1st!

We're lucky our DD loves her jogging stroller, we've logged several thousand miles with her in it. She particularly loves to race, post-race oranges & bananas were her first real foods. She's become a competant and efficient race volunteer/supporter. Running is our passion, including her in on it is natural & necessary. Sure, training for a 100 miler is out of reach for now, but we've managed to train for over 30 marathons & ultras in her first four years. She races the shorter ones with us--two hours seems to be her limit, though we've never tested it. It keeps our relationship on balance, gives us a great family outing, and drives our non-running family members nuts.

I'm training for my first marathon and even though I'm working and have a full family life, I'm making it a goal for this year. Exercising keeps me sane, and when I put it off or make excuses not to do it, boy, am I sorry.

The hardest thing I have learned to do as a mother is to make myself a priority. By that, I don't mean that I'm THE priority in my life, but I make sure I'm in the top 3. The old saying "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" is so true. Taking time to exercise and do things that make me feel good about myself only help me to be a better parent and wife. I used to stress about taking time for myself -- it seemed so selfish for some reason -- but I don't anymore.

Getting exercise in is so important. I think many moms, especially new ones, cut this out first because it seems so "selfish", but it's not. I used to exercise most days while I had a flexible job, but now my job is less flexible and my commute longer. I just can't seem to fit it in.

Anyway, good for you for working it in

Housework is good exersize too.

quote: Housework is good exersize too.

Indeed it is, but not in the same way that anyone who was REALLY active before having kids would find fulfilling.

Pre-kids, I played soccer probably four times a week. Post-kids, I've pared it down to once a week, on Monday nights after my kids are asleep.

It's not ideal, but it keeps our weekends free for child-centered activities and it keeps me in shape and in touch with a little bit of who I was before these two came along.

Saying that doing housework as exercise is overly simplistic.

I get to work at 6 am. Off work at 2 (no lunch) for household errands and housework. Get the kids off the bus at 4 and then it is homework, kids sports, dinner, baths, bedtime stories and at 9 o'clock me time. Somewhere before 6 am and after 9 pm, I need to add about 30 to 40 minutes of exercise. Any ideas? Right now I get up at 5. I guess I could get up at 4, but it takes about a hour to get ready, pack lunches and get to work.

Competitive tennis keeps me sane. I'm out with the ladies (though just as likely it is mixed doubles). The discussion can be about kids, but just as likely, it won't be about kids at all. Even when talk is about kids, it isn't "kiddy-talk." The competition is keen and lively. It is adults being adults.

Thank you for a great guest blog! I'm pretty active as well, and I worry about maintaining my level of activity when I become a mother. My boyfriend says the kids will keep me so busy that I will get exercise that way, but all I ever hear is how having kids makes you fat. I hate to be so shallow, but let's face it, being out of shape is not a good way for anyone to be happy. Like you pointed out, the endorphins from exercise can keep you going all day.

To Not Busy,

Some friends of mine walk around the soccer/football/baseball field while the kids are practicing their sports.

My other friend bought a recombinant (sp?) bike that she rides while watching TV for the hour before bedtime.

All I have is a husband and two dogs, and I still have a hard time finding time to exercise. It's my New Year's resolution to do so (that and quitting smoking--it's been 16 days!!). But I also get a full 8 hours of sleep, so that's probably why I don't seem to have the time for exercise.

Anyway, I'm very impressed and encouraged by moms who make time for exercise. It's SO important, and you set an example for lazy people like me.

In my doctor's office, there is a sign saying "If you don't make time to exercise now, you will have to make time for illness later".

Making time for exercise is an absolute priority for me. It's not easy, with work and kids, but it pays off. I feel happier, more relaxed and more energized after exercise. Sure, you are still sleep-deprived, but you feel more energetic if you exercise regularly.

Meesh: kick the smoking habit before you worry about exercise. Definitely exercise when you can, but place more importance on quitting smoking. Exercise is important, but you don't want to do too much too soon and suffer burnout. And smoking is more dangerous than sloth. Congrats on 16 smoke-free days! That's really great! I'm proud of you...good luck!

This is interesting. I'm currently seeing a therapist about anger management (related to parenting issues) and one of the FIRST things he asked was "Are you exercising regularly?" I need to work something into my routine - maybe an hour bicycle ride while my son is at morning preschool.

Not Busy, maybe you could make one of your errands after 2 pm "exercise". For me, it's not about finding the time, it's more about TAKING the time.

For Not Busy- wear a pedometer. If you really are busy, you are probably making the 10,000 steps per day that is recommended for good health. I was concerned about spending so much time on errands and house/yardkeeping to the exclusion of exercise until I discovered that the daily routine, combined with parking at the far side of the parking lot when I shopped, could help add steps to meet my goal of 5 miles/day. If the pedometer tells me I'm short at the end of the day, I can do a nice 1-mile circuit of the neighborhood after dinner in about 15 minutes. It's not the same as the Olympic sport I competed in when I was younger, but it adds up.

Mona,

having kids doesn't make you fat, eating the wrong foods does. Pregnancy will change your body, of course, and not necessarily to the better. Aging will do the same. If you stick to a reasonable diet and a reasonable amount of activity during pregnancy and parenthood, you will not get fat for the long term (short-term, your body will store some extra fat in preparation for breast-feeding but that will go away naturally).

Don't let them scare you - I find lots of women use pregnancy as an excuse for eating crap and letting themselves go!

Thanks, To Mona. Re: "Don't let them scare you - I find lots of women use pregnancy as an excuse for eating crap and letting themselves go!" I've heard the same thing! "I'm eating for two" is BS. You're eating for one, plus a fetus. You don't get to double your caloric intake. You're not carrying a 140-pound woman in there. I've read that a healthy-weight woman should gain only 30 pounds, tops, during pregnancy, and overweight women even less. Yet I still hear this excuse. I think the reason celebrity moms lose weight so "easily" after pregnancy is that they don't gain much to begin with and they keep their slimming habits throughout and immediately after pregnancy. I've also read that women should lose the weight within six months after birth; otherwise it gets much harder to lose. Is this true?

This blog is so timely. I've been trying to figure out a way to add in exercise to my life as well. One SAHM mom I know wakes up at 5am to work out at her community center. I'm just not a morning person.

I was thinking of trying some yoga after work (just a tape at home) in the winter. Summer/spring, with the longer days and light/warmth, I love being outside and exercise is usually not a problem. My very favorite exercise is biking or walking with our dog, but in the winter, I just don't have the motivation to do much beyond the bare necessity.

I have a bike seat for my son and he usually loves taking rides with me. I've also got a dog bike leash attached to my back wheel, so I take our dog for a mile run at the same time (he's been doing this since he was a year old and loves it).

As a side note, if people with high-energy dogs out there would get one of these bike leashes and run their dog regularly, the dog would be much happier and calmer (if their energy level is a problem). We have a pitbull/boxer mix who looks like the Target dog (he's not an alpha dog, is a sweetie and loves my son, please no pitbull comments!). This is a high-energy dog for our low-energy family, but one bike run a day (for 15 minutes or so) and he's a happy camper and just needs a bit of fun but nothing excessive. One caveat -- in the summer heat, you have to be careful to run them in the early am, before the pavement is boiling hot! Too much can really hurt their paw pads.

Mona - I agree having kids does not make you fat however, chasing them will NOT make you fit. It will make you exhausted but not fit. I do think that a lot of the weight gain stems from fatigue, lonliness and depression which can follow after having kids especially if you choose to SAH. It takes a long time to adjust to being a SAHM and it can be VERY, VERY isolating. Both my children were 5 wks early in the winter and I couldn't take them out in public, except for walks, until the RSV season was over. So both times I was locked in the house, in the winter for 4 months. I ate a lot during that time. When my dd was 18mos. old I felt comfortable leaving her at the daycare in the local gym and that's when I got my active lifestyle back. Its a different trip for everyone. I honestly don't know how WOHM's do it. When could they possibly sleep? Hats off to those who figure it out.

Housework is NOT good exercise. It is activity, but it is too stop and go. Do not kid yourself into thinking that housework will substitute for exercise.

Exercise has two aspects that are great for parents: 1) the buzz from sustained aerobic conditioning, and 2) the feeling that you've done something for yourself.

