Thursday Breakfast Bender
Welcome to December 14! Here's Your Top Six This Friday Eve:
6) Snakes In A Drain
Australian plumber finds seven-foot python lurking in a woman's toilet. The snake had grown so fat that Northern Territory's Parks and Wildlife Service workers had to go through the septic tank to pull it out.
5) Cheap Date
Dennis Miller once opined that a buck didn't go very far these days, but in Louisiana, four quarters can get you a date with the Governor. Monroe Chamber of Commerce offered up dinner with Kathleen Blanco at the Governor's Mansion as the high ticket item in a recent auction. It fetched a whopping $1.00.
4) Thanks Brother!
Speaking of a buck... Deceased 79-year-old, Theodore DiFiore wills $442,173.77 to the people of Los Angeles and one dollar to each of his five siblings. Maybe Kathleen Blanco's free for lunch?
3) Testing The Rubbers
Looking for a fun job this summer Down Under? Condom maker Durex is recruiting New Zealand's promiscuous population to test their prophylactics. According to company officials the Kiwi nation is one of the most sexually active and adventurous in the world. An interesting non-sequitur, sheep outnumber people in New Zealand by a 10-1 margin.
2) Think Your Office Parties Are Weird?
Turkish airport mechanics celebrate the final voyage of a repair-prone fleet by slaughtering a camel and burning its carcass on the tarmac of Istanbul's Ataturk International Airport. Not surprisingly, the supervisor who approved the sacrificial shindig has been fired.
1) When You Gotta Go...
Maryland school teacher is under review for allegedly telling three students to urinate in a bottle. Due to a strict escort policy at Salisbury Middle School and, persumably, a desire not to sully their britches, the eighth grade trio did as they were told and used the soda container to relieve themselves.
And for dessert, here is your Moment of Schadenfreude:
By Emil Steiner | December 14, 2006; 7:42 AM ET | Category: OFF/beat
Posted by: N.O. Joe | December 14, 2006 11:42 AM
I wouldn't have dinner with Blanco if SHE paid ME!
Posted by: N'awlins Padre | December 16, 2006 1:49 AM
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a buck for a date with Blanco, he got ripped off!