends can charter a ride on Sir Richard Branson's Virgin Galactic -- if it ever manages to blast off. 8) Know someone who's always wanted their own bar but never quite pulled it off? In 10 minutes you can make their dreams come true with Airquee's 40x19x22 foot inflatable British pub. The...
By Emil Steiner | November 2, 2006; 5:02 PM ET | Comments (2)
Breakfast Bender
Welcome to Thursday -- think of it as Friday Eve. Here are your headlines: Forget the rabid dogs, Pennsylvania postal worker Barb Dougherty says she was attacked and bitten by a crazed squirrel while delivering her mail on Monday.Too lazy to make your pilgrimage? No problem, because now you can just "rent a pilgrim." For the low, low price of $3,169, Pilgrim Gil will make the journey for you, and not even God'll know the difference (results may vary)! Topping a long list of bad Halloween costume choices this year is ex-con Oscar Aponte of White Plains, New York. The former prisoner's decision to take his daughter trick-or-treating while wearing his old orange jumpsuit resulted in Westchester County Jail being locked down after an off-duty guard saw him and reported a prison break. If you think trusting your investments to Richard Linklater-looking cartoons repping a company that goes by Chuck...
By Emil Steiner | November 2, 2006; 8:32 AM ET | Comments (7)
Israeli, Lebanese War Burns Pot Smokers
Mid East conflict is killing Israel's buzz. (Andy Clark -- Reuters) War, uh, what is it good for? Well, apparently not Middle Eastern pot smokers, who've now become the latest victims in the Israeli, Hezbollah conflict. According to reports, this past summer's war has forced an "eight-fold" spike in Israeli weed prices. The sky rocketing rates are believed to be a direct result of marijuana supply shortages forced by tightened security on Israel's northern boarder. Other cannabis transport routes such as the Sinai Desert corridor have been squeezed off by security patrols hunting for Palestinian gun runners. As a result, Israel now finds herself in something of a pot panic, with smokers shelling out dizzying sums of green to get their greens. In the words of one unnamed dealer, "They don't realize that all their wars are hurting the only thing that can bring a little quiet to the...
By Emil Steiner | November 1, 2006; 3:21 PM ET | Comments (15)
Fighting Underage Drinking With Phone Sex?
Who knew squealing could be so "exciting?" (AP Photo/The Oklahoman, Bill Waugh) In what could be the funniest political blunder since Dan Quayle's sixth grade "spelling lesson," Mayor Saundra Naifeh of Edmond, Oklahoma, and a team of volunteers recently handed out 22,000 fliers aimed at discouraging underage drinking with a "helpful" phone number at the bottom for ratting out drinking parties. It was all part of her town's contribution to Make A Difference Day, a national campaign "to help neighbors and the community," and what a difference they made. You see, the number that actually got printed on the fliers was for a phone sex line offering callers "exciting live talk" for 99 cents to $2.99 per minute. As exciting as reporting underage drinking can be, I don't think that was her intention. But, if the mayor wasn't trying to get squealers to have phone sex, who was? According...
By Emil Steiner | November 1, 2006; 8:22 AM ET | Comments (12)
Mayor Fights Underage Drinking With Phone Sex
In what could be the funniest political blunder since Dan Quayle spelled "potatoe" for a class of sixth graders, Edmond, Oklahoma mayor Saundra Naifeh and a team of volunteers recently handed out 22,000 fliers aimed at discouraging underage drinking. It was all part of her town's contribution to Make A Difference Day -- a national campaign "to help neighbors and the community" -- and the fliers even had a "helpful" phone number for concerned citizens interested in ratting out underage drinking parties. But it would seem no good deed goes unpunished because the actual number printed on the fliers was for a phone sex line promising callers "exciting live talk" if they called a second number costing 99 cents to $2.99 a minute. As exciting as reporting underage drinking can be, I don't think that was her intention. Nairfeh told reporters that identifying the nature of the wrong telephone number...
By Emil Steiner | October 31, 2006; 3:53 PM ET | Email a Comment
Lord of the Flies
These were not the pig heads in question. (Marc Kaufman - The Washington Post) Just in time for Halloween, a truck carrying two tons of pigs' heads spilled its cargo on a road in Germany. According to reports, it took firefighters an hour and a half with a forklift to get all the heads back in the truck (pleasant image). Why folks would need 4,000 pounds worth of pigs' heads is anyone's guess, and here's mine. Would it be outlandish to assume that they were used in some sort of macabre ritual to help the dead win elected office? After all, on Friday, Katherine Dunton won a seat on the Aleutian Region School District Board in Alaska by a coin toss. Ms. Dunton died of cancer on October 3rd, but won the run-off when her opponent chose -- are you ready for this -- heads. What, do I need...
By Emil Steiner | October 31, 2006; 11:25 AM ET | Comments (6)
Breakfast Bender
From modern day witch trials, to 3,300 pound rubber band balls, here's your Breakfast Bender of OFF/beat news.
By Emil Steiner | October 31, 2006; 9:00 AM ET | Comments (2)
Fertility Phones
In the future, opportunity won't knock, it'll ring. Not available on these handsets (By Jae C. Hong -- Associated Press) Mating calls have gone high-tech with Japanese phone maker NTT DoCoMo offering a mobile that can ring when women reach the most fertile part of their monthly cycles. The 9437.T handsets come with a button on the side that sets off a "camouflage melody," allowing users to appear as if they are receiving a regular message and not a call to the bedroom. This innovative technology comes on the heels of a recent study, which suggests that women tend to dress more fashionably during ovulation -- possibly a subconscious gesture to would-be mates that the iron is hot. (Go Science!)Now, supposedly these new telephones are intended to help couples conceive in Japan, where fertility rates are at an all time low, but given the value of such "inside" information,...
By Emil Steiner | October 30, 2006; 12:31 PM ET | Comments (6)
Breakfast Bender
Here's a recap of recent oddities from across the globe: Forzie, the four-legged chicken that hatched in New Zealand last month, died Friday. But according to reports, an extra anus -- not the extra legs -- was to blame. As farmer Marlene Dickey put it, "he developed two bottoms and I think he got glugged up." You mean flammable is the same thing as inflammable? (Sergei Grits -- AP) In an early bid for this week's "Stupidest Criminal Award," an unidentified Wisconsinite attempted to rob a fireworks shop Friday and ended up destroying the whole store when he fired his shotgun, igniting the merchandise. Crooks on the links. Two juvenile burglary suspects in Palm Harbor, Florida led police on a chase through Copperhead golf course, interrupting second round play at the PGA's Chrysler Championship Friday. If you were thinking of adopting a black cat this Halloween, you'd better stay out...
By Emil Steiner | October 30, 2006; 9:02 AM ET | Comments (3)