Exercise with your kid is OK, but it never worked for me. They hated the jog stroller, they hated the bike seat, they hated the nursery at the gym, they misbehaved at gymboree, they hate to hike, they want me to pull them around all the time at the pool. I had some luck working out while they were at swim lessons but they have to be big enough that you aren't expected to be in the pool with them. I needed to do it alone.

I found an 8:30 pm aerobics class at the YMCA. Dad was almost always home by then. I'd come home from work, feed everybody, have a light snack, then wait for his arrival. I'd leave, go exercise and feel great.

Once the kids got older the 6am routine worked. It's good for a kid to have an alarm clock and learn to heed it. Of all meals breakfast is one of the easiest to make ahead. You can leave the cereal out and the milk in a glass. I could be home before the bus came so if there was any real disaster nobody would be late to school.

Overall I credit the YMCA with saving my sanity, plus improving my health! Of the many things I spent money on the membership there is one of the best values I get.

I think I am going to try the pedometer. That was the first piece of useful information I have gotten from the comments on all the blogs I have been a part of. Thanks childfree and equal!

I don't know about the "lose the weight within 6 months" rule. The breastfeeding is a big factor. You are not going to lose the excess fat entirely until you stop breastfeeding (milk is very fatty). A lot depends on your individual situation/body and I don't think you can make a whole lot of sweeping generalizations. For example, I'm on the small side (110 pounds pre-first-pregnancy), a regular exerciser and healthy-food eater - still gained 35 pounds during pregnancy #1. Still didn't keep any excess weight for too long afterwards.

Don't stress, just be reasonable and you WILL keep looking attractive post-pregnancy. Things will start to deteriorate here and there - but they will do that eventually anyway, with age.

Exercise was great after I had my daughter. I dropped the baby weight within 6 weeks, but was still 2-3" from fitting into my jeans. And with all the major changes we had undergone at the same time (job change and move to new state), I lost myself for a bit -- everyone knew me as his wife or her mother, but no one knew me as just Laura. The gym gave me my body back, which helped me feel like I had some control, and gave me a place where people knew me as me, not just as a supporting character in someone else's life.

Unfortunately, I haven't been so successful with no. 2. Baby weight didn't just drop off this time, and I'm now back in an office, working closer to full-time and with double the kid stuff -- so need is greater, but finding time is harder. But the biggest problem is that the gym now feels like just another burden -- I need to take care of myself, I should lose weight for my health, I should get trim and fit so my husband still finds me attractive and I can keep up with my kids, etc. But my life is already filled with an overwhelming number of "need tos" and "shoulds." So when I get through a day of managing all those other needs (clients, kids, husband) and shoulds (groceries, cooking, house), the idea of working out feels like another weight on my shoulders -- it's just one more responsibility on that never-ending to do list. And what I really want by that time is to toss off ALL responsibility and spend a few minutes doing something that is just purely fun and nonproductive. So usually after the kids go to bed, I end up plopping down in front of the TV, or picking up a book or crossword puzzle, instead of heading up to the treadmill.

I am trying, though. I realize that all of my focus can't be on other people, and that even if the gym is a responsibility, it is a responsibility that I owe myself. So I do a weekend exercise class (when the gym offers babysitting) and a personal trainer once a week -- I hate the cost of a personal trainer, but I find that I need the motivation of having that appointment etched in stone for me to get there consistently (plus I'm cheap, so forcing myself to spend the money makes me see it as a real commitment). But I still haven't figured out how to fit in the additional 2-3 workouts I would need for real health and weightloss benefits. Oh well -- at least it's something.

Laura,

in my experience (and I have 2 kids & a job, too) exercising loses its "should"/chore-like character once you have gotten back into it. At first, yes, it's another thing on your to-do list, and you usually don't feel like it. After a while, you are back in the swing of it and start looking forward to the fun/benefit of it.

Maybe you could clench your teeth and try to just exercise regularly for a few weeks, even if it will add to your to-do stress, then see if it doesn't end up being a plus rather than another burden?

Yes, using a pedometer is an excellent motivator. You will probably find yourself making more time to get in those extra steps. In my old office, we turned it into a competition -- and the mom with two kids actually won both times (not because she spent all her time chasing after them, but because she made it a point to try to win the competition).

Another tip: if you have a playstation, there is a video game called "Yourself Fitness." My hubby bought it for me after my first baby was born, and I love it. You can tailor your workout a little bit, and you can work out in 15 minute increments, which I find really makes me feel better. I don't have a lot of time to spare either, but 15 minutes is probably what I spent reading this blog!

I found with child #2 that it took almost 18 months before I had enough energy to pursue a structured exercise plan. A second child is very tiring because #1 is there also.

Once #2 got to be about 18 months old he was easier to deal with and my husband was more willing to step in and take up slack which freed exercise time up.

If you work out 3-4 times a week (say twice during the week, once on a weekend with another stray activity thrown in) for about 3 weeks it will suddenly become a part of the things in your life, so it gets easier to do.

Ajax, my brain realizes you're right. I know when I'm in the routine, when I stop for a while, I notice that I feel a lot worse. Problem is fighting the apparently magnetic attraction between my butt and the couch after dinner. :-)

And also, frankly, trying to find a routine that works -- we have a treadmill on the 3rd floor, but I've hesitated to use it early AM or evening for fear of waking the baby (in violation Rule # 1 of parenting). And now that the baby is a toddler who could sleep through an earthquake, our kitchen remodel has created so much dust that it gives me asthma problems. My current plan (once I get the dust cleared out next month) is to hook up a VCR to the TV up there, and designate a particular show that I can only tape up there (like Dr. Phil -- something my husband hates). I figure if the only way I can watch my shows is to have my butt on the treadmill, that may give me a little more incentive.

"I think the reason celebrity moms lose weight so "easily" after pregnancy is that they don't gain much to begin with and they keep their slimming habits throughout and immediately after pregnancy."

Actually, if you notice- celebs often PILE on the punds because they deprive themselves of eating before pregnancy. They lose weight quickly after the birth due to personal trainers, chefs, unlimited money and babysitting, not having to work full time or parent full time, and dangerous detox diets that make them shed 60 pounds in a 2-3 month period.

I don't think we should be looking to these women as having a healthy lifestyle. Did you see Reese Witherspoon on the Golden Globes last night? She is scary skinny now. Let's not look up to those moms.

Reese is going through a divorce right now, which may very well be why she's lost weight. I actually think in terms of her charity work and her family life, she IS a role model, and I do look up to her.

Where are all the supporting dads in this?

My wife went to the gym for a while (she hates exercising) and I watched our son during that time after I got home from work. We are now trying to find another outlet for her to get some activity. I have told her I will be with the boy whenever she needs to get out.

Now, my exercise is a different matter. I really miss it, but physical problems prevent me from doing so.

great guest blog! I too rise early to fit in my workout. I get up at 5:15 am ( I have a long commute into work and have to drop off my kids at school at 7:15 am) to go for a run outside. My husband gets up even earlier 4:30 am to fit in his workout and be available to get the kids started on breakfast etc. It works for us and it gives me energy throughout the day.
On weekends, My family and I take long walks (2-3 miles) and try to get as much outside exercise as possible in a fun way. The kids are very used to going outside to play because their school sends them outside for recess three times a day in every season (only keeping them in on rainy and days where it is actually snowing hard).
I think exercise is one of the key things that help me keep my balance. I have recently also started taking yoga classes at night twice a week after the kids go to bed. It's a really nice complement to running in the morning.

"This parenting/sport balance works for my family because daycare is a block away and I work from home."

You also have someone else at home while you're at the gym (hubby? au pair?) willing to get the kids up and feed them the Cheerios or scrambled eggs while you're working out. That's great, and more power to you -- just don't overlook that (or forget to appreciate it) in your calculation. I used to work out in the early morning but I had to do it early enough (beginning at 5:30 am) that I was back in time to be a part of the kids' routine, and eventually that became impossible. When they are old enough to get themselves dressed, at least, I may try it again. In the meantime I fit in workouts at lunch, if at all.

Father of 4, it is difficult to read your comments and not conclude that you've never actually done any housework. If you think it is "exercise" you are just wrong.

