Heaven 2.0
Does St. Peter Take PayPal?
If you like to sin but can't stand the consequences, then a new online service may be your salvation. As I mentioned yesterday, Reserve A Spot in Heaven claims to be "the ONLY licensed and registered distributor of reservations in heaven." Thus far the site offers two packages: The "Essential Travel Kit" for $12.79, which includes "everything needed to transport one individual to Heaven," and an "All Access Travel Kit" for $24.95 that comes with an additional VIP pass that "will grant you access to 'VIP exclusive areas' including the Land of Milk and Honey, where all the elite get together and kick it."
Continuing in the same vein, the site says it is "directly affiliated and sent down by The Board of Heavenly Officials, the only governing body in Heaven, to offer you one thing and one thing only: a worry free, secure way into Heaven." All members will be recorded in the Book of Light™, which is apparently akin to being on the guest list at the coolest club -- if you're on, you're in.
The site's creators are Edgar Kim and Nathan Davis of Tacoma, Wash., who describe it as the culmination of hours of "random brainstorming." Reserve a Spot In Heaven launched last month and is not affiliated with any religious organization. "The dictionary defines heaven as just a plane of existence," Kim explained. "Not Buddhist heaven, not Jesus heaven, not Allah heaven."
And how is the response so far? Business is "slow," they say (the first two reservations went to Kim and Davis, who insist there is still plenty of room). "We're not trying to offend anyone," Davis says. "It's a novelty gift." Kim, says the site is just a "funny idea" that no one should take too seriously.
Still, they have gotten some hate mail. One letter they shared with me concludes: "I wish you the worst and hope you suffer, because that monetary pool of happiness that you swim in on mother earth will soon be fire and hot lava in the dungeons of hell!!! MAY CHRIST PURGE THE DEVIL WITHIN YOU! MAY THE DEVIL BE GONE!!!"
Thankfully, not every religious person feels that way. Father Phillip Biloom of the Holy Family Church in Seattle, for example, says he finds the site amusing. But he also said, "They're obviously trying to bilk people out of their money."
Kim, who unlike Davis was raised as an observant Christian says believes in both God and Heaven. When I asked him if he ever worried that God might not let him into heaven because of the site he said: "there are people selling a lot worse stuff" on the Web. Perhaps he was alluding to pair's next project: a website where customers can reserve a spot in hell.
By Emil Steiner | December 4, 2007; 7:30 PM ET | Category: OFF/beat
Posted by: | December 4, 2007 1:12 PM
This is so sweet! This would be a perfect secret santa gift , Lol.
Posted by: Stephen L. | December 4, 2007 4:11 PM
This is outright blasphomy and fraud. You can't sell people Heaven unless your God and He would not do that. The Better Business Bureau should shut them down.
Posted by: Get Real | December 4, 2007 4:44 PM
Boy howdy, some people sure take themselves SO seriously.
Lighten up, people. It's a joke, and no one could seriously believe that they will have actual reservations for heaven awaiting them at the Pearly Gates.
As for "fraud," it is all so tongue-in-cheek that Kim and Davis are not trying to deceive anyone.
As for "Get Real," two observations:
1)Ask your doctor of Xanex is right for you.
2)F### You if you can' take a joke. At all.
Posted by: Michael Szedon | December 4, 2007 11:17 PM
Perfect!!! hahaha
Posted by: Cattacomb | December 4, 2007 11:18 PM
One more thing about "Get Real..."
My e-mail adress is artatlarge@windstream.net
Go nuts. Nuttier, rather.
Posted by: Michael Szedon | December 4, 2007 11:19 PM
To Szedon, I think you need to grow up a little. What gives you the right to disrespect someones belief in God. You respond with nuts. Nittier? Are you in 5th grade or something
Posted by: Paul | December 5, 2007 2:06 AM
Just as real as the one the major denominations are SELLING
Posted by: Carl Sagan | December 5, 2007 9:10 AM
Paul, why should someone's religious beliefs get a free pass? Irrational beliefs are a constant source of pain and misery, but if we call them "religious" somehow they are to be respected.
