A Walk in the Garden to Remember

By Suzanne Higgs

I've done my best to avoid thinking about April 16th, until today. I didn't go to the 11:45 p.m. vigil last night. I just wasn't ready. I couldn't bring myself to go to the commemoration ceremony this morning either.

Last April, that day was cold, snowy and windy, one of the windiest days I've ever experienced on Blacksburg. I remember walking across the Drillfield that afternoon, and it was blowing me backward.

Today is a stark contrast. It made me feel so much better that the sun is out and that it's a gorgeous day. With this perfect day, I chose to go to the Hahn Horticulture Garden for one of the afternoon tours to clear my head and prepare myself for the rest of today's events.

I met my group of friends at the Horticulture Pavilion. Everyone there was clad in orange and maroon; some were students, many were not. The tour had almost nothing to do with the shootings; they were meant to offer a nice walk around the different gardens and to take in the beauty of our campus in spring. The first stop on the tour, however, honored Jocelyne Couture-Nowak, one of the victims who was a dedicated horticulturalist. According to the tour guide, the new terraced gardens outside the pavilion will be built in her memory.

As our tour was taking place, a video camera followed us. At first I got defensive. I kept thinking, "Even here?" The tour was supposed to be a place of meditation away from the events on the Drillfield. Soon, I realized, though, that they were with the university, and I was no longer angry.

I'm really happy that they offered this alternative expression of remembrance. It's always helped me to see things that are beautiful and peaceful, even when my emotions and my environment don't reflect the same.

By Amy L. Kovac |  April 16, 2008; 6:30 PM ET  | Category:  Suzanne Higgs
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