Exersize not only lowers my blood pressure and glucose levels, it also does quite a number on my IQ. I've learned not to schedule anything that requires logic after working out during lunch.

I do, however, enjoy reading the Mommy blog during this time.

The only way to be successful with excercize is to realize that something has to go. That's really easy if you spend lost of time watching TV, but since most of us don't its more about pinching minutes.

Let the housework go. Real exercize is more important that housework. Yes, clean the clothes, the dishes, and the bathroom but stop putting away ever item in the house. There may be pile of books all over my house, but I'm pretty happy and healthy and so is my family.

On another note, unless your spouse's job requires him/her to be a workaholic they can put the kids to bed too. 40 minutes of pilates every other day while dad puts the kids to bed is a great start and is only a $30 investment for DVD and mat.

Totally off topic but very interesting story in today's NYT, "51% of Women are now living without Spouse."

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/01/16/us/16census.html?hp&ex=1169010000&en=47985bda8ea9f048&ei=5094&partner=homepage

Leslie, A good topic for a column?

speaking of balance - I think that there are inevitable choices to be made. If I wanted to make working out my #1 priority then I could likely look like I did before I had kids. That would mean however, that I would have no time to read, do my woodworking or any of the other things I enjoy. So I've kind of had to find a place that is deciding how much I'm willing to work out, how much extra weight I'm willing to carry and what I'm willing to give up to do the work out. Then, I've just got to be happy with it. The most important thing is being healthy and strong (which is what I tell my kids when they ask why I work out). I can be healthy and strong without being the woman I was when I was 25 physically. Frankly I may be heavier, but I think I'm fitter than I was when I was 25 because I eat better and work out more regularly.

Fred, I think it's a great issue. I raised the exercise issue last week with the request that it show up in this blog, and it did. It's a guest blog, and I don't know if my comment is the reason this guest blogger wrote, but hey, it's worth a shot. I'm looking forward to reading the blog about that article, and the comments that follow. :-)

51% of Women are now living without Spouse

I am interested to know the socioeconomic breakdown in this study. Certainly, the overwhelming majority of women I know are married. But I am white, college educated, and upper middle class. The women I work with who are not do seem to be raising children alone (either through divorce or more commonly because they never married) or have never been married.

There is some breakdown of the figures in the article, I am not going to recap. But as you suspect, white, college educated, and upper middle class tend to be with a spouse.

First - congrats to Meesh for quitting smoking. I did it last year. I agree with the poster above about not trying to do too much at once but I did find that exercising did help with not wanting to smoke as you feel so much better.
Second - there are alot of little things people can do to get their exercise (supposed to get thirty mins of good areobic per day) without a formal exercise time. The thirty minutes doesn't have to be all at once - 10 minute spurts three times a day is good too. Take the stairs. Park farthest away from the door. It all counts.

"there are inevitable choices to be made. If I wanted to make working out my #1 priority then I could likely look like I did before I had kids."

moxiemom, I'm with you. I love working out, but it's not more important to me than bedtime stories and the other time I spend with each of my kids between 7 and 10 during the week. Sure, their dad loves to be dad, but I'm not giving that time with my kids up. Hence, I have great weekend workouts, but until the kids are older, I may not be as fit. This time will be gone soon enough. Too soon, to be honest.

Laura/Mona, losing the baby weight was a non-issue for me each time. My post- and pre- weights were identical within 6 - 8 weeks. What changed is the distribution of those pounds and my age, and the weight challenge is a direct reflection of our decision to have our kids at a later age. My weight gain is not a reflection of eating unhealthy items. It's a reflection of the fact that I am now in my mid-40s, and coloring and reading stories with my 5 year old, and playing tennis (if you call it that) with my pre-teen are not aerobic activities. I spend my free time in less active ways -- for now. When my kids are older, I will joyfully be back at my gym 7 days a week. My husband is well aware of the trade-off and supports it. If he felt differently, we'd go back to the drawing board and evaluate our priorities together.

"Where are all the supporting dads in this?"

My husband is usually at gymnastics with our daughter when I take the boy to the gym on Sat. AM. I hope I didn't imply that any of my failure to hit the gym is his fault, i.e., I can't find time because that jerk isn't carrying his weight around the house so I have to do everything -- that's not it at all. It's more like we're both tired in the evenings, he already does a lot with work and kids and chores, so I don't want to dump more responsibility on him (at least not on a regular basis) given everything else he does. Plus I don't want to spend big chunks of evenings and weekends away from the kids myself, since I'm gone so much during the week -- I mean, kids go to bed at 7-7:30, so if I go work out after work, I might not see them at all that evening, which I just haven't been willing to do.

Before kids, I jogged a lot and ran short 5-10K road races. Also went to the gym. Then with Kid#1 began squeezing in a quickie workout on my lunch hour.

By the time I had three kids, finding time for exercise was a nightmare. I always told new moms that pregnancy doesn't make you fat -- it's the inability to exercise once you have the baby that does.

My solution was to put in a small exercise room in the basement. That way, when the kids are napping, watching tv, or asleep for the night, I can sneak downstairs to work out. Sometimes they come with me (oh, joy) and slide down the ab bench while I ride the bike. I needed a way to exercise without leaving the house, and this works great.

My favorite joke on this subject:

First baby, you can't wait to wear maternity clothes.

Second baby, you put off wearing maternity clothes for as long as possible.

Third baby, your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Two things: First, I'm beginning to believe that if you were an exerciser before you have kids, it is easier to be an exerciser afterwards. I was always an exerciser. I enjoy working out and competition. Not everyone does. However, given the weight distribution problem as described by NC lawyer, I'm glad I have that exercise predisposition.

I second that recommendation to work out while the kids are doing their atheletic activities. Just doing something worked for me when they were younger. Now that they're older with their more time intensive competitive sports, I like to think I don't look like I'm pushing 50, as much as pulling 30. he he he...

I was always relatively active before having kids, but after the birth of my second baby, exercise became the lowest priority of my life, and it didn't help that my second child had/has physical and developmental disabilities, causing additional emotional, financial, and physical strain for my husband and myself.

About a year and a half ago when my doctor told me to see a psychologist for depression and lose some weight (my weight at that point was the same that it was while seven months pregnant with my first child) I finally took exercise seriously--I made a "no excuses" committment to exercising at least three times a week, preferably five or six. And I was amazed that I could actually find the time when I had always said I had no time for exercise. I started taking one hour lunches twice a week at work (I never took lunch breaks before) to either walk outside or run on a treadmill at the gym. I ran once or twice on weekends too. After getting the kids to bed (DH and I work opposite shifts so except on weekends I can't have him stay with the kids while I exercise outside), I'd put in a pilates or aerobics DVD and would do that for 20 or 30 or 40 minutes. At one point I challenged myself to exercise every single day for a month, just to see if I could--and I did. Some days that just meant ten minutes of jumping rope in the kitchen before packing lunches for the next day and doing the dishes, or jumping on the trampoline with the kids for 20 solid minutes (they thought we were playing), but I always got some kind of hard exercise each day.

I figure now that if I can manage to find the time to exercise in with all of my other committments, anyone can. It might mean going to bed a bit later, or skipping some housework, or getting creative with time management, but it's really worth it. Interestingly, about eight weeks after that doctor's appointment and eight weeks of exercise, the psychologist I had made an appointment with called to cancel the scheduled first appointment and I never called to reschedule--the exercise alone had cured the depression. I don't think it was just the physical activity that did it (althought that was a lot of it) but also because I was finally doing something for myself regularly and taking control of this one aspect of my life. I'm not saying this would work for everyone--I was lucky--but I'm glad I started the exercise when I did.

I really hate exercising, btw; never lucky enough to feel the "runner's high" or anything like that. It's pure work and drudgery for me every time, but the benefits are so worth it.

Sarah,
I'm impressed. You are a strong woman!

Hi all,

Sorry to hijack your board, but I just found out that it will soon be MY board. (That is, just found out I'm pregnant.) And I have two questions:

First, someone here mentioned that she made good friends on an internet forum of expecting mothers. The ones I've seen (iVillage and its ilk) seem to be full of 12-year-olds, with their "siggies" and emoticons and rainbows and unicorns and bad grammar. Are there any boards for grown-up pregnant women?

