The M Word

Our culture is not exactly crazy about discussing a)older women and b)female plumbing.

So it is no surprise that MENOPAUSE is a subject that causes even the most unflappable to cringe. But before you turn away from the screen, I promise you the words below are worth reading -- even if you are under 40 years old, even if you are a man. Here is your chance to learn critical facts about your future health and easy ways to become a more sensitive employer, husband or friend.

A few facts: The transition to menopause typically occurs starting from age 40 to 58 and can last from one to 12 years. Menopause is characterized by irregular (and eventually, zero) periods, hot flashes, night sweats, changes in sleep habits, a slower metabolism and hormonal changes. You can still get pregnant while transitioning through menopause, so be careful!

The most surprising thing about menopause -- given that there are 477 million postmenopausal women worldwide -- is that there have not been more consumer guides on the subject published recently. But thanks to almost three years of research and synthesis by two Newsweek health writers, Pat Wingert and Barbara Kantrowitz, we've now got Is It Hot In Here Or Is It Me? The Complete Guide to Menopause. The publisher, Workman Publishing, also brought us the much loved, much hated What to Expect When You're Expecting series. The Complete Guide to Menopause is clearly meant to be a sequel of sorts -- What to Expect When You'll Never Expect Again. The book, a hefty paperback, is filled with anecdotes, information about types of menopause, hormonal changes, diet, exercise, stress, cancer and medications, plus dozens of cartoons.

So what does menopause have to do with balancing work and family?

"For many of us, this is a time in life when the balancing act gets tricky. We may have children at home and we're likely to be caring for aging parents as well. The symptoms of menopause can be troubling at work because we live in a society that values youth and reaching menopause is an unavoidable sign that you are no longer young," explain Kantrowitz and Wingert. "You may work out and color your hair regularly, but you're not 25 any more. If you're having a hot flash in a meeting, you really don't want to admit it -- even to an all-female audience. A friend who's a surgeon says she sometimes has hot flashes in the operating room. She just keeps going -- good advice for all of us. We're hoping that as more and more women of our generation reach this milestone, we will all learn to become more accepting. We're not going to get any younger by ignoring menopause."

In our societal rush to avoid talking about the negatives of menopause, we miss out on the positives. The book outlines the many benefits to the "change of life."

"On the plus side, menopause does bring a sense of freedom and not just because you can't get pregnant any more," say Wingert and Kantrowitz. "Many of us have spent years taking care of other people -- our kids, perhaps our elderly parents, even colleagues at work. Many of the women we spoke to said that they now wanted to focus on themselves and do the things they have been putting off for so long. For some women, that means starting their own businesses or changing careers. It's a time in life to reflect on where you've been -- and where you want to go next."

What do you have to say about menopause? Questions? Advice? Secret fears? Hilarious stories you'd like to tell the world?

To learn more about menopause, visit the National Women's Health Information Center or the North American Menopause Society. There is also a comprehensive list of helpful organizations and Web sites listed in Appendix II of The Complete Guide to Menopause. Another good source is Our Bodies, Ourselves:Menopause, also recently published; the Web site includes informative chapter excerpts.

By Leslie Morgan Steiner |  January 17, 2007; 7:18 AM ET  | Category:  Moms in the News
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