Posted by: Nostradamus | December 5, 2007 11:39 AM
I think there is a big difference between religious faith and irrationally selling a fraudulent product that claims to be religious. People who can't see this are probably not going to make it to heaven anyway so best of luck.
Posted by: Oliver | December 5, 2007 12:18 PM
Something is only fraudulent if the seller knowingly lies to someone in order to get something from them. This website is an obvious tongue-in-cheek joke that no one is likely to believe is real, and the owners expect everyone to know that it is fake. Blasphemy on the other hand requires belief in what you are blaspeming. You call it blasphemy because you believe it is disrespectful to God in the manner in which you choose to believe in Him. It is not blasphemy if the person doesn't believe in it, though it may (or may not) be extremely disrespectful.
Posted by: Blind Sage | December 5, 2007 7:55 PM
Hey, Paul...actually I am a college graduate with a 4 year-degree and 2 1/2 years of University art school to boot. I'll bet that my degreed 6 1/2 years of college, with well over a 3.0 average for the whole time, beats anything you can truthfully claim. I gave my e-mail adress, you coward, so why try to libel me here? Why don't you have the nerve to mail me directly? Give me your adress and I'll happily shred you in any debate you care to initiate.
And, for the record, I didn't denigrate (look it up) anyone's belief in God...I was commenting on the narrow-minded, knee-jerk reaction of an individual.
You seem to be the one in need of maturation (look it up).
Feel free to e-mail me directly. Just as soon as you learn now to type.
Oh, yeah, I almost forgot...is an insult the best you can do? Got nothing else to say, so you just insult me? I pity people like you, but don't have much sympathy for them. E-mail me if you dare.
Posted by: Michael Szedon | December 5, 2007 11:43 PM
Hey, Paul...at least let me know if you'd like me to explain to you, simply, the difference between pity and sympathy.
Posted by: Michael Szedon | December 5, 2007 11:50 PM
I didn't know this website had anything to do with religion? No where on the site does it mention jesus or god, or any reference to them...
Posted by: me | December 6, 2007 1:09 PM
Haha
Posted by: Michael_Corones | December 6, 2007 6:28 PM
Who is anyone to say that this is against God? Does the Bible say in it, "Thou shalt not create a website selling reservations in heaven..."? I don't believe it does... And as far as that goes, I also do not believe that it pertains to any worshiping of false idols or idolities. Therefore, Ed and Nate, are fricken genius's for coming up with this. If you take offense to this website they have created, then you honestly do not understand you're own religion. As far as I know, God has a sense of humor too, or else we wouldn't. As far as fraud goes, people get paid millions of dollars a year for just their ideas, since you are knowingly not recieving a physical product, you cannot say that this is fraudulent. And who is anyone of us to say that theoligically they couldn't actually be selling spots in a heaven that actually exists? None of us "Know" the reality of heaven, therefore you are being a hypocrit by saying that what you believe is any better than what anyone else believes. Anyways... I think it rocks!
Posted by: Reality knocking | December 6, 2007 10:30 PM
Now this is very good. :-)
Posted by: R3N3G4D3 | December 7, 2007 2:45 AM
rofl l.o.s.e.r. there is no place up in heven you dont need to have a place in there the body goes to the ground and you wouldent take up no spot in heven l.o.s.e.r lol????,you cant give there money back when there dead your dumb!!!!!! this is a scamm!!!
Posted by: chris | January 8, 2008 8:29 PM
What a fabulous idea!
But it seems to me that they are too late....I think the Muslims and the jehovah's witnesses have been "selling" places in heaven for a long time now...
either with virgins as the prize or one of the 44,000 places that are reserved for the special jehovah's witnesses!
Posted by: St.Gabrielle | January 14, 2008 12:15 PM
The comments to this entry are closed.
i'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints... unless heaven's got a ghetto