Second, I'd love to hear some thoughts on doctors and hospitals versus midwives and birth centers.

Back to your regularly scheduled programming...

anybody else get the denise austen workout advertisement on the right side of this blog today? Good ad placement.

For all of you runners out there:

http://www.seemommyrun.com/

I notice lots dads and kids in strollers on the sidelines of local road races these days with signs cheering on mommy. It gives me hope.

Working out has been a challenge for me since having my 1 year old. I lost the pregnancy weight within 4 months, but I don't workout as regularly as pre-baby.

I used to workout 3 to 4 times a week regularly (half aerobics or running, half pilates). Now it's more like 2 to 3 times a week and for a little bit shorter of a period.

The trouble I am having is that I already get up at 6 am, commute 45 minutes with my daughter, work a 9 hour day, commute 45 minutes home, and don't get home until 6:30 or so at night. By the time my daughter's in bed by 7:30 or 8, I am usually exhausted. And I go to bed by 10, since I NEED 8 hours of sleep. After my daughter's in bed, I am usually too tired to work out, and I also want to spend the time with my husband.

I've been working out when she naps on Fridays (which I take off -- that's why I work 9 hour days) and then at least one of the days on the weekend, when my husband can watch her. Then I try to sneak in a pilates routine or something I can do while watching the idiot box one night a week. My husband gets up at 5 am to work out -- but I am just not cut out for that time of day!

It will get better in spring, I think, when I can pull out the jogging stroller again!

Any activity that causes me to break a sweat I consider exercise. this includes scrubbing floors, bathtubs, carrying loads of laundry up and down steps, moving couches and furnature to get to hidden or lost artifacts, mowing the lawn, washing the car, raking leaves, gardening. It's all good.

It's my story and I'm sticking to it.

The best exersize: sex! Amazingly fulfilling. Studies have shown the more you have, the happier you are and the longer you live.

One other thing that really worked for us as a family is family bike rides. We are lucky to be near a great trail so we will spend "nice" Sunday am at "family church" and go on a 3 hour bike ride. We got a tag along for the 6 year old which is the one wheeled bike that fits on the back of the grown up bike so he can peddal or not and then we have a trailer for the 4 year old where she sits with snacks and drinks for the family along with a couple of books. It was a pretty significant finanacial investment but it allows us to have time as a family, be fit and help to encourage and promote a healthy lifestyle for our kids.

Totally Off Topic --

Congratulations!

I have no thoughts on boards -- ran into same problems you did.

On birth options: the only real advice I can give you is to really think through how you would like things to go, but then also expect things not to go according to plan. I did a very detailed birth plan, and pretty much that whole thing got shot out of the water (sure, you can ask for a birthing ball -- but when you go from 1 to 8 cm in 45 minutes, it might not get there in time!). Fact is, your baby will decide how, when, and where he or she comes out, so don't get deluded into thinking you're actually in control of anything. :-)

I would also put in a plug to seriously consider a hospital for your first baby. I understand that some folks will strenuously disagree with me on this, and that for the vast majority of childbirths, hospitals are completely unnecessary. But the problem is, with the first one you just don't know how your body and the baby are going to react until you're actually there. In my case, both my babies had a real problem getting through the pelvis (all my docs had told me there was plenty of room, no problems, but apparently, freakishly large heads run in the family). If I had not been in a hospital with my first baby, there is a reasonable chance we both would have died (her first apgar was a 2).

I really really really am not trying to be a scaremonger -- my case was very unusual. For me, I chose a hospital for the first, with the idea that once I knew how things went, I would be in a better position to think about a birthing center for no. 2 (not surprisingly, we ended up choosing a hospital for that one as well). And there are things I REALLY did not like about the hospital experience (like not letting me walk around because I was being induced). But if you are interested in a birthing center, I would suggest finding one that is located right next to a hospital, so if you're that one in a hundred or one in a thousand that runs into a problem, you're right where you need to be to get it addressed quickly.

I just realized how much my message sounds like I am apologizing for not working out more. Yet, I should take pride in the fact that I do manage to workout pretty regularly and that I am a pretty healthy person. I am within the normal weight range (though like most people I would love to lose 10 pounds), my physical health is great, and I do what I can to make myself healthier without being obsessive about it.

Why is it that we feel so much pressure to work out as if we were training for some major sporting event? This board was supposed to be about exercise as a means of relaxing -- and yet for many it's far from relaxing.

I am 100% convinced that some people experience the psychological benefits of exercise far more than others. I work out regularly and enjoy it while I am doing it, but my husband gets a high from an aerobic workout that far exceeds what I ever feel. Even when I workout my hardest. So do what you need to do to stay healthy -- and if you enjoy it, do more. But give yourself credit for what you DO get done in a day! It's not easy!

I must admit that I am one of those who gets extreme highs from working out - helps me avoid the blues like nothing else. I do need to find a way to balance it out though... currently I am obsessing about finding enough time to train for races this year and I'm not sure it is going to happen and I need to be okay with that.
I tend to do yoga during my lunch three to four times a week, and swimming, running, and biking when I can squeeze it in - even if that means that I get up at five or go as late as ten... I can't wait until it gets lighter out later - I hate running in the dark...

I totally agree with DC Mom. It's important to work exercise into your schedule, but we don't have to take it to the extreme. I do my best to get out there running four times a week -- with a kid in the stroller on the weekends -- but I'm not training for a marathon, and I need to get the extra hour of sleep on the days I don't get up and run. When baby #2 showed up, I did not run out and get a double stroller -- that was more than I was ready to take on.

I really should find a way to start incorporating exercise into my day, for the weight/health/energy/mood benefits. But like others I don't want another isolated activity that takes me away from my family, and for me, time after the kids fall asleep or before they wake up doesn't really exist (go to bed at 9, snuggle and read with parents til 10, start the wake-ups at 6:30 - if I do rouse myself after they're asleep it's for shower, work deadlines or house/laundry triage . . . )

Last year we got our kids (now 6 and 9) the Dance Dance revolution game for their GameCube (with mats you dance on at the indicated places/pace to score points; comes on other game platforms too I think). It is fun and quite aerobic exercise; it also made my youngest finally 'get' rhythm and beat in a way that none of her previous kiddy-music classes had (I think it was the visual reinforcement of the heard beat, and the reward for stepping exactly on the beat). At my oldest's slumber party last year the girls all loved it; it was very funny to see them all lined up dancing exactly the same steps at once . . .

Anyway, I keep meaning to leave the mats hooked up in the playroom and to take advantage of that to use it for exercise. Even if the kids join in/take turns (we can run 2 mats at once) it's very aerobic. The kids were very keen on it, using it daily for long periods, last year, though lately their obsession of the moment is webkinz. So at least if I can do this they're likely to join in/keep me company, and if not I'm still in the center of things with them . . . only thing is that it's aerobic enough to prefer scheduling it before a shower . . .

Congrats on quitting smoking! My mom did it after chain-smoking for 40 years. That was 6 years ago and she hasn't smoked since. She used Nicorette for 1 year and then quit altogether. She said so many people said it was impossible that she believed them. But once she did it, it wasn't as hard as she thought it would be. You go!

I get up at 5:15 AM. Shower, dress, nurse the baby, have breakfast while pumping and putting on makeup. Out the door at 6:25 to be at work at 7.
Work 10 straight hours (no lunch hour) so I can leave at 5 PM. Home at 5:45ish - take baby from DH who is a WAHD - and who immediately heads upstairs to get in some work time. Nurse baby. Make dinner. Eat dinner. Nurse baby. Clean up from dinner and get stuff ready for tomorrow morning. Bedtime routine for baby starts at 7 PM. Baby in bed around 8 PM. I go to bed around 9 PM (because baby still gets up at least once a night and I NEED 8 hours - ok really, I need 9, but I've given that up)... and don't really think I should be exercising less than an hour before bedtime.

Granted, I'm working 4 days a week... but when exactly am I supposed to be exercising on those days? I don't get enough sleep as it is (since that 9 PM bedtime easily gets pushed back when anything needs to be done).

I normally don't comment on the blog writers being out-of-touch with regular people... but this one hit a nerve.

We DO try to go out and walk on the weekends, but with the cold weather finally coming in, that's not going to last.

