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Gulf tusk force

By Tom Toles

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***

Excellent adventure

In a way you've got to love him. Gary Faulkner, Osama bin Laden 9/11 avenger. Setting out alone to Pakistan to hunt down America's nemesis with a dagger, a Chinese pistol and a 40-inch sword in case things get REALLY intense. For philosophical sustenance, a book of Christian verses. And some hashish. I'm next to certain that that book of Christian verses included all the best instances of Jesus preaching about good ways to seek revenge and kill your enemies by sneaking up on them with night-vision goggles and a Chinese pistol.

This is the American Movie version of how international problems get solved. President Bush put on a flight suit to audition for that movie. Gary Faulkner just got arrested. But in the next scene, Gary ESCAPES and is seen crouching behind a boulder in light evening drizzle, just outside Osama's cave! Bin Laden's bodyguards walk RIGHT BY but DON'T SEE HIM. Time for a quick hit of that hash! --Tom Toles

***

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By Tom Toles  | June 17, 2010; 12:00 AM ET
Categories:  Environment, Federal government  
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Comments

Kudos to Mr. Faulkner! We need more Americans like him. "Tinker" aka Tom can go on wagging his tongue about how Osama needs his "due process", well Mr. Faulkner may have been the wrong one to do it, being such an ameteur, but there are plenty of ex. military snipers out there who should be able to pull this off. Maybe Mr. Faulkner will inspire some to take out Osama.

I hope that Obama does the right thing and has Mr. Faulkner declared criminally insane by a US psychiatrist, bring him back to the US while "treating" him on the flight over so that he is "cured" when he gets to American soil and goes home to a heroes' welcome that he deserves for at least having the gonads for trying. Something Tinker er Tom would not have.

Posted by: ATrueChristian | June 17, 2010 11:58 AM | Report abuse

Tusk, tusk, tusk, to your Obama sketch.

Though I must add—President Obama if you are STILL smoking, quit! All it takes is Will Power.
Just make up your mind and DO It….worked for me. You have to really Want to quit though in order to achieve freedom from the Beast. You might also have better luck achieving the goal of The Health Care Plan.

As for Gary Faulkner, brought a smile to my face….Like a Silent Shout in the Desert to the U.S. with The Knife and all.

Posted by: bertzel | June 17, 2010 10:53 AM | Report abuse

Coo Coo Cachoo, Coo Coo Cachoo!!!

Posted by: bavery1 | June 17, 2010 10:33 AM | Report abuse

Dear Thinker, I suggest that Arlington National Cemetary be overseen by retired members of the 3rd US Infantry Regiment. They guard the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. It takes the right people to do any job properly. Who better than the ones that have the most demanding job at Arlington and do it so well? The Government breaking promises is nothing new. The promise of complete health care for veterans was broken along time ago. Does anyone think that the Government will keep it's promises on health care for all Americans? Thinker, is there any chance of you finding other ways of labeling us closed minded flag wavers? "Sheep, ding dongs, Fascist sheep", really? You bring to mind a quote from our beloved leader Dean Rusk, Secretary of State under Presidents Kennedy and Johnson. He uttered those stirring words, "If you can't get along with people, at least dress well". It always amazes me how the caring, thoughtful, open minded, all inclusive Left do more name calling then what is heard on a elementary school playground.

Posted by: bobbo2 | June 17, 2010 9:50 AM | Report abuse

They found Faulkner in just 14 hours. How long has everyone been looking for bin Laden? The guy must be a ninja.

Posted by: Gurduloo | June 17, 2010 8:59 AM | Report abuse

You got that right, Tom. When this guy tries it, he gets arrested but when AMERICA does the same thing...well, might makes right.

Posted by: cmecyclist | June 17, 2010 5:04 AM | Report abuse

Any of you flag-waving sheep have any other suggested destinations where I can go to get my USA on? I mean, since Arlington Cemetery has now been shown to be just one more case of the USA not living up to her promise toward veterans.

Let me clue you ding dongs in on something somebody should have told you when you were still young and impressionable:

Its all complete B S.

There. Now, maybe you can open your minds to something - anything. Heck! You might even be able to one day form your very OWN opinions! Imagine that.

fascist sheep.

Posted by: Thinker_ | June 17, 2010 4:23 AM | Report abuse

Tom,
Regarding your "Sketchbook" cartoon, that was my first impression of the speech.
However, since I've watched it a couple of times more and read the text of the speech, I've decided I completely misjudged it.
I'm glad you didn't make it into a full-blown cartoon.

Posted by: Judy-in-TX | June 17, 2010 1:44 AM | Report abuse

Now as things generally go with today's criminal's----Gary Faulkner after all the legal mumbo-jumbo is done, he'll land his own reality show, or perhaps because an "Intelligence Czar."

Posted by: fromthecheapseats | June 16, 2010 10:57 PM | Report abuse

Thats a killer cartoon and blog. Smoke em if you got em how cool.

Posted by: taxcutsin12 | June 16, 2010 8:52 PM | Report abuse

Kevin1707---I think the NRA was founded by Confucius since gun powder was a Chinese
invention.

bobbo2---I think Osama actually belonged to one of those agencies. I have heard he shaved his beard, had plastic surgery, snuck across the border from Mexico, lives in Las Vegas, and now plays Black Jack for a living.

Tom---I also heard they found a 700 club membership card in Gary's wallet with Pat Robertson's phone# on it. I think Obama is planning to add sand and gravel to the oil slick and turn it into an asphalt Island Nation he can call his own. No SS#s required. It could be his first great infrastructure project.

Seriously if the truth be known the Gulf might be history. I have heard an expert say that a nuclear explosive device may be the only answer to shutting off the flow of oil. Something the Russians have done before on a deep inland oil well. But may not work under water. He says there are several fractures on the ocean floor that are also leaking oil because the casing of the well has been compromised. Relief wells would only make it worse. He also said that the well is much deeper than has been publicly stated and has tapped into gas pressure that originates from the Earth's core. It could turn out to be a permanent opening that will never be closed. God forbid.

Posted by: JONAHandtheFISH | June 16, 2010 8:46 PM | Report abuse

Wasn't the NRA founded by Jesus? or is it just "Jesus Approved?"

Posted by: Kevin71707 | June 16, 2010 7:36 PM | Report abuse

At least someone is looking for Osama bin Laden. The CIA, NSA, and whatever other three letter organizations that are looking for him are an embarassment. I say that there are two ways to find Osama bin Laden. 1. Raise the bounty to 1 billion dollars and a new identity. 2. Put him on the mailing list to Publisher's Clearinghouse.

Posted by: bobbo2 | June 16, 2010 7:30 PM | Report abuse

Koo-koo-ka-choo!

Posted by: fr3dmars | June 16, 2010 6:48 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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