Hill Rats v. Hill Rats
The year of the rat has come a year early, at least on Capitol Hill.
While the year of the rat, according to the Chinese zodiac calendar, is not scheduled to occur until 2008 - rats are swarming certain neighborhoods on Capitol Hill. The infestation seems to have grown worse since the fire last month that burned down Washington's historic Eastern Market. Apparently, the inferno displaced legions of rodents from their cozy habitat inside the old walls of the Eastern Market building and sent them scampering up and down the streets of Capitol Hill. (As if it needed more rats!)
Thus, congressional aides who thought they'd have an easy week this Memorial Day recess drinking beer, flipping burgers and trimming the hedges are instead battling football-sized rats in their yards.
Take Gregory Keeley, an aide to Rep. Ed Royce (R-Calif.), for example. Keeley sent out an email to friends and colleagues Friday with a link to this local Fox TV news story featuring him as a vigilante rat slayer. In his email, Keeley called it "the TV news story of the year....it's about rats."
Later, he told us that he and his wife, Katie Kane Keeley, are thinking of "naming the rats, or maybe numbering them would be more practical - as we would quickly run out of names - to try and keep track."
At least he has his cat Rummy (who, yes, was named for the former defense secretary) to help out. Let's just hope Rummy the feline has more success chasing rats than Rummy the SecDef did catching insurgents in Iraq.
And it's not like Keeley is a wimp or anything. A broad-shouldered Australian with permanent U.S. residency - he's scheduled to become a U.S. citizen on Jan. 8, 2008 - Keeley served in Iraq with the Australian Navy.
Even after all that, battling the rats is really getting to him.
"Given the calls to the city have gone unheeded, I am thinking about taking a leaf from the late great fellow Aussie Steve Irwin's playbook - tackling the monster rats whilst exclaiming, 'Crikey! It's a big one!" Keely says. "Beats poking them with a broom handle."
Keeley and his neighbors have asked the city to step up its rat abatement program. "Mayor Fenty seriously needs to stand up and say 'the rat stops here,'" Keeley says.
By Mary Ann Akers |
June 1, 2007; 5:05 PM ET
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Posted by: St. Augustine | June 2, 2007 5:50 PM
Ha!
Good one St. Augustine!
This St Augustine is funny! Those of us forced to read "Confessions" know this was not always the case.
Posted by: otter357 | June 2, 2007 9:28 PM
We might not eRATicate them all, but if we had term limits we would at least get some turnover, new ideas, and perhaps, a focus on what the country needs instead of retention of power by the elitists.
Posted by: r man | June 4, 2007 7:11 AM
I remember them but it surprised me that they appeared in back yards. Numbers are quick IDs but names are better. I call mine, Hairy, 'manuel, Shoomer, Plosee, Hoyar, & Murtaw. When I call them by name, they run scared. Sometimes at tax payersexpense to other countries. But it does get them moving to some other place.
Posted by: james | June 4, 2007 10:51 AM
Echo? After Nixon vetoed funding for DC rat eradication late in 1972, we made a 12 foot papier mache float of a Nixonfaced rat, displayed on the fringes of his Inaugural until it was siezed by the US Park Police on the President's personal order.
Posted by: Ben Masel | June 4, 2007 12:03 PM
The rats are organized religion. To quote Jesse Ventura. "Organized religion is for the simple minded."
Posted by: TM | June 4, 2007 1:04 PM
My husband, son, and I were having a drink at the Mayflower Hotel on May 12th (I'll never forget the date!) and a RAT ran down the bar, jumped off, ran back behind the bar, and out of sight. Needless to say, after a moment of stunned silence, the shrieking began! This is now my new and favorite "rats" in DC story.
Posted by: Joan thomas | June 4, 2007 2:23 PM
If you live near the new temporary Eastern Market at Hine JHS, be advised that it will be managed by the same contractors responsible for keeping the old Eastern Market rat-free.
Posted by: Mike Licht | June 4, 2007 3:00 PM
Mary Ann Akers, so nice to see you here. Glad you are alive and well and spreading your wit and wisdom (and irreverance) for wider audiences.
Posted by: Dave Rosso | June 4, 2007 3:32 PM
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Methinks eradication shouldst begin on K Street.