To exercise more, I would have to give up more sleep - and that's just not possible.

we also got a bike extension aka kiddie crank & do family bike rides. son has a goal - he wants to bike out to my brother's house to visit with his cousins. that would be a 30 mile ride out & back. we are slowly working up the milege with that goal in mind. son hikes with us but the miles we can hike are limited by his limitations.

weight loss after baby. i gained 60 pounds when i got pregnant & lost almost all of it within 6 months of my son's birth. i had been a big hiker before his birth and after he was born we could put him in the back carrier and were still able to hike. all the came to a grinding halt when son started walking. he no longer was content to sit in the carrier but wanted to practice his new found skill. the miles i walked on the weekends dropped from miles to around the block. i continued to eat like i was still hiking & gained 30 pounds before i realized what had happened. that weight is slow to come off. i am thinking it is my pentence for being such a superior snob to oeveweight people.

Anyone see the Globes last night? Could most of the women be any skinnier - it was like the night of the thousand clavicles! Honestly - apalling. Loved Borat.

we also got a bike extension aka kiddie crank & do family bike rides. son has a goal - he wants to bike out to my brother's house to visit with his cousins. that would be a 30 mile ride out & back. we are slowly working up the milege with that goal in mind. son hikes with us but the miles we can hike are limited by his limitations.

weight loss after baby. i gained 60 pounds when i got pregnant & lost almost all of it within 6 months of my son's birth. i had been a big hiker before his birth and after he was born we could put him in the back carrier and were still able to hike. all the came to a grinding halt when son started walking. he no longer was content to sit in the carrier but wanted to practice his new found skill. the miles i walked on the weekends dropped from miles to around the block. i continued to eat like i was still hiking & gained 30 pounds before i realized what had happened. that weight is slow to come off. i am thinking it is my pentence for being such a superior snob to overweight people.

To respond to "Not Busy" (I love that postname!!), the only suggestion I have --which I just started doing -- is to get a set of very light weights (2 or 3 lbs.) and when you walk from one room to another while doing things when your kids aren't around, pick up a pair of weights and do some bicep crunches, arm lifts, etc., while you walk even those few feet. Sounds silly, but in just a few days, my arms feel firmer and I feel like I'm doing something that takes no extra time but the initial purchasing and positioning of the little weights around the house. Do same thing at work. Good luck!

Mary2again, You're right all the way -- the folks who say "you have time" often have the time, but shouldn't assume everyone else does. If I exercise during lunch, I have to stay at work later. That's not balance. My commute doesn't allow for exercising in the a.m. before work. The blog writer and her husband, and evidently a few others, are living in a different world from me.

Economics and gender are at play here, as well. We can't afford exercise equipment -- no treadmill in our house -- our gym memberships. Yes, we can walk outdoors, but that opportunity is limited by weather and time of year. I don't feel safe walking after 10 p.m. in the dark by myself. In the summer, this limitation becomes unimportant.

I'm not justifying not exercising, but have a sense that one or two responders believe that any parent not engaged in regular exercise is either lazy or a poor time manager.

To Mary2again. You are right. Sometimes, it's just not possible to exercise, or the cost of it (less sleep, for example) simply outweighs the benefits. I would say give it some time. Once you stop nursing, that will free up some time (no more pumping, for one thing). Once the baby sleeps through the night more predictably, you will have more energy and time. Etc.

Totally Off Topic

hospital, hospital, hospital!

you never know what's going to happen, have an emergency medical team ready in case a ceasarian or other measures are needed to save your baby's life. Pick your doctor based on his/her birth philosophy. Many hospitals try to give you a natural birth experience if you want one, the nurses are into it and the doctors support it.

Where are you located?

I started exercising after baby #2. She is heavy, my back was going out, I was unemployed and had time to hit the gym. The Y has babysitting. Turns out I enjoy weightlifting to a certain extent. No "high", but the class I take is fun. And I really like the results, both in my weight/size and seeing my progression of weights. I don't do enough cardio, but we all have to start somewhere.

Now that I'm working again, it's hard to fit in. I went part-time at least somewhat so I could fit in the exercise - my husband works crazy hours, so I can't count on him to be home and watching our girls.

The most important for me is to cut myself a break. No beating myself up if I miss a class, just congratulating myself when I do make it to the gym.

And now that my older is in swim lessons at the Y, I put the younger in babysitting and work out for 1/2 hour. Again, better than not working out, so no guilt about not getting in a full hour.

Along the same lines as what flexbutcrazedworkingmom wrote, I bought the little weights that you wrap around your ankles and wrists and I wear them at home (when I remember).

Yes yes yes! Exercise is very important to me. I started running/jogging for exercise in college and grad school, but was interrupted in it when my kids came along. I got back into it after being prodded by my therapist, I was depressed from a lot of issues (and way overweight); my younger child was 18 months then. I had not been a morning exerciser but became one because it seemed the only time that would work. I got up 5 - 5:30 and jogged around the neighborhood while my husband was on duty for the (mostly sleeping) kids. One of the things that really kept me with it was the sense of it as "me" time, I used to especially relish the 15 minutes I spent sitting out on the patio afterward, feeling so good physically and for once not feeling "on call". And it really helped me calm down and relieve stress as well as help me lose weight, have more energy, etc etc.

That was about 20 years ago, and I have been jogging ever since. Mostly in the morning, but if I had to I fit in a jog at lunch time at work or in the evening. In my 50s now, I am in far better shape than most of my peers and am told I look much younger than my age; not that that is the main reason to exercise but it doesn't hurt. I can't do without it now.

I have a whole range of mind games I play with myself to get out there when I don't feel like it. One is, when the alarm goes off, just tell myself I am putting on my running shorts - it is far easier than visualizing the whole run. By the time I had my shorts on I felt awake and ready to go. I always allow myself to run less than usual, but not skip the run totally unless there is a really good reason - it is more important to maintain the habit than to do a lot of exercise, it is easier to increase later on. When I started I felt shy about it because I "wasn't a runner" and I was fat, but learned to look at it that I was doing better than most people, who cares if I was not a "real" athlete. I think that the mental blocks are harder than the physical ones.

I think all sorts of exercise are good but I stuck to running because it is efficient, gets a lot of exercise in in the minimum time, takes little equipment, can be done anywhere (and in almost any weather, really!), doesn't need an appointment or a partner, etc etc. But I like biking and sports as well.

According to my brother ( a researcher in the field of liver/kidneys), the body has a basic setting of fat levels. It takes some time for the body to adjust to a new 'fat level'. About 6 months to a year once gained, The good news is that you have 6 months during which the fat can be lost relatively easily. The bad news, after 6 months or so, your body has adjusted to your new weight, and now that is your base level, and now the fat is much harder to lose. I am paraphrasing here - but that is the jist of it.

http://www.familyandhome.org/index.php

family and home network has articles, links and boards. they used to promote staying at home with kids, but now they are more about balancing work and family. Tons of info about babies and pregnancy, through parenting teens and young adults, etc. You might find contacts local to your area.

check out MOPS - mothers of preschoolers. Babies count as preschoolers! They have lots of meetings and activities.

Quark, lol. I felt so proud of myself when we got the baby backpack and I was getting us out and about a lot -- this was back when I was working part-time and going to the gym 5-6x a week, so I was hugely proud of myself that I could carry the backpack longer and faster than my husband! Then my daughter started walking, and the backpack has been gathering dust since then. Although now that she's 5, we've discovered she can ride her bike while we walk, and we all keep a more reasonable pace -- and luckily, her brother seems to really enjoy just sitting in the backpack (though since he's already 30 lbs, we can't take it for too long!).

Ditto on the weight as well. I gained 60+ lbs with both pregnancies. And no, it wasn't that I just decided it was a great excuse to go hog-wild -- I really hate that whole concept that if you gain more than 25-30 lbs, you're just a pig. Heck, I worked with a dietician with my second, and gained even more than with the first! But with my first, all of that weight just dropped off within the first 3 months, without me even trying. With the second, I dropped like a stone to within @ 15 lbs of my pre-pregnancy weight, but then it just stopped -- guess I'm just older.

I agree with experienced mom about the hospital. I had my daughter at Arlington Medical Center and I thought the staff there were great. I had an easy delivery, but you never know when you will need a doctor.

As far as exercising goes, I try to walk. I am not much of a gym person because I fear germs, yeah really I do. I have a membership and never go, but am going to try to get there after all the ice melts!

Mary2again--I can't imagine keeping up the exercise I do now while having a nursing infant and working FT. OTOH, I've found that exercising within an hour before bedtime is entirely possible--that's when I exercise with DVD's at home (pilates is even somewhat relaxing) and while some people might get too revved up by exercising to be able to sleep immediately afterwards, I suspect most working parents are pretty good at nodding off whenever they get the opportunity, no matter what their recent activity level was!

Economics shouldn't be a factor. Two or three exercise DVDs aren't horribly expensive. You can also find a lot of them secondhand for just a few dollars. Jumpropes are cheap, and ten minutes with one while dinner cooks will get your heart rate up nicely. DH uses gallons of milk (milk gone, filled with water) as free weights. Walking outside in the winter is miserable, but do-able.

I had to really change my mindset about exercise after having kids. It's not something that requires a complete change of clothes, 45 minutes of attention, a shower and a change of clothes afterwards. I walk in my work clothes and just change shoes. I devote ten minutes to exercise if all I can carve out is ten minutes. I stick in a Wiggles video for the kids and dance along with it. I look and feel like a total idiot but you wouldn't believe what a great workout those dances are, and the kids think it's the funniest thing EVER. I'm not training for competition--I'm just trying to avoid stagnation.

G,

Can you re-set your fat levels? Yikes!

Oh, how I WISH I could get dear hubby to go along with helping me get my exercise in before my work day. Problem is, I work from home and he sees it as my "free" time when I should be able to accomodate a work-out!

Gotta do something, though --- the mid-forties pounds are creeping on!

http://punditmom1.blogspot.com

Don't get hung up on having to go to a gym or outdoors, or having special equipment to exercise. Ten or fifteen minutes with a jumproap is killer. And you can use your own body weight as an exercise tool while doing sit-up, push-ups, and squats. Pump that can of corn over your head ten times before opening it when making dinner. Over the years I've found that the time I spend doing exercise really isn't time out of my day- the increased stamina I get from it evens out. (And yes, I work 10+ hours five days a week.)

Totally Off Topic

I vote for a hospital too. My first baby was "easy" and the cord was wrapped around her neck only once.

My second child stood a very real chance of dying as did I--as the cord was around his neck twice as well as around his chest. I would have a contraction and his heartrate plummeted. Not to mention he never turned properly, his head was very large--I was almost filleted in order to get him out FAST.

So, even with one baby down, you just never know what can go wrong, and if there will be TIME to get somewhere ELSE.

Just because you are in a hospital doesn't mean you have to avail yourself of all their services, nor does it doom you to a drug-resistant staph infection.

(But I did raise enough of a ruckus that I was released in less than 24 hours with both kids. I was and AM the sort of person you have to hog-tie to the bed rather than prod out of it, even 30 minutes post-partum.)

Good luck. Prepare yourself for what you want, then be prepared to change your mind.

my husband & i also wrestled with the spend time with family versus spend time exercising since we really couldn't do both. family time won out. now that son is older we're trying to make family exercise time.

last summer, once i was comfortable with son's biking on the street safety sense i started skating while he biked. i wasn't out there in my spandex like i had been pre-child but that was a workout.

we also got dance, dance revolution. that worked well. we haven't gotten it out since we moved but i maybe i'll do that tonight.

yes, i have read about fat index. i realize that i'm working against a whole lotta factors in trying to lose weight but i'm determine to lose it.

Does anyone else find the lunchtime exercisers who return to work drenched in sweat more than slightly unpleasant? I hate having to be in meetings with these people after lunch.

I try to walk during my lunchtime, but I don't think that I exert enough energy to make a difference. I perspire easily, don't have a place to change clothes or shower, and have a limited amount of time for lunch, so I don't push myself.

I, too, find that I see exercise as one more thing to take me away from my family. My husband has a physical job, not a desk job, and has no desire to exercise outside of work. I'd rather not walk alone, and the kids don't keep a pace that is fast enough. They are school-age and would rather watch bugs, jump over sidewalk cracks, and do other things than keep a steady pace with me.

I have picked up weight over the years, but my husband doesn't mind. At times when I have complained about picking up weight or clothes not fitting, he just says that I should buy something bigger that will be more comfortable and will make me look better because it won't be tight. Says he love who I am, not how I look. Wonderful, but doesn't give any extra boost to the motivation.

I find that people I know who are transplants tend to be able to find more time to exercise than those who have family in the area. We spend at least one weekend day every week or two with our parents, siblings, cousins, etc. Not necessarily all day long, but the amount of weekend time we spend with family does affect the amount of free time we have for our own pursuits.

Experienced mom, I'm in the District, and am leaning towards GW. However, there's a lot to the idea that "you're not sick, you're pregnant" so I understand the desire to hand yourself to people who view pregnancy and childbirth from a perspective other than the medical.

And, I've heard horror stories about hospital L&D nurses who live on absolutes: mustn't walk, mustn't eat or drink, not allowed to refuse the IV or the monitor... I don't think I'd cope real well with someone telling me what I'm not allowed to do at that particular moment.

With an HMO and a two-week wait to get even a preliminary appointment, I'm not sure how feasible it would be to interview doctors about their birth philosophy. Doctors in this town seem to be totally inaccessible, and not likely to sit down for friendly chats about what kind of birth experience I want. It's just my impression. I'd love for someone to tell me I'm wrong, and then tell me how to handle it!

Cheers everyone.

"And, I've heard horror stories about hospital L&D nurses who live on absolutes: mustn't walk, mustn't eat or drink, not allowed to refuse the IV or the monitor... I don't think I'd cope real well with someone telling me what I'm not allowed to do at that particular moment."

I had those nurses and got over it. Hence, I respectfully disagree, in this context. You are in control of the practice you selected, and the hospital at which you'll deliver (assuming you make it to the hospital). At the point when you are in labor, the most important thing to you in the universe is delivering a healthy baby, and survival. If you are comfortable with the hospital you've chosen (ours was Holy Cross and they were absolutely wonderful), you will cope well knowing that, in any event, you have no other option than to cope if you're going to deliver this baby, have her/him be healthy (to the extent any of us can control that outcome) and survive. The world actually gets very simple and focused for those hours in which you labor with Child 1.

Rain was in the forecast when we planned to go to Busch Gardens for our family vacation so instead we bought a trampoline with the money we would have otherwised spent at the amusement park.

20 minutes jumping on that thing in the morning puts me silly for the rest of the day.

And for the kids, they love it. When they are driving me nuts, I give them a choice:
1. Go to your room.
2. Jump on the trampoline until you sweat.

The trampoline gets used almost everyday. Just yesterday, I was watching a group of my son's neighborhood friends. In order to jump on our trampoline, the rule is to do 100 jumps by themselves to get the hang of it. then they can jump as a group.

It took about 2 minutes a piece to flatten out each kid.

I love it when the boys fall asleep before bbedtime!

Hi, and thanks for the comments on my piece today.

A few notes - my kids were 18 mos before I began swimming regularly. It is wimpy to say it was just too hard before that point?

When they were infants and still breasfeeding, I was on duty 24/7 to nurse them and too exhausted from sleep deprivation to willingly get up early for exercise. (I was off paid work for six months.)

At 5 mos I tried to go to an 8 p.m. masters swim after pumping (so pleasant), but was dead tired so that time slot didn't stick.

I am not at all a morning person, and remain surprised that I get up early 3-4 mornings/wk to swim. But it is the only time I have found that consistently works.

Yeah, my husband is the support that lets me leave the house for this. He also 'allows' me to put in ear plugs if the kids are waking at night, and deals with them. He has a sacred Sunday morning sleep-in.

His efforts, more than any material things which do nothing for me, lead to a very Happy Mama, which is so much better for family life than Crabby Mom.

As for commuting, clearly it sucks up the exact blocks of time one could use for exercise.

We have said NO to moving to the 'burbs for this reason.

It is much more costly to live in the city. We have a small, old, un-reno'd house and one small, old car. This doesn't matter 'cause we also have time.

How much choice do you have in where to live? Where does a healthy lifestyle rank in your priorities?

"Good luck. Prepare yourself for what you want, then be prepared to change your mind."

Sounds like excellent advice, not just for childbirth but for parenting.

Finding a good Ob/GYN in DC is like finding an honest man in Congress. It is dispiriting if you don't have an awesome provider during this exciting and sometimes scary time in your life. Trust your instincts and remember that most women in the world do it successfully without thos What to Expect books. Mother nature knows what she's doing and remember that your wedding day is just a day and marriage is about a lot more than that day. Having your child is one day (hopefully) and you have a lifetime together too. I'm envious - I'd love to go back and do it the first time again - nothing like it at all. Magic. Although I'm one of thos wackos that thinks being pregnant and giving birth is a privelidge and feel sorry for my dh since he doesn't get to experience it.

TOT - I have HMO coverage and had a natural childbirth. It was in a hospital because I think giving birth anywhere else is irresponsible.

I was prepared, didn't go in too early, stayed calm, and delivered with very little intervention.

With an HMO, particularly one where the Docs rotate, you are in control. They follow your lead unless things get dangerous, which is why you need them.

I really appreciated this guest blog. I have two kids, 3 and 5 and have been a stay at home mom the whole time. The only days I have not exercised have been when I've just had a baby, or am deathly ill. For two years after my second was born, I ran with them in a jogging stroller. If our house had been on fire, I would have gotten my kids out first, and then the stroller. It was my best friend, and my husband recently suggested that I sell it and get a single, since my older son is now in school and never run with him anymore, but I am so attached to it that I don't think I can do it. FOR ANYONE WHO THINKS THEIR KIDS WILL NOT SIT STILL FOR AN HOUR IN THE JOGGING STROLLER: I started my kids young, and I gave them a small treat when they first got in and let them take one toy. After that, I would put my headphones on and turn the volume up and hell or high water could not stop me! If they dropped their toy, I wouldn't stop (sometimes I would see it after turning around, or the next day and I would grab it then). If they cried, they cried, it was for an hour max, and after a few weeks, I can count the number of times they cried during runs on one hand. When it was raining, or really cold, my rain cover did the trick. I have, at various times, tried other solutions to fitting activity in, from gyms with childcare to hiring a babysitter to getting up early, before my husband leaves, and by far and away, the stroller has been the best fit for me. I could run anytime I wanted, got an even better workout than running alone and my kids came to love it (and got outside time every day). And nothing in the world beats blowing past another runner while pushing a hundred pounds of kid and stroller, plus all the encouraging looks and comments I would get from people out on the trail. I even used to see a woman running with two babies and a toddler in a TRIPLE jogging stroller and evertime I saw her I wanted to yell YOU GO GIRL!! I can't say enough good things about having a jogging stroller. I would suggest you invest in a really good one (my double was about 400$), especially if you plan to use it everyday. Good luck to all who are working on exercise as a new year's resolution! You can do it, no matter what your lifestyle, if you make it a priority!

I've found a hobby that enables me to exercise as part of my daily routine. I'm fortunate enough to live within biking distance of work and do so most days of the year. It's not just "exercise": It's how I get to work and it's fun. Plus, it's a burnoff of some 700 - 800 calories each time I commute round trip! If one is busy, exercise has to be part-and-parcel of everyday life, or it gets lost in the shuffle.

Quark, you play Dance, Dance Revolution?

I think I just heard a Mom advocating a video game. I am starting to tear up, here...

I've found a hobby that enables me to exercise as part of my daily routine. I'm fortunate enough to live within biking distance of work and do so most days of the year. It's not just "exercise": It's how I get to work and it's fun. Plus, it's a burnoff of some 700 - 800 calories each time I commute round trip! If one is busy, exercise has to be part-and-parcel of everyday life, or it gets lost in the shuffle.

Has anyone tried the Leslie Sansone "Walk Away the Pounds" DVDs? I was doing reasonably well with a walking routine before the weather turned cold but need something aerobic for indoors now. I saw the DVDs on a website where I've purchased some decent Yoga DVDs. Sansone's website advertises some DVDs that incorporate a spiritual element, something I'm not interested in. Does anyone know if all of her DVDs have the religious part or are some straight exercise?

I'm all for running when and where you can but I think my kid's outside time should be spent with him running around instead of just me. He likes the jogging/bike stroller as long as he is only in it on the way to the park, river, wherever so he can run around and play...

My exercise consists of commuting to work by bicycle. I've been doing this for about 10 years. My commute has varied from 8 miles to 30 miles. At all times, biking has been the fastest, cheapest, most environmentally friendly, and relaxing option to get to work. Since it costs about $28 per day to park, very few "ham and eggers" can afford this option. Biking from 30 miles took about 1:45 while the train/subway option took 2 hours. As a result, biking has helped me be more balanced since I'm home longer in the morning and return earlier in the evening.

What's a "ham and egger"?

to runnermom - you have found your solutions. thanks for sharing, but honestly, I wouldn't run in the cold or rain by myself, much less with a stroller.

also, as someone already mentioned, the cost of a jogging stroller can be hard on families on a budget.

equal_too, I'm not disagreeing with the substance of your comment, but I am confused. You said biking is the cheapest option to get to work, but it costs about $28 per day to park. Is $28 per day really the least expensive commuting option you have? Where do you live and work?

What's a "ham and egger"?

to runnermom - you have found your solutions. thanks for sharing, but honestly, I wouldn't run in the cold or rain by myself, much less with a stroller.

also, as someone already mentioned, the cost of a jogging stroller can be hard on families on a budget.

A "ham and egger" is a term my buddies and I use to describe a working class person. I'm not sure of the origin. Maybe it was in a pub about 10-15 years ago.

Another Librarianmom--I know a lot of people who have used the Leslie Sansone WATP videos. I've never heard anything about a "spiritual element," though. They are pretty decent workouts, from all I've heard, although several people have commented on the chatter between the women in the video--apparently it can get on your nerves. But people who are bothered by this just put on their own music and turn the sound down.

$400 for a jog stroller? I just can't relate to this.

and if a toy is dropped, you don't stop to pick it up? Tell me again what the kiddos get out of this other than fresh air? you're a SAH mom, and your husband can't watch the kids after work so you can run on your own without confinining the kids in a stroller in all kinds of weather? Clearly this works for you and your husband, but it makes no sense to me.

I'd much rather walk with my kids to a park a couple of miles away and stop to watch the butterflies, snakes, and various dogs on the pathway, play on the playground when we get there, and race each other for short distances on the way back, and run or work out after my husband gets home.

To each his own.

"And, I've heard horror stories about hospital L&D nurses who live on absolutes: mustn't walk, mustn't eat or drink, not allowed to refuse the IV or the monitor... I don't think I'd cope real well with someone telling me what I'm not allowed to do at that particular moment."

Me, too -- I ran into all that stuff, and it drove me completely nuts. Least favorite was when they delayed my induction by a day because I'd had a glass of milk (had gestational diabetes and was worried about blood sugar crash, and no one told me otherwise). But the good(?) news was, after the first hour or two, I was in too much pain to worry about it any more. :-)

FYI, those rules are likely set by the hospital, not your doc or the nurse (in my case, my doc happened to be the one who had written the rules for the hospital, so she was un-effing-believably stringent). Most hospitals offer tours for expecting parents, so you should be able to figure those things out in advance despite the problems getting in to see a doc.

And btw, despite my aggravation, I'd take my doc again in a heartbeat, because she knew her stuff and did everything necessary to get me through a very risky pregnancy, and I ended up with a healthy baby boy. Which is the only thing that matters in the end.

I hate to exercise pretty much more than anything else in the whole world. I hate radical Islam more, but not by much.

Incidental exercise is a different ball of wax. When I started grad school, I used to get a ton of exercise walking back and forth to school (about 2 miles away from my apartment), especially when carrying tons of books. I don't have much incidental exercise in my life anymore, so I take one of my dogs on long walks through different neighborhoods. He gets to chase squirrels, I get to see parts of the city I might not otherwise, and we both have a good time. Well, an okay time. I also take the stairs instead of using elevators and walk to do my errands as much as I can.

"How much choice do you have in where to live? Where does a healthy lifestyle rank in your priorities?"

Allison- thank you for including that comment on our lifestyles today!

We also choose to stay in the city for lifestyle reasons. We have 2 hrs more time per day since we don't commute and we walk EVERYWHERE. We have 1 car that we paid for with cash that we barely use. We also live in an apartment instead of a 3000 sq ft mcmansion that we would be able to afford in the burbs.

I walk my daughter to school, then I walk to work, then pick her up and walk home. I walk about an hour/day during the week and about 2-3 hrs on the weekends on playground, museum trips, etc..

I grew up in the burbs and I really didn't enjoy the lifestyle. I love walking everywhere, especially in DC- I fall in love with the city through nice leisurely walks in all different neighborhoods. It's built in exercise that invigorates me daily.

Great point Allison!

This is for Mona, who posted way up there and seems a little worried:
When I got pregnant the first time, one of my biggest worries was that I'd never be in good shape again and that I'd be fat for life. I shouldn't have worried at all about that (hell, there were plenty of other things to worry about!). It turned out that I lost weight pretty quickly -- I breastfed what seemed like all the time, which is a big calorie burner -- and actually got into great shape by walking for hours on end with my baby in a front carrier and, later, a backpack.
I am a very serious runner, and I would say the hikes with baby were equivalent to hard, long runs. I did miss out on many of the races I usually do, but that was a temporary loss.
Things get more complicated with a second or third or subsequent child, and not all babies or toddlers have a tolerance for sitting for long periods in a jogging stroller or backpack. Still, I've found that I can stay in shape by being very efficient in my workouts. I don't do those three- or four-hour mountain runs anymore, but I do a lot more speed work, for example. And the gym's child care center is very important to my life and happiness.
As for women using pregnancy as an "excuse" to eat more than they should, I think this is a myth, for the most part. Pregnant women are notoriously queasy, and many have a hard time eating anything at all. Often, junky and oily food is the precise stuff that makes pregnant women feel sick, and they tend to avoid it. It is helpful, though, when you're in the throes of nausea to eat frequently, especially protein and complex carbs, because an empty stomach makes things much worse. And when pregnant women do crave some kind of food, my observation is that it's something like grapefruit or some other wholesome fare that, probably, their bodies need for some reason. In general, I think pregnant women are going to gain whatever weight their bodies need to pack on, and the amount of food they take in -- within reasonable parameters -- doesn't have much effect on the total poundage.
In sum, this is not what should worry you. There are so many other things to worry about!

Totally Off Topic:

I would have to recommend that you have your baby in a hospital if possible. I had both my babies at Sibley in DC, and it was a fantastic hospital. My first son's birth was completely normal. My second son turned himself around in such a complicated way (even though he had been in the proper position -head down- the entire pregnancy), that my emergency c-section after my water broke was truly an emergency. The doctors had such a difficult time getting him out, that they had to make an incision up to my belly button to get him out. His first apgar score was very low, but thankfully he quickly rebounded. He is a very healthy and happy 8 month old baby now, but I am so very thankful that I was in a good hospital. Good luck with everything!

I think too many people get caught up in trying to lose weight as if the bathroom scale is the determiner of well-being.

The point of diet and exercize is to feel good. Not withstanding pregnancy, Studies show that only 1 in 20 people can lose a substancial amount of weight and keep it off.

So, if you're anything like the 95% of the rest of us, you may want to make your personal goal of your exersize program to keep healthy and be able to do the physical things that you enjoy.

Mona,

I only gained ten pounds with my daughter and she weighed seven, so I left the hospital in my jeans. Believe me, there are worse things then gaining weight when pregnant. :)

Also -- In defense of expensive strollers:
If you use a stroller daily, you need a good one. And if you travel over rough terrain -- dirt trails, gravel roads, ice, snow drifts, etc. -- a sturdy ATV stroller is a necessity. I live in a northern climate. I had a cheap stroller, and while using it on a downtown street in March, a front wheel just snapped off after bumping into a relatively small amount of ice buildup on the sidewalk. The stroller was ruined, and I had to carry it and my baby around for the rest of the day. Not good. Those run-of-the-mill plastic type strollers are OK for inside the mall, but not for the real outdoors.

Alison, I'm with you. I'd so much rather live in the city than commute every day. To me, there is nothing more boring than driving. I despise my daily commute from Rockville to College Park, especially when all that's on the radio is lame morning shows, no music (and my car is old and about to go to Purple Heart; I am not installing a cd player). I would much prefer a spacious apartment or condo in the city, walking/biking/pubtrans distance to work, than a large house and two SUVs in the suburbs. But the boyfriend swears it's only acceptable to raise kids in a house, hates the city, and we'll have to compromise if we want to be together. I just hope he's prepared to carpool, because I absolutely despise commuting. I agree with you that it's probably much easier to exercise when you don't have to spend two hours in traffic.

anon mom, I agree with you, but consider that this raises the issue once again of economics. The average family cannot afford a $400 "investment" in non-essential equipment. If one has an extra $400 in the ol' budget, great. But this becomes the board of the privileged with comments like "ham and egger" and references to $400 play equipment. What a turn-off.

10 pounds with a seven pound baby? Don't believe it for a minute. See below:

Baby - 7½ pounds
Enlargement of uterus - 2 pounds
Placenta - 1½ pounds
Amniotic fluid - 2 pounds
Breast enlargement - 2 pounds
Extra blood and fluid volume - 8 pounds
Extra fat stores - 7 pounds
Total - 30 pounds

"$400 for a jog stroller? I just can't relate to this."

Me either, Thank God!!! My form of exercise? Wonderful CF sex! It's best when the end result isn't a baby!

More in defense of expensive strollers. I've used mine 2 - 4 times a week for five years. $400 stroller / 60 months = less than $7 a month. If you really use the stroller, it's a great deal. And I've got a four years of running with a kid still to go.

To RunnerMom: YOU GO GIRL!

anon mom and scarry: thanks so much for the info. I'm filing all this away in my mental "for later use" file.

Wow, some people. Patronize much?

I live 45 minutes away from my job because this is where we can afford a house with a decent school system. I work full-time because I carry the health insurance. Why yes, a healthy lifestyle ranks reasonably high in my priority list... but a house in a safe neighborhood, and health insurance for my entire family actually rank higher.

FWIW, I'm not trying to lose pregnancy weight. I did that the first week after I had the baby. I actually lost an additional 25 lbs because of nursing. I just wanted to be more in shape.

It looks like I just have to wait a while. I can just see my toddler hanging on my legs while I try to jump rope (although the jump rope in and of itself isn't a bad idea). Now, where to jump so the house isn't shaking and I'm not waking up the kid...

do those who run ever use a treadmill? Do you find you get the same quality of run when you do use one versus just running?

to "to scarry":

If you're going to be snarky, you might want to pick a topic you know more about than how much weight Scarry gained when she was pregnant. She's ultimately the only who knows that info, capice?

Second, when someone says she gained a certain amount of pounds during pregnancy, you should allow for the fact that she might have lost weight during the initial 6 months due to nausea and/or various other health factors, and regained baby related weight.

btw, I gained 13 pounds with the first baby and 17 pounds with the second. Wanna bet me? I love taking easy money from know-it-alls.

"10 pounds with a seven pound baby? Don't believe it for a minute."

I can't speak for Scarry, but I believe it's possible. I was so sick with morning sickness all day long, that I actually lost weight during the first half of my pregnancy. I also gave up my bad eating habits while pregnant so when i did start gaining it wasn't the typical amount.

s, I find treadmills disorienting. Moving your legs while the ground moves underneath you is way different than you moving yourself over the ground. It's great for some, I'm sure, and I used to love the treadmill. But now it's track or trail for me.

Choice about where to live? How timely! My husband and I are now facing the difficult choice about staying in the city or moving to the suburbs.

I think the reality is that most people simply can't afford to stay in the city with kids, even if they'd like to. At least for DC, that is. The vast majority of public schools here are very poor quality, and the price of houses (or even 2 or 3 bedroom condos) in neighborhoods with decent quality schools are simply out of most people's price ranges at this point. To live in them you either had to purchase in a much better market or you have much more money than most of us. Sure, there is the select good charter school or public school here and there, but then what happens in middle school and high school? And if you pay for private school, you're again in a different income